Jaymie, listen to me. It's ok. Everybody goes this. I never been thru what you went thru so I'm not going to begin to say I know how you feel because I don't. I can only imagine thou, but I'll probably imagine it wrong. I'm sure you saw one of my posts where I wish I could b&p, but that's because I felt like I ate too much. I know I can't b&p, nor do I ever want to, but it's a quick way out and that's not the way to go.
You honestly can't let your clothes run your life. If that would happen, I would never have to courage to post a picture of me in my shorts. Yes, I believe I'm still fat because I'm in a 16, but I know that's not true. When I lived at home, I was a 14, then when I left home, I went to a 16. I had my daughter and got up to a 20, but now I'm a 16 again. I hate to see my stomach. I know it could be worse, but I also know it could be better too. It's all on me now. It's my turn to step up and say I want to be better. I see the people who wear the sizes 0-10 and how I dream that could be me. I don't know if I could see a zero, but a 10 would be nice.
Just take one day at a time and it all will come out in the end. You've done such a damn good job to get this far, I pray you don't ruin it now. You will have bad days or bad weeks or bad months. I can't tell you enough that you can always pm me and just talk. If you want to call, I can give you my numbers. If you want to email, I can give you that. Don't beat yourself up because of one bad day.
I love you honey. Just remember that.