That sounds like ED talking.
That sounds much healthier, even though the outcome is the same.
Also: no worries about the whiny bitchy days. We all have them and it´s better to keep talking than to go silent.
Floater's diary
- Thread starter Floater
- Start date
Also: no worries about the whiny bitchy days. We all have them and it´s better to keep talking than to go silent.
Floater
Well-known member
I made it to the gym. It was full of dudebros... One bearded guy kept having a bluetooth phone conversation about how something he had seen on instagram had been embarassing and lame, and he just went on and on about the most mundane shit. Like, fine, if you want to gossip while working out, you do you, but do you have to be so LOUD? And he was over 30, too.
I had a hard time focusing but got a decent workout in. I felt super self conscious, though; there were 30 dudebros in varying states of chiseledness, and then there was me, a sentient tub of cottage cheese. I hurt my knee while squatting but not too badly, my left knee is always a bit wonky, but it settled down during my walk back home.
I felt absolutely disgusted about the idea of eating anything so I knew it was important to eat something. I did a quick calorie count of what I've eaten today and got myself a double cheeseburger and forced it down while walking. Nutritionally shit, but will prevent my muscles from breaking down. I'm at home now drinking a protein shake, will soon walk the dog, and then try to sleep and not think about anything too much. I do feel a bit better now than before I left for the gym though.
I had a hard time focusing but got a decent workout in. I felt super self conscious, though; there were 30 dudebros in varying states of chiseledness, and then there was me, a sentient tub of cottage cheese. I hurt my knee while squatting but not too badly, my left knee is always a bit wonky, but it settled down during my walk back home.
I felt absolutely disgusted about the idea of eating anything so I knew it was important to eat something. I did a quick calorie count of what I've eaten today and got myself a double cheeseburger and forced it down while walking. Nutritionally shit, but will prevent my muscles from breaking down. I'm at home now drinking a protein shake, will soon walk the dog, and then try to sleep and not think about anything too much. I do feel a bit better now than before I left for the gym though.
Floater
Well-known member
I feel guilty but after walking the dog, I got SO HUNGRY. I ate a two-egg spinach omelette with four slices (46kcal per slice) of rye bread, two of them with marg and two with cheese.
On the other hand it's hard to stay feeling guilty when the meal made me feel satiated and good and I know my muscles won't hurt as much tomorrow after getting some protein and good fibre-rich carbs, veg, and good fat in.
On the other hand it's hard to stay feeling guilty when the meal made me feel satiated and good and I know my muscles won't hurt as much tomorrow after getting some protein and good fibre-rich carbs, veg, and good fat in.
Cate
Long term member
Can you buy enough food to turn the stuff you have at home already into something more appealing? I'm glad you ring a hotline when you need to.
You just posted while I was typing. I like that! Don't feel guilty about eating nutritious food after exercise. You are very hard on yourself & you deserve better than that.
You just posted while I was typing. I like that! Don't feel guilty about eating nutritious food after exercise. You are very hard on yourself & you deserve better than that.
Floater
Well-known member
This is a good idea. Some fresh produce and tomato paste will make it much easier to turn soy mince and macaroni into decent meals.
Floater
Well-known member
Knee pain persists, so I'll take things easy for a few days. I think it's some version of "runner's knee", the pain is located in the front of the knee and feels stronger when I'm going downhill and almost entirely disappears when I'm going uphill. There's also a clicking sound from the knee. But; no biggie, it always goes away eventually.
I woke up HUNGRY. Had a two-egg omelette and a protein shake, as well as spicy ramen. I'm out of eggs so those definitely go on my shopping list as well. I'm having a dilemma: I'm out of coffee, and a pack of decent coffee costs 5 euros which translates to a 10-pack of eggs, 3-pack of tuna and a bag of frozen peas, and coffee I can live without, but it's such an important part of my daily routine... Then again, when money is this tight, it would feel sensible to prioritize calories over coffee, and a 5-day break won't kill me.
I woke up HUNGRY. Had a two-egg omelette and a protein shake, as well as spicy ramen. I'm out of eggs so those definitely go on my shopping list as well. I'm having a dilemma: I'm out of coffee, and a pack of decent coffee costs 5 euros which translates to a 10-pack of eggs, 3-pack of tuna and a bag of frozen peas, and coffee I can live without, but it's such an important part of my daily routine... Then again, when money is this tight, it would feel sensible to prioritize calories over coffee, and a 5-day break won't kill me.
Floater
Well-known member
He won't be here next week, but I'm really okay. My left knee has been wonky ever since I had a running phase in my teens (tried to exercise my body to the point where I would not have looked feminine anymore) and wore the joint down. Sometimes it gets a bit mad at me when I exercise but it gets better in a couple of days. My philosophy is that the bets way of preventing bigger issues is to keep the muscles and mobility good so that there's support to the wonky joint.
Oh, another thing, I've now had a mole in my face act up for weeks - itchiness, swelling, and redness. I left an e-note of this to my health care station and they should contact me in two business days. It's on my face... Well, I'm glad I don't really mind scars (which is funny considering how anxious I get about stretch marks lol)
jayant fitter
New member
keep going ahead
Floater
Well-known member
Thank you!Couldn't agree more.
Ouch, that sounds unpleasant! Good thing you're taking care of it.
Floater
Well-known member
Feeling pretty good. I did my hair into a crazy cyberpunk hairdo and put on makeup; sometimes doing these things really helps with gender dysphoria, because I remember being a kid and seeing pictures of glam rockers and goth musicians and having a brain blast upon realizing that men can play with clothes, hair, and makeup as well. (My parents would always roll their eyes at anything but the bleakest and most conservative styles, of course.)
I'm having a Teams talk with my priest in four hours, planning to just take things easy until that, maybe clean up a bit, write a crocery list, that type of thing. I'm clearly always in a better mood a day after gym, despite being a bit sore and tired. That's motivation right there. <3
I'm having a Teams talk with my priest in four hours, planning to just take things easy until that, maybe clean up a bit, write a crocery list, that type of thing. I'm clearly always in a better mood a day after gym, despite being a bit sore and tired. That's motivation right there. <3
Floater
Well-known member
Dinner: couscous, spinach, and tuna; a little piece of cheese, two fresh tomatoes, a protein shake, one 500ml beer as a treat.
Got my grocery shopping done, I still have a couple of euros left in case of food emergencies. I got two 200g bags of frozen peas (Finnish peas, so I can thaw them and eat without heating), two big cans of tuna on sale, 1,5 kg of tomatoes, 350g of cheap Edam cheese, concentrated tomato paste, and a 10-pack carton as eggs. As well as the aforementioned beer, of course. A bit boring maybe, but everything I got goes together well with stuff I already have at home - for example, I used the tomato paste to flavor the couscous, and so on.
Feeling pretty good in general. I'll probably have an omelette before bed, I'm really hungry for protein today!
Got my grocery shopping done, I still have a couple of euros left in case of food emergencies. I got two 200g bags of frozen peas (Finnish peas, so I can thaw them and eat without heating), two big cans of tuna on sale, 1,5 kg of tomatoes, 350g of cheap Edam cheese, concentrated tomato paste, and a 10-pack carton as eggs. As well as the aforementioned beer, of course. A bit boring maybe, but everything I got goes together well with stuff I already have at home - for example, I used the tomato paste to flavor the couscous, and so on.
Feeling pretty good in general. I'll probably have an omelette before bed, I'm really hungry for protein today!
Now I´m curious: does that mean they´re a specific variety of peas or just that you trust the more local produce to not be contaminated in any way? I always use frozen peas without thawing them, should I not?
Oil is energy. Useful when food is scarce. Protein-sparing effect and all that. When I use eat things that come in oil I generally use the leftover oil to cook things with, or even on salads. Artichoke oil is delicious!
Floater
Well-known member
The latter; I was taught as a kid never to eat imported frozen veg without heating it, but it might be just an urban legend ("these and those countries irrigate crops with dirty water"). I feel a bit silly now
It could very well be true for some countries! Pretty sure peas are well-protected in their pods but something like frozen berries might be another matter. I just never thought about the possibility that frozen fruit and veg could be a biohazard. I guess I assumed that the freezing process would kill most of the bacteria that would cause food-related illness? No idea if that's true, now that I'm thinking about it.