Emily Rose: The Reboot

- Thank you so much Lingwo. I had a lovely day, I have to say.
- No candles burning today Liza, so maybe it will resolve itself... And thanks! :)

I slept till nearly 1pm today - I was so, so happy. Sometimes I feel guilty for sleeping late but I've been exceptionally tired lately and I really needed it. I also wasn't asleep till 2am last night, so it helped me get over that. I did wake up with my housemate's alarm at half 7 and went on my phone for a little bit, but I managed to get back to sleep, which was a huge relief. Planning another mega-sleep tonight, as I don't really have anything to do or anywhere to be until the evening time. God, I love my bed. I was so tired last night that I was dreaming about being asleep in my dreams. Hahaha.

I invested a cool 5 euro on a skipping rope the other day and I've started a 30-day plan I found online with that. That's how I started my day. I got up a Tabata playlist on Spotify, which, if you don't know about it, are timed interval workouts with a bad cover of some hit songs in the background. But it's really great for motivation and keeping you going. Today's goal was 3 minutes of skipping - so I did 20 seconds with a 10 second break x 9, and the track counts you in and counts you out for the break. It's fab, I really enjoyed it.

I enjoyed it so much that I was kind of sad that it was over so soon, but like the advent calendar, if I kept going, I would just ruin the whole experience. I'm going to stick to the plan. It's great to do an aerobic workout though, even if it's just a short burst like this morning. I think I will feel the benefit.

I visited my parents this afternoon and ended up having dinner with them, which was lovely. Mum had just come back from visiting her friend whose husband died 5 weeks ago. She was in good spirits. She's definitely improving. I watched Belgium vs. Croatia and really just chilled. I'm enjoying the World Cup, I must say. I'll definitely watch England vs. Senegal on Sunday. As an Irish person, I would hate if England won the whole thing. Lol. That 'It's coming home' song is one of the worst songs in existence.

That's it guys! Chat more mañana.
 
Emilyrose said:
I came home after midnight to find more candles lighting unattended in the kitchen! What should I do? My last reasonable request ended up with me being screamed at like a banshee, so not sure what approach to take. Still, I would rather say something than not. I am also contemplating just hiding all the candles and not saying anything. Haha. The ultimate passive-aggressive move.
Click to expand...
I do have to tell you that I read this while we were driving around town yesterday & laughed out loud! That is SO what I think I would do! Then I would keep a straight face when asked about them.
So glad your Mum continues to get better :)
 
Emilyrose said:
invested a cool 5 euro on a skipping rope the other day and I've started a 30-day plan I found online with that. That's how I started my day. I got up a Tabata playlist on Spotify, which, if you don't know about it, are timed interval workouts with a bad cover of some hit songs in the background. But it's really great for motivation and keeping you going. Today's goal was 3 minutes of skipping - so I did 20 seconds with a 10 second break x 9, and the track counts you in and counts you out for the break. It's fab, I really enjoyed it.
Click to expand...
Nice one! I find skipping to be such a good and intense workout. Unfortunately the last few times I notice my ankles hurting afterwards so I don't include it now, but I used to love it!
Emilyrose said:
Planning another mega-sleep tonight, as I don't really have anything to do or anywhere to be until the evening time. God, I love my bed. I was so tired last night that I was dreaming about being asleep in my dreams. Hahaha.
Click to expand...
:) Nothing like a terrific night's sleep!
 
- Thanks Cate. :)
- It's all about the sleep Liza.

I've had a very boozy few days but I got a surprise phone call today and I am playing an important tennis match tomorrow for the club, so I'm really excited for the opportunity. So it's early-to-bed for me at long last! We played this evening for an hour and a half - I thoroughly enjoyed it and I think I played quite well overall, considering I was out last night and not fresh at all. Bonus - Cute Coach was there! I played better when he was watching, hahaha.

I spent a lot of time with Mum today, which was lovely and I ate really well. I had scrambled eggs for breakfast with some bread, some pineapple, and then dinner was lamb chops with broccoli, carrot and parsnip mash, potatoes and gravy with onions. Yum yum. So at least I feel I am bringing my body back into some kind of equilibrium. The tennis was a really good workout also. I'm a bit hungry now and want to buy chocolate, but all the sugar will probably keep me awake, so I'm going to ignore the little voice and drink my water instead.

The weather has finally improved and tomorrow is meant to be a beautiful day.

I'm not going to do much else for the evening - I plan to have my eyes closed by 9pm. I hope the excitement of what's ahead tomorrow doesn't keep me awake! But I had a really good day today and that's all that matters. I just need to keep living in the moment and building on the good days. And hopefully the bad days/bad decisions will start to fade away.

I had the dentist today as well - all good with the teeth! Another blessing.
 
Emilyrose said:
We played this evening for an hour and a half - I thoroughly enjoyed it and I think I played quite well overall, considering I was out last night and not fresh at all. Bonus - Cute Coach was there! I played better when he was watching, hahaha.
Click to expand...
:) That's great you play even better when he's watching--I would probably get all nervous and play worse haha
Emilyrose said:
I am playing an important tennis match tomorrow for the club,
Click to expand...
Awesome--hope it goes well and that you have fun too!
 
How did you do at the Tennis match? If I understand the times right you should have finished or be in it now. Your tennis really impresses me, and I know it's good for you. And I suppose cute tennis coaches are a bonus, LOL.
Emilyrose said:
I spent a lot of time with Mum today, which was lovely and I ate really well. I had scrambled eggs for breakfast with some bread, some pineapple, and then dinner was lamb chops with broccoli, carrot and parsnip mash, potatoes and gravy with onions. Yum yum. So at least I feel I am bringing my body back into some kind of equilibrium.
Click to expand...
That all sounds good, both the visit with your mother and the food, good for you.
Emilyrose said:
I'm going to ignore the little voice
Click to expand...
Congrats on that, I know how hard it can be. Though sometimes my "voice" isn't so "little"...
 
- Thank you Cate.
- I loved it Liza.
- I lost Rob but I played well enough. Next time!
- Thanks Lingwo. I didn’t kill it but I was killed. ;)

I’m on my phone but I just wanted to put in a little update. I got asked out for coffee today! It’s a man that goes to our drama classes. I’ve met him quite a few times over the last few weeks and we really hit it off. Still, I’m very surprised.

I blame Paolo Nutini. I’ve been listening to his beautiful love songs non-stop the last few weeks - I am obsessed with Everywhere and Shine a Light - and it must be after raising my love vibration or something like that, lol. Damn you Paolo, you beautiful bastard.

The guy that texted - let’s call him Barry - is 51 and has kids. I don’t know what his marital status is but I guess I’ll find out. It’s just coffee anyway and I’m always saying no to things in life and I’m sick of it. I was talking to a friend last night (who at one stage looked like he was about to kiss me!!! - Paolo strikes again) and he has such a casual approach to relationships and seems to be happy out. I take it all so seriously and I’m suffering because of it.

Anyway, that’s the main event so far this week. Long day ahead tomorrow so I better get some sleep.
 
It does sound like you are sending out those love vibes. Paulo is very cute & has a lovely voice. I hope you enjoy coffee with "Barry", Em. It may be the start of a lovely friendship at the very least.
 
- Thanks Liza. I am starting to panic slightly.
- Yeah, we'll see Cate. Nervous. I'd give them all up for Paolo! :)

I feel like I have really infused the Spirit of Paolo, as I seem to be encountering a new man every day to fancy! Hahaha. I also looked really good today, for some reason. I don't know how, but it was probably the text message that gave me a little pep in my step. Anyway, man at work today who I only see every so often but who is a very nice-looking, kind of earthy guy (my age this time) was defo eyeing me up - I don't think he has ever eyed me up in his life. I could feel someone looking at me when I came into the office and I was chatting to someone else, and then I half looked over and he was there, and then he was looking at me again later on. He's very hot. He also said, 'Hi Emily' at one stage in a very casual manner, which was incredibly appealing, to be honest. He was in the storage cupboard at one point and I really felt like heading in there after him, but I held myself back. Hahaha. I'm ridiculous. All Paolo's fault.

Other than that, had a good day. I am tired again. Always tired. When will Christmas be here? 7 more days to go and I am on my 17-day break. Cannot wait!! So over work and doing stuff and getting up in the dark mornings and just trying really. I just want to relax and not feel bad about it and have time to clean my room and the house and possibly catch up with friends and chill in front of the fire at home and all that lovely stuff.

I stayed at home last night and my mum had the blanket on in my bed and the two pillows pushed down to keep them warm for me also. Aw. That's a great sign of healing - she's being a loving mother again. She still doesn't really want to hug me, which makes me sad sometimes. She was a lot more affectionate with me before. I miss that.

Dad went to his golf Christmas do today and I collected him from the pub afterwards. I felt kind of sad when I dropped him off and watched him shuffle into the house. :( I feel like he's got a very raw deal the last few years. I hope he's okay.
 
Emilyrose said:
7 more days to go and I am on my 17-day break. Cannot wait!! So over work and doing stuff and getting up in the dark mornings and just trying really. I just want to relax and not feel bad about it and have time to clean my room and the house and possibly catch up with friends and chill in front of the fire at home and all that lovely stuff.
Click to expand...
That does sound so good. Hope the next 7 days will fly by!

Emilyrose said:
I stayed at home last night and my mum had the blanket on in my bed and the two pillows pushed down to keep them warm for me also. Aw. That's a great sign of healing - she's being a loving mother again.
Click to expand...
:beating:
Emilyrose said:
feel like I have really infused the Spirit of Paolo, as I seem to be encountering a new man every day to fancy! Hahaha.
Click to expand...
Your love stuff sounds really fun! You sound in a really good space with it all :)
 
- Haha, maybe so Cate.
- Yeah, I guess I am in good form in general, Liza.

Barry texted tonight so we are meeting tomorrow at 7. I’m kind of looking forward to it now. I really don’t know what to expect with this. He’s not right on paper but we did have a good laugh the last few interactions I’ve had with him so hopefully it will be fun.

At the same time, when I was talking to him before, I wasn’t trying to be anything, so I was completely natural and relaxed. It’s different when it’s a ‘date’. Sort of like how I was all weird with the tennis coach during the lesson. Lol. I just get odd and nervous.

Another thing is that I actually don’t really enjoy talking about myself unless I am really relaxed with someone. I just find it really forced to try to churn out the story of my life. I don’t find it that interesting so far. I know that doesn’t seem to make sense since I write here most days and always find something to jabber on with, but a lot of that is deeply personal and often negative, and these are not things I want to share in general.

Anyway, I’m overthinking the whole thing. I’m just going to go and try to have fun. It’s not that big a deal! Yet!
 
Emilyrose said:
Barry texted tonight so we are meeting tomorrow at 7. I’m kind of looking forward to it now.
Click to expand...
Excellent :)
Emilyrose said:
t’s different when it’s a ‘date’. Sort of like how I was all weird with the tennis coach during the lesson. Lol. I just get odd and nervous.
Click to expand...

I find it helps me when going into nervous situations, to accept that being nervous is also ok...its just somehow helpful for me tp accept I'm nervous and not try and get rid of it--its just part of the experience...

Hope you do have fun!
 
- Thanks Cate and Liza.

Well, I survived the date! What's really funny is that I bumped into two of my closest friends over the course of the evening - one in the pub we met in and one in the late bar we ended up at. The first friend came over to me when he was leaving and even said hello to Barry. It was gas. It was great that I met them actually because we arranged a Christmas meetup next Saturday that might not have happened otherwise. I was telling Barry they are probably my two closest friends, to be honest, so it was like they were scoping him out. Haha.

Anyway, he is a very lovely man, just so easy to talk to, interesting, really funny and kind. He had me in stitches laughing with some of his stories, but he didn't hog the conversation either. It was probably the best date I was ever on. I've probably been on dates where I've been more physically attracted to the guy but in terms of personality, there's no contest really. So yeah.

There is however the age gap. He's divorced with one teenage daughter which isn't too bad. I definitely thought I saw a pic of him on Whatsapp with four kids, which has been switched to just him now, so I was kind of wondering about it, but anyway. I'm pretty sure he's telling me the truth on that one. We had a bit of a snog, which was nice, and I definitely drank too much, which was definitely not nice and I let myself down in that regard. So if I meet him again, I will suggest a walk and dinner maybe, and no drinking. I don't need it to relax anymore really, although on a first date, it definitely helps up to a point. Unfortunately, the point was long past by the time I went home.

He seems to really like me anyway, despite all my flaws, which I wasn't really trying to hide too much. He said to me at the end of the night that I was a 'real person'. I think that was a very good compliment in a way. I guess we'll see how it goes. He might change his mind this morning about the whole thing. If I'm being honest, I'd really rather end up with someone closer to my own age who doesn't have kids already. I kind of want to go through that journey with someone together. And that's the sad thing about this. But maybe I should give it a chance and just go with the flow a bit more. I would just hate to hurt him. I know I'm jumping way ahead but I know that he really wants to meet someone for a serious relationship. I just don't know if I am the right fit for that.
 
That date sounds really great! I love a person with a good sense of humor and can make me laugh!
Emilyrose said:
Emilyrose said:
I'd really rather end up with someone closer to my own age who doesn't have kids already. I kind of want to go through that journey with someone together. And that's the sad thing about this. But maybe I should give it a chance and just go with the flow a bit more.
Click to expand...
Click to expand...
I think so...it sounds like there are a lot of positives to him and I doubt anyone would ever check all of our 'ideal' boxes.
 
The date sounds lovely, Em. You could wait for the rest of your life for Mr Perfect or you could go with the flow & see what happens. He may well be your Mr Right. He may also be happy to have another child with the right person.
Emilyrose said:
Anyway, he is a very lovely man, just so easy to talk to, interesting, really funny and kind.
Click to expand...
These sound like very good character traits to me.
 
You must log in or register to reply here.
Back
Top