Cate's Diary

[liza3]

Good for you just going ahead and saying hello to the woman who has been ignoring you! I know that can be a tough move for fear of rejection (well for me anyhow!) That whole day sounds super positive. And wow to walking away from carrot cake! You sound really full on committed!

 

[Emilyrose]

That all sounds great Cate. Resisting carrot cake (I am also a big fan) and connecting with someone who hasn't been friendly previously are big wins!

 

[Cate]

That's wonderful you are able to have all these do-overs and make the club a more welcoming place for you and G each time! You're really brave in being kind and friendly toward people who have been distant to you (and even challenging to you with some of the members). That's such a wonderful thing - it's like you are giving them a heart, but verbally! That's really good news that the committee has changed for the better, and I agree - one bad apple gone can change everything for the better. And I love hearing how you got the woman who is recently widowed back into golf and are encouraging her!!

Thanks, M. I had imagined having a really unpleasant conversation with S, hearing what she didn't like about me as I had decided to ask her why she always ignored me completely & instead, we had a "normal" friendly conversation. She even came & sat next to me later in the day to talk to the woman I played with.

Oh, I forgot to ask you, we were driving past a golf course after sunset and we saw a golf ball flying through the air with a green light on it. Does that mean that night golfing is a thing? Have you ever done that? The course wasn't lit up or anything, so it was really surprising seeing a lit up golf ball flying in a lovely arc toward us!

I have never seen it played, M but it sounds like fun! They have night golf at a course about 40 km away from us but I think the course is lit up.

Well done on dodging the carrot cake!!

The woman who made it didn't notice that I didn't have any so that was a bonus

Good for you just going ahead and saying hello to the woman who has been ignoring you! I know that can be a tough move for fear of rejection (well for me anyhow!) That whole day sounds super positive. And wow to walking away from carrot cake! You sound really full on committed!

Thanks. Liza. I think I had so much rejection by her that I thought I would try one more time & then give up if it didn't work. I was in a really good mood & felt strong. It was a really good, positive day.

That all sounds great Cate. Resisting carrot cake (I am also a big fan) and connecting with someone who hasn't been friendly previously are big wins!

Thanks, Em. I love carrot cake too. It was a good day in many ways.
I also reached out to N, who has cancer in her arm. I sent her a message saying everyone at golf misses her cheery face. I also messaged T (my favourite) to see how her hand is going after her recent operation. She probably won't be back at golf for a month.
I'm off for a skin check today.

 

[Llama]

There is one woman who came back to the club this year after a long time away who ignores me completely & I have been thinking of asking her why. Today she came outside & I was the only one there. I said hi & asked her how her recent trip was & she replied enthusiastically & we had a nice conversation about it. She was friendly to me later in the day. It felt like a breakthrough.

You're going to conquer ALL the hearts of the club! Well-deserved, because you're one of the kindest, most supportive people I know. And I'm glad you're taking care of yourself as well: skin checks are uncomfortable (I hope the doctor didn't wear any stink juice at least) but so necessary. My mom had another melanoma removed last month and if she wasn't so diligent I might've lost her ten years ago.

 

[liza3]

I hope the skin check goes well--you do such a nice job of caring for yourself and getting all the checks--good for you!
That's nice too that the woman you approached came and sat next to you later--sounds like she was very grateful for the opportunity to move forward in a positive way with you--how wonderful you made that happen!

 

[Cate]

You're going to conquer ALL the hearts of the club!

"Another one bites the dust" You made me laugh, Llama! That's funny. I have been working my way around them, one by one I must admit.

Well-deserved, because you're one of the kindest, most supportive people I know. And I'm glad you're taking care of yourself as well: skin checks are uncomfortable (I hope the doctor didn't wear any stink juice at least) but so necessary. My mom had another melanoma removed last month and if she wasn't so diligent I might've lost her ten years ago.

Thank you, Llama. That's lovely of you to say. Skin checks aren't much fun but I'm so glad I have had it done. I'll be much more diligent with sunscreen from now on. I bought yet another one yesterday to try & have some on now. Rather than being greasy, it goes on more like a paste with lots of zinc in it I think. We'll see. I am going to lather on moisturiser at night & sunscreen every morning. I haven't had melanomas so far- they have all been pre-cancerous. I'm glad your Mum is diligent! The new doctor was fragrance-free & lovely. I'm booked in to see her again in two weeks where she'll have another go at my face & we're going to go over everything. I'll try to see her regularly from now on & hope she stays for a good while.

I hope the skin check goes well--you do such a nice job of caring for yourself and getting all the checks--good for you!
That's nice too that the woman you approached came and sat next to you later--sounds like she was very grateful for the opportunity to move forward in a positive way with you--how wonderful you made that happen!

Thanks, Liza. I am trying to care for myself as best I can. I can't expect anyone else to. None of us know how much time we have left & I want to live into a healthy old age if I can. Dropping at least 10 kg should help.
I doubt I will ever become friends with this woman but it felt a whole lot better than being totally ignored.
Yesterday I had a 307 deficit with basically no exercise. I'm having no trouble sticking to my calorie limit. I'll drop the calories next Monday if I haven't lost anything. We always have more than we think. I'm not weighing everything I eat & guesstimating a lot.

 

[Llama]

I think zinc oxide is the most common mineral-based (ie allergy-friendly) sunscreen. Great to hear you don't struggle with your calorie limit!

 

[Cate]

Thanks, Llama. I didn't think I would like wearing it as it looked very white when I first put it on, but then it disappeared. The only itchiness I have had is where the spots were burned off & that's to be expected. The sunscreen is a moisturizer/sunscreen by QV. It's more a sunscreen than a moisturiser. I'll use moisturiser at night every night I think & then this in the morning.
I'm having a good day today.

 

[Llama]

No sumscrenn directly on fresh spots, just a bandaid or something! If you're sensitive anyway putting it on raw skin lets more of it get into the body more so it's easier to develop intolerance. And I agree: no matther what the packaging says nothing zinc-based is moisturizing.

 

[Marsia]

I love how you are working around the obstructionist women in the golf club and getting more confident as you do. I think love is the ultimate form of healthy power, and I wonder if giving away hearts has helped you to be more courageous in your club. It's good to read the conversation on sunscreen. I hate how greasy it is, and I sweat it off first thing anyway here, so it's good to see there is a nice alternative. I agree with how tracking calories, it's so hard to remember to list everything and the correct amounts, so better to have a little deficit. So glad you're tracking again and taking such good care of yourself. I need to lose about the same amount, but I am not worrying about when it comes off, just that it slowly does.

 

[liza3]

Yesterday I had a 307 deficit with basically no exercise. I'm having no trouble sticking to my calorie limit. I'll drop the calories next Monday if I haven't lost anything. We always have more than we think. I'm not weighing everything I eat & guesstimating a lot.

Sounds like another great deficit...that is so good you aren't having trouble with sticking to the limit. I also wonder about mine as I don't weigh and measure the foods either and then exercise is just a guess by cronometer for how many calories burned...so that sounds reasonable to see if the deficit is translating to weight lost and then adjust if necessary...i may need to do that myself...however I already do have trouble sticking to my calorie limit!

 

[Cate]

No sumscrenn directly on fresh spots, just a bandaid or something! If you're sensitive anyway putting it on raw skin lets more of it get into the body more so it's easier to develop intolerance. And I agree: no matther what the packaging says nothing zinc-based is moisturizing.

The skin on my face where the spots were treated is healing well & doesn't seem to have reacted to the sunscreen at all. I'm going to lather on moisturiser twice a day as well.

I love how you are working around the obstructionist women in the golf club and getting more confident as you do. I think love is the ultimate form of healthy power, and I wonder if giving away hearts has helped you to be more courageous in your club.

I feel that making the hearts has opened up my heart even more & you may be right. I'm not going out there feeling on the defensive. It's a much better feeling. I feel like I have reset some attitudes towards me.

It's good to read the conversation on sunscreen. I hate how greasy it is, and I sweat it off first thing anyway here, so it's good to see there is a nice alternative.

I usually hate sunscreen too because of the greasiness, but I think I'll get used to this one.

I agree with how tracking calories, it's so hard to remember to list everything and the correct amounts, so better to have a little deficit. So glad you're tracking again and taking such good care of yourself. I need to lose about the same amount, but I am not worrying about when it comes off, just that it slowly does.

I feel the same. It feels so good to be back on track. I need to keep my mind focused on my health.

It is going to bucket down today & looks so miserable out there. G is heading off on his "boys" golfing trip away tonight & I am picking our granddaughter up from the airport. I'll drive her home to her mother's tomorrow morning. I hope it's not raining too heavily then.

 

[Emilyrose]

It seems to be raining everywhere in the globe at the moment. Just non-stop rain here too. I guess that's a good thing, but it makes the mood a bit glum.

I am so glad the act of making the physical hearts is opening your emotional heart up also.

 

[Cate]

It is hard to be cheery when it's raining. G is also going away for 6 nights. I had better go & have a shower & put my happy face on I want him to enjoy himself & not worry about me. He just got the fire going for me & brought lots of wood up. He never feels the cold.
I think I'll make quite a few hearts this week I snuck one in his toilet bag that he admired a week ago.

 

[Llama]

Glad to hear your face is healing well.
Sneaking your heart into G's bag for his trip is lovely I'm sure having your granddaughter visiting overnight will be a good distraction. I hope she won't be all scented up.

 

[Cate]

Thanks, Llama. I hope she is unscented too. She's usually very careful for me, but is also very forgetful.

 

[Marsia]

It's so good that you feel more like you can introduce activities in your club. I am really happy that the people there have responded to your confidence and accepted you as a positive person who adds to the good experience there. I think it could be true that we teach others how to treat us, and you being confident and friendly toward them definitely speaks volumes. I want to follow your example when I put myself out into the world again to make new friends!

It is really sweet that you put a heart into G's bag. I love hearing about your relationship with G!! I hope the rain slowed down so you had a safe drive to pick up your granddaughter, and that you're having a lovely visit now!

 

[liza3]

So sweet of G to bring in all the wood to keep you warm while he is away, and you putting a heart in his bag for him to find--you two have the loveliest marriage!
I hope the time he is away goes ok for you.

 

[Cate]

Thanks, Llama, Marsia & Liza & anyone who reads my diary & may click on like & I don't notice

It's so good that you feel more like you can introduce activities in your club. I am really happy that the people there have responded to your confidence and accepted you as a positive person who adds to the good experience there. I think it could be true that we teach others how to treat us, and you being confident and friendly toward them definitely speaks volumes. I want to follow your example when I put myself out into the world again to make new friends!

That is such a sweet thing to say, M. Thank you! That spoke to my heart & I just held my hand to it & thanked you.

It is really sweet that you put a heart into G's bag. I love hearing about your relationship with G!!

Our granddaughter told me last night that she aspires to a relationship like ours. She is so sweet. We had lots of lovely talks.

I hope the rain slowed down so you had a safe drive to pick up your granddaughter, and that you're having a lovely visit now!

I thought the heavy rain forecast might hold off until we got home, but unfortunately, it didn't. Her flight was delayed 45 minutes due to the wild weather. It was so heavy at times the wipers on full couldn't keep up & there was nowhere to pull over or if there was, the rain was so heavy I couldn't see where. There was lots of lightning that accentuated just how bleak it was. I had to concentrate on trying to see road markings. Putting my lights on full didn't help either as they made the rain look even worse. It was such a relief to get home. I drove very slowly.

So sweet of G to bring in all the wood to keep you warm while he is away, and you putting a heart in his bag for him to find--you two have the loveliest marriage!
I hope the time he is away goes ok for you.

He is such a nurturer, Liza. I'm very lucky. I always miss him when he's away, but I try not to let on.
E, my grandaughter isn't up yet. I told her that I was in no hurry to take her home today & to sleep in if she wanted to. I'll probably wait until the rain takes a break after she has had some breakfast. I think she spends a lot of time looking after her baby brother so a little more peace & quiet won't hurt.

 

[Llama]

How old is she again, 15? Somewhere around there, if I remember correctly. Definitely an age where some extra sleep and one on one attention from a caring adult are welcome.
That rainy ride home sounds miserable: I got caught in a deluge like that once and I had to stop in the middle of the road at some point because the tires lost contact with the road surface even at walking speed, I literally couldn't see the road, and there were guard rails on both sides so I couldn't get off to the side. Which was a good thing, I guess, because when the weather cleared enouch to continue there were cars in ditches everywhere. Terrifying stuff and I'm glad you got home safely.