Cate's Diary

Oh dear that's so sad Cate :(
I am glad everyone treated the dog as well as they could after he was hit and that one guy was able to contact R.
Very devastating for everyone...sending you a big hug :grouphug:
 
Thank you, Vic, Llama, Marsia, Rob & Liza :grouphug: I stayed at home yesterday & cried a lot. I have to try hard not to think about R today if I can as I am going to try to play golf. C is with him & they spent the day hugging & crying together. R loved that dog so much!
I ate stuff I shouldn't have yesterday but didn't have any alcohol. I didn't log my food.
 
Thanks, Em. I haven’t spoken to him today & he didn’t message me so I managed to play 18 holes of golf just with K & had a nice day. She’s lovely company. I think I cried myself out yesterday. R will be so heartbroken. I’m so glad that C is with him. I just rang but he didn’t answer. He will be exhausted.
 
I'm glad you got out for golf Cate and had a nice day. Good to get some good healthy friend time in I'm sure...And I'm glad R has C with him. :grouphug:
 
What Liza said: good on you for getting out there and distracting yourself with something positive and very happy R has C to cry with.
 
Thanks, Marsia. Liza & Llama. Golf did me lots of good & stopped me dwelling. R messaged me quite a few times after I had tried ringing. I had said not to bother ringing if he didn't feel like it but I was worried that he wouldn't be eating. He let me know that they had eaten some healthy food (I had sent them home with healthy cereal & lots of berries) & were about to have a veggie pizza. He hadn't eaten on Tuesday & had vomited yesterday morning. I think C is grieving as much as him. They buried O in a large wine barrel, put a plant in it & placed some of his things around it so that R could take it with him if he moved. They are going to set up a little area to sit nearby in the quiet corner of R's backyard. He felt they had got through the worst & doing this would have helped. C's dog will really miss O as they had really buddied up. They may get another dog together that will stay at C's as she will be lonely on her own again. He won't rush into getting another though I don't think.
G had an absolutely scrumptious dish cooked yesterday. He had baked a free-range chicken in spices- Chinese 5 spice, garlic, sambal oelek, lime jest, honey, soy & sherry & it was SO good & we had it with lots of veggies. I had only had veggie soup for lunch after golf (no protein) & it went down a treat.

Today I'll have a day at home, will take Arch for a walk & maybe do some gardening. I should have some green felt coming soon to make some more hearts. I also need to make some more for R but I need to learn to embroider first. One I gave R got buried along with O, between his nose & his front paw.
 
Llama said:
That made me tear up. That boy of yours knows a lot about dealing with feelings.
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alligatorob said:
Yep!
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Thanks, Llama & Rob. He sure does. Like me, he feels all of the feelings intensely. They rang last night to ask me what I thought about telling C's littlies & we had a good talk about that. I told them that I believe in telling littlies the truth & maybe it can reinforce what can happen if anyone runs out on the road, or leaves a gate open (R didn't) & is a lesson in grief & dealing with grief. If they don't tell them that he was hit by a car then down the track they will most probably hear about it & be even more upset about it & not being told the truth. I said I don't believe in talking about rainbow bridges. R's dog could not have been more loved & he did not suffer. The truth will hurt but death is so much part of life & this will help prepare them for bigger deaths one day. They are both trying to prepare for a rough night tonight. C has their favourite food prepared & expects to spend the evening in her big bed with them watching movies. She is such a good Mum.
I have taken the slip-on cover off my cart so that I can see out of it better & also lend it to the guy(D) I bought it off, rather than him tow his other cart to our course. I want him to know that I am happy for him to borrow it when I'm not playing. G & I might call in today so that I can give it a quick clean as I think he may borrow it tomorrow. It will be much better for me to be able to access my bag on the back & its pockets as I can't with the cover on.
I feel happy to share my cart now when I choose. Often someone's battery on their buggy dies & it would be good to say "Pop your bag on" & come in my cart. I will be taking my bag off after next week's game as I am travelling in someone else's buggy to another course on Saturday week. I love my cart.
G & I are doing a tip run today but don't have much else planned except for a small shop. He's playing golf tomorrow & I might drive him out & pick him up so that he can have a few drinks with D.
Edited at 5 pm.
We went to the tip & then to the golf course & I gave my cart a wash & a wipe over. We did some shopping & then after lunch I vacuumed & dusted & swept & I am exhausted. G cooked all afternoon. T has a friend over from WA & wants me to meet her tomorrow at the market & go for lunch with them. How lovely. What a special friend she has become. G is playing golf with her husband tomorrow & we'll go out there in the afternoon. I'm driving G out & picking him up anyway. What a lovely day that will be.
 
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Good to hear the cart works so well for you! Even more so when playing more often means you get to make more such wonderful friends.
 
C and R both sound lovely and yes having some nice supports around them as the kids hear what happened should really help...

Cate said:
T has a friend over from WA & wants me to meet her tomorrow at the market & go for lunch with them. How lovely. What a special friend she has become. G is playing golf with her husband tomorrow & we'll go out there in the afternoon. I'm driving G out & picking him up anyway. What a lovely day that will be.
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Excellent! That's so nice to connect more and more with a new friend!
 
Do you keep your cart at the golf course, or at home? Some places in the US it's legal to drive them on streets so people use them for a lot of things, not just golf.
Cate said:
G & I are doing a tip run today
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I am guessing that's your dump or landfill? We use the term tippage for the amount you have to pay to use a dump.
 
Cate said:
T has a friend over form WA & wants me to meet her tomorrow at the market & go for lunch with them. How lovely. What a special friend she has become. G is playing golf with her husband tomorrow & we'll go out there in the afternoon. I'm driving G out & picking him up anyway. What a lovely day that will be.
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Aw, I hope you enjoyed it Cate.

I agree with the advice you gave about the dog. Just tell them the truth. A certain part of life is all about death, unfortunately.
 
Thanks, Llama, Liza, Rob & Em. My cart really has enabled me to play golf a lot more often & to not feel so exhausted after a game. I can save the energy for my shots. I still try to walk a fair bit & park well away from the ball, especially when it's wet. I don't want to cause any damage to the course.
Rob, we do call the dump or landfill/recycling centre the tip. It has always been the tip in Australia as far as I know. My cart stays at the course as I have never towed anything in my life & I don't feel like starting now.
T has become such a good friend. I was thrilled to be asked to join her & her friend. I think I still suffer from a lack of self-confidence. I know I do. T makes me laugh so much. She has the best attitude towards life! If I was being really truthful I would admit that I am surprised when women actually really like me & maybe put up a protective barrier against hurt. I will try not to delete that sentence.
R & C told the littlies last night & poor R had to cope with some gruesome questions from little L. H reacted how they expected & was very upset. I had a chat with her. I don't think L has processed it yet. He's a funny little fellow. Everyone deals with death differently. I said to R that he may well have asked similar questions at the age of 6. C's dog was very confused when R turned up without his dog. She adored him. He was her protector.
 
Aw, so heartbreaking for R and C to tell the kids but I think one tough conversation like that is far better in the long run. My mum tried to hide certain things from me when I was younger and oftentimes, I would hear about them from someone else, which was always a shock and far worse.

So glad you had a great day with T and co. I totally understand what you mean. I think if you've had a few negative experiences with some of the more aggressive women out there, it can scar you a bit. Glad you've overcome it and found a new friend.
 
I agree Em. My Mum tried hiding things from me too & I don't think it did me any good at all. You don't learn to deal with grief unless you grieve. I got talked out of going to my brother's funeral when he committed suicide & I never really came to terms with his death.
I had a really lovely day with T & her friend & I'm really flattered that I was included in their day. I met them at the market & we spent ages there. I bought a few presents, including R's Christmas present. Archie had a ball & met lots of cute dogs & I met some lovely owners, one in particular who I'm sure I'll meet again. I feel so much more open to making new friends. T is such a good friend. Today she told her old friend that when she first met me she felt like she had known me all her life. We had lots and lots of laughs today. We went back out to the golf club afterwards & spent some time out there & G & I have just got home.
I had a lovely day.
 
Sounds like such a lovely day out. That's so great that your friendship with T is opening you up to other friend possibilities too and maybe building your self-confidence as well. You sound like such a great person so I imagine a lot of people would love to call you their friend!
Laughing with people is just the best and so fun when you find someone that shares your sense of humor!
 
Thanks, Liza. I think T has given me some self-confidence & I do feel so much more open to friendship. She is so upfront & honest & sees through the BS. She jumps on me instantly if I sound negative about myself. We do share the same whacky sense of humour. I am trying to see myself as she sees me. Thank you so much for your lovely compliment, Liza. I am not very good at accepting compliments. I am trying.
I think I need to make some more hearts today. It's looking rainy again & is fairly chilly.
 
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