San I would advise you to go to Zumba and find a comfortable fit gym for you.
I know before I dropped my local gym due to financial reasons I opted to go in the mornings. In the mornings was a smorgesboard (did i spell that right
) of sizes, fitness levels and ages, and at that time walking around the gym was not a hassle for me, for although let's just say I was 300lbs (I know it was more, but that's my story and I'm sticking to it
), everyone there was into their own thing and no one was looking around, most of the gym goers were in ratty or loose shirts or undershirts, tights, cotton pants, the like, let's just say very few of us would have made it into a fitness magazine the way we were dressed.
Now the evenings were different, it was as though you were on a fitness runway, and some women even came in makeup
this I never got. But the instructors I must say treated everyone different, they came on the side of you when it looked like you were struggling and talked quietly to you, gave you encouragement, well everyone except Mr. X, he did not care what your size was, when he said 'push it' he meant 'PUSH IT'
being overweight or out of shape was not taken as an excuse for not pushing yourself in his class.
I also found that I pushed myself harder when I was surrounded by other people, I would look around the class, pick out a random person who was smaller than me, or maybe my size and say to myself, "If he/she don't stop, I won't stop" and it actually works. I am thinking of going back to the gym starting next month, so I could 'push myself' a bit more
.
I know the self-consciousness I felt, but I made up my mind that I was there for myself and no one else, and it actually worked... so I know it will work for you.