Floater's diary

I have 2 bananas packed in my golf bag for lunch today. I find eggs & avocado on toast are also very kind to my stomach. I hope you have something nice planned for the weekend, Arvo. Please give Heikki a little scratch under the chin for me xo
 
Cate said:
I have 2 bananas packed in my golf bag for lunch today. I find eggs & avocado on toast are also very kind to my stomach. I hope you have something nice planned for the weekend, Arvo. Please give Heikki a little scratch under the chin for me xo
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I do, I'm going on a date in two hours! Chinc scritchies will be delivered :)
 
Oh right breakfast was a banana and four Brazil nuts, heading out to the date now with my hair on fleek and I even tried to shave my legs with less than perfect results but hey 😆

Oh right i need to put value on my travel card!
 
The date was great!! We had bowls at a ramen place, then walked for a bit and went to a bar for vichy and coke. He also doesn´t drink which is a plus for me. We held hands and kissed. It didn´t make me feel stressed out at all. He isn´t very informed about trans stuff but I´m not too worried about it, my body situation is what it is and I´ll make it work, especially as he was very respectful and kind. I also think he´s a cutie. He moved to Finland from China when he was four so he´s lived his whole life here. He has the prettiest eyes and a very pleasant, friendly, honest face. And he plays a lot of ball sports and promised to take me play some day. He said that he likes to pamper his partners, and I have absolutely nothing against it. He said that some people have a hard time accepting it. And he´s not vain or a braggard. To me it´s a good sign that he has money but still looks for deals and doesn´t just sow his money everywhere, as the latter is often a sign of overcompensating some fault or other.

I know it sounds quick but we are planning to meet again tomorrow. We´ll go grocery shopping and I´ll make him lunch at home. He´ll get to meet Heikki as well :)
 
Oh right, at home I had a banana and some soup and now I´ll have some chicken and if I´m still hungry after that, more soup (EDIT I did have more soup - self care game is getting back on track <3)
 
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He sounds like a good person, Arvo. I'm sure you will get to know him well before making any long-term plans with him. I like hearing that your self-care "game" is in full swing xoxo
 
Cate said:
He sounds like a good person, Arvo. I'm sure you will get to know him well before making any long-term plans with him. I like hearing that your self-care "game" is in full swing xoxo
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Of course, I'm too old to uproot my life for wishful thinking! Especially as we have a big difference in income, I need to be smart about it.
 
Today was good! I woke up, did some cleaning, picked the guy up, we went grocery shopping and I made chicken soup and we had a nice time.

As always, I get nervous about social interaction...! But it´s just overthinking. I had a great time.
 
Cate said:
I love that you had a great time 🥰
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I really needed something positive in my life. Even if this thing doesn't develop into a relationship, I feel considerably less damaged after spending time with someone who doesn't see me as a fixable problem. Mostly interacting with healthcare workers tends to have that effect on my self perception. I'm as weird and cringe as ever but he doesn't mind. And he doesn't understand anything about trans stuff but he calls me Arvo and that feels nice. He doesn't have to know and understand every little thing because he's cute and respectful and I like his company.
 
I had a banana and my meds at 6AM after a sleepless night. Dozed off after that and slept until noon. Now having lunch: store-bought soup, a banana, the rest of the ham I bought yesterday.
 
Ok the guy is starting to look better and better. I had a small PTSD break from reality and he handled it like a champ and we talked it out and it didn't diminish his attraction to me. And it was SANE. He might actually be able to handle my level of mental illness.
 
Can't sleep so I just took my meds and will start my day. A banana, beef jerky, store-bought soup, and half a bag of dried mango.
 
Had a little nap and went for a walk with Ms Civilian Friend; got a cheeseburger and Red Bull for lunch. Will rest for 60 mins and head to the swimming pool for my first aqua jogging session of the autumn season
 
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