Floater's diary

Oh shoot, I just realized I haven't eaten today. But I did clean up and have a lovely walk. I have some steak in the fridge, that's going to be my belated breakfast, and I'll make ramen with corn and enoki mushrooms in the evening!
 
I hope some food made it into your body by now. You matter and your body needs nourishment just as much as your soul.
 
Please try to eat decently tomorrow, Floater. I was giving Archie a scratch behind the ears this morning before I got up & I said here's a good "scritch" from Floater too. Archie wants you to have a healthy eating day. He has now had his breakfast & so have I.
 
Cate said:
Please try to eat decently tomorrow, Floater. I was giving Archie a scratch behind the ears this morning before I got up & I said here's a good "scritch" from Floater too. Archie wants you to have a healthy eating day. He has now had his breakfast & so have I.
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I'll do my best. I threw up in the morning. Got trans clinic stuff today. I left a request for anxiety meds for my health care provider... Those usually help me eat.
 
Choking down two flatbreads with cheese & marg. My strawberries hid a nasty surprise: there were moldy ones in the box, so I had to throw out half of the box.
 
The clinic stuff was OK, my stress levels dropped afterwards. I'm making lunch: strawberries and tomato eggdrop soup with enoki mushrooms.

Edit: my teeth hurt like hell, probably from clenching my jaws. Makes eating a very unpleasant task. I hope I'll get the sedatives soon, they help with that
 
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I'm glad you found something that you could get down. Avocadoes are one of my standbys & cheese & I just love Brazil nuts. I haven't had any for ages.
I'm glad the clinic was ok, but hope you can find a way to relax. Teeth clenching is awful. I do that too occasionally & was thinking of getting a tooth guard to wear overnight when I find I'm doing it.
Floater, is there a dog pound not far from where you live? They are usually keen to have volunteer dog walkers. It's just a thought. Have you heard back about the dog you enquired about?
 
Cate said:
Floater, is there a dog pound not far from where you live? They are usually keen to have volunteer dog walkers. It's just a thought. Have you heard back about the dog you enquired about?
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No, and no. But it´s usual that they take over a month to process the applications. And I couldn't be bothered to get attached to a dog I wouldn't be able to keep anyway, so it's probably best I don't try to apply as a volunteer, it would be way too stressful for my autistic brain. The shelter is 2 hours away via public transport.

I couldn't imagine sleeping with a mouth guard. Luckily I don't grind. It´s temporary unpleasantness related to having a human body.

I have managed to unwind today by bingeing a lovely anime called "Ranking of Kings". I just think that not every worry or ache needs to be treated immediately. Buddhists are very correct in the belief that life inevitably contains suffering. It will usually pass sooner with less fretting and trying to fix things, IMHO. I did my best by refilling my sedative prescription, might take a couple of weeks to get it renewed but it will help with the muscle tension. And I would be a cold hearted asshole if I didn't mourn with my whole heart, brain and body. It's a respect thing.
 
I'm not sure I could sleep with a mouthguard either.
Floater said:
And I would be a cold hearted asshole if I didn't mourn with my whole heart, brain and body. It's a respect thing.
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I understand that respect. It took almost a year & a half before I considered getting another dog after Sophie. I needed to grieve & decided not to get another dog & then one day I knew I really needed another dog. I don't think I could volunteer in a dogs home either. I would want to take them all home!
 
Breakfast: two flatbreads with marg and week-old Turkish yogurt. Sounds gross but I'm broke and sour milk products should stay safe for a while after the best before date.
 
Lunch: noodles with two boiled eggs, wilted spinach, king oyster mushrooms, and cilantro. Eggs & spinach were both past date, but the spinach bag was unopened and the eggs didn't float. I'm happy they didn't go to waste.

I'll shell and marinate the remaining eggs in a mixture of soy sauce, chili sauce, oil, pepper and cilantro, that way they'll keep good for three to four days and be good with noodles, salads, rice or plain.
 
Ok interesting, and great: I have an appetite. I'll cook/prep some more soon. I have decided to use today for chores, resting and nesting and so far it's going good. Took my meds in the morning.

EDIT: about to see if an unopened pack of Castello Blue is still edible half a month past date. AFAIK blues keep well so unless it has grown black mold or the texture has gotten slimy, it should be safe.

EDIT2: tastes mild and fresh. It's gotten firmer than usual so the packaging hasn't retained moisture too well, but I'm so glad I avoided waste. Having half a package with some red bell pepper for a snack. I feel happy: usually I'm too timid about food and treat the "best before" as Word of God, and I HATE food waste.
 
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Continuing my fridge&freezer cleanup meals: I found a bag of quinoa+veg mix in the freezer, it's three month past date and does taste blander than in June when I bought it, but I'm having half of it now with onions, corn, walnuts and black pepper, and the rest later on. I'm just relieved I don't have to leave my home... Except maybe later to take the trash out. I'm so tired.
 
Cate said:
I look at "use by"s as "best before" & usually ignore them anyway. I'm glad you have your hunger back & hope you get a good night's sleep xo
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Thanks! I did get the runs on my evening walk, but that was probably stress related. Thank goodness I was in the woods. I also maybe saw wolf tracks?! There are occasional young wolves crossing through while seeking for a pack in the area. The shape was wider than a dog's paw, longer toes, snow shoe style, and HUGE strides that formed a precise single line. Would be nice to see a wolf some day!

Take care Cate!
 
Woke up at 3:30 and couldn't sleep, so I just got up (5:30) and had two flatbreads and sauerkraut. Hopefully I'll fall asleep again...
 
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