Emily Rose: The Reboot
- Thread starter Emilyrose
- Start date
Thanks guys, I hope so.
I haven't gone into work the last few days. I'm just not feeling up to it, I'm not really sure why. I think I am just a bit frustrated with everything and just giving myself a break. It's probably not a good thing but I just can't face it right now. I'll have to go back tomorrow but it will be a short week.
I did a weights class last night, I've made some serious progress. That was very encouraging.
I had a cake and coffee for breakfast but I'm going to have veggie soup for lunch and salmon, veg and potatoes for dinner, so it's not a complete disaster.
I think my main issue at the moment is wanting to be at a different place in my life than I am. I seem to have lost a bit of faith and I need to get it back. At least I've made the exercise non-negotiable, so that's something. Maybe it's just the end of the year looming and despondency over another year that didn't really go anywhere.
Anyway, I'm sure I'll get that self-belief back.
I haven't gone into work the last few days. I'm just not feeling up to it, I'm not really sure why. I think I am just a bit frustrated with everything and just giving myself a break. It's probably not a good thing but I just can't face it right now. I'll have to go back tomorrow but it will be a short week.
I did a weights class last night, I've made some serious progress. That was very encouraging.
I had a cake and coffee for breakfast but I'm going to have veggie soup for lunch and salmon, veg and potatoes for dinner, so it's not a complete disaster.
I think my main issue at the moment is wanting to be at a different place in my life than I am. I seem to have lost a bit of faith and I need to get it back. At least I've made the exercise non-negotiable, so that's something. Maybe it's just the end of the year looming and despondency over another year that didn't really go anywhere.
Anyway, I'm sure I'll get that self-belief back.
Thanks Brawny. I went to the gym yesterday - it helped.
One of the girls at work asked me today if I'm thinking of leaving. My sick days did not go unnoticed and the boss wants to talk to me tomorrow. I really hope it goes well, as in, I get a gigantic pay rise. They know that's my main beef, but I have a few other things I may as well bring up and try to get everything sorted out for next year. I guess this is a good thing, wish me luck! I'm nervous.
Not a bad day overall, going to make myself go for a run when I get home and get into a winning mindset.
One of the girls at work asked me today if I'm thinking of leaving. My sick days did not go unnoticed and the boss wants to talk to me tomorrow. I really hope it goes well, as in, I get a gigantic pay rise. They know that's my main beef, but I have a few other things I may as well bring up and try to get everything sorted out for next year. I guess this is a good thing, wish me luck! I'm nervous.
Not a bad day overall, going to make myself go for a run when I get home and get into a winning mindset.
Thanks guys. It went ok, I will know more in January. I got a little Christmas bonus anyway, so that's something.
I'm gone completely off track with food and didn't exercise last night but I'm struggling a little bit right now. I think with the Christmas break and new year to focus on, I should start to do better. My friend was just interviewed on the radio, talking about how close to was to giving up on her music career, and all of a sudden things started happening for her, so if it can happen for her, it can happen for me.
I think overall, I didn't have a great year, so I guess I'm processing that fact and it's a bit upsetting.
I'm gone completely off track with food and didn't exercise last night but I'm struggling a little bit right now. I think with the Christmas break and new year to focus on, I should start to do better. My friend was just interviewed on the radio, talking about how close to was to giving up on her music career, and all of a sudden things started happening for her, so if it can happen for her, it can happen for me.
I think overall, I didn't have a great year, so I guess I'm processing that fact and it's a bit upsetting.
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Cate
Long term member
Emily, this is the time of year when I think most of us reflect on where we are in our lives & what we would like to change. I feel that this has been one of my worst years, but I am going to really think how I can change the things in my life to make it better. I will try to concentrate on the good things, the good people in my life, the things I love doing etc. I know that I need less pressure, not more. You may cope well with all of this striving, but I know I don't. Try to enjoy your life Em. Look after yourself xoxo
Thank you Cate.
I've been watching some YouTube videos on quitting smoking tonight and that turned into looking at videos on quitting drinking and I've decided to do both. I have thought about this so many times but always got myself into a panic wondering how I can possibly get through the day/week/Christmas without them. I don't really feel that way anymore. They are adding nothing to my life whatsoever.
The drinking thing will potentially make my social life a little bit different, but it's not like I can't meet up with friends or go to parties, I just won't be drinking when I do. I've made a lot of stupid decisions because of drinking and I just think it's time.
I'm finally in a place where my food and exercise are under control, but then I have drinks on a Friday night and I want fast food to help with the hangover and I'm too drained to do any exercise. I'm also really sick of constantly worrying about my health, my gums, my circulation, my skin, my weight and all the things that are affected by this two-headed monster of an addiction.
I have to start believing in myself more. These things don't make a hard day get any easier, they just extend the hard day into another hard day. Why would I want to do this to myself?
I also think my productivity will go through the roof, I'll have so much more time to do the things I love and so much more money.
I've realised that I just don't get as much out of the social scene as I used to, I don't really like pub life anymore. I want to go to more plays, go on dinner dates, go surfing, go for hikes, write short stories, play my guitar, and all the other hundreds of options that don't require alcohol or cigarettes whatsoever.
Anyway, this is what I want. I'm going to have a baptismal shower now and get back into the flow of life and make it a great one.
I've been watching some YouTube videos on quitting smoking tonight and that turned into looking at videos on quitting drinking and I've decided to do both. I have thought about this so many times but always got myself into a panic wondering how I can possibly get through the day/week/Christmas without them. I don't really feel that way anymore. They are adding nothing to my life whatsoever.
The drinking thing will potentially make my social life a little bit different, but it's not like I can't meet up with friends or go to parties, I just won't be drinking when I do. I've made a lot of stupid decisions because of drinking and I just think it's time.
I'm finally in a place where my food and exercise are under control, but then I have drinks on a Friday night and I want fast food to help with the hangover and I'm too drained to do any exercise. I'm also really sick of constantly worrying about my health, my gums, my circulation, my skin, my weight and all the things that are affected by this two-headed monster of an addiction.
I have to start believing in myself more. These things don't make a hard day get any easier, they just extend the hard day into another hard day. Why would I want to do this to myself?
I also think my productivity will go through the roof, I'll have so much more time to do the things I love and so much more money.
I've realised that I just don't get as much out of the social scene as I used to, I don't really like pub life anymore. I want to go to more plays, go on dinner dates, go surfing, go for hikes, write short stories, play my guitar, and all the other hundreds of options that don't require alcohol or cigarettes whatsoever.
Anyway, this is what I want. I'm going to have a baptismal shower now and get back into the flow of life and make it a great one.
Short-term relief of tension. But seeing
I think you can definitely get used to finding that relief elsewhere. It won´t be easy, especially at first, but just like you´ve got into new habits with food and exercise you can also do it with alcohol and tobacco. I´m definitely rooting for you!
Thanks LaMa.
Oh, absolutely Brawny!
I went to a yoga class this evening and afterwards the teacher wished me a happy Christmas and gave me a hug. It was so nice. I like warm hugs.
I threw my weighing scales away yesterday, sick of basing my whole day on what number I am. It's so silly anyway, you just have to look in the mirror or try on some clothes to know how your body is doing. (I have two more visits with the nutritionist where I will be weighed, so that will be the 'proof' of success, but it won't be an ongoing thing.)
I didn't put too much pressure on myself with food or giving up smoking today, there are just too many parties before the New Year (I know, excuses, excuses), but I am going to keep up the exercise and making healthy meals until then, and then do Dry January and get back on target.
Just 4 more days of work to go, cannot wait to escape for 10 whole days.
Oh, absolutely Brawny!
I went to a yoga class this evening and afterwards the teacher wished me a happy Christmas and gave me a hug. It was so nice. I like warm hugs.
I threw my weighing scales away yesterday, sick of basing my whole day on what number I am. It's so silly anyway, you just have to look in the mirror or try on some clothes to know how your body is doing. (I have two more visits with the nutritionist where I will be weighed, so that will be the 'proof' of success, but it won't be an ongoing thing.)
I didn't put too much pressure on myself with food or giving up smoking today, there are just too many parties before the New Year (I know, excuses, excuses), but I am going to keep up the exercise and making healthy meals until then, and then do Dry January and get back on target.
Just 4 more days of work to go, cannot wait to escape for 10 whole days.
Aw, thanks Cate.
I read a really interesting article about stress and exhaustion in the 21st century due to people killing themselves with work to have a nice house, holidays and lifestyle for themselves and their families, and it really sounds like somewhere along the way, we've just gone wrong.
I have been feeling really ran down this week and have a massive cold sore to prove it, and I'm suddenly thinking to myself, 'Why am I putting myself under so much pressure and stress to prove myself at work, or to my friends, or to myself? It's only making me sick and tired.'
So I'm going to try to recapture some of that laid back attitude I developed when I wasn't working, forget about earning more money, forget about getting to the next step, and just concentrate on being relaxed and happy and healthy and really savouring the good parts of each day.
The good parts of today:
I was invited to not one but two events tomorrow by different groups of friends. Not any of the friends that I have been complaining about on here but completely different ones. And I realised that I am not alone and I have the potential to make new friends all the time. And I have! Even though I haven't really been what I would consider a great version of myself lately. So that was a lovely realisation. I don't need to cling on to people anymore. I'll be fine.
I'm actually really excited about the new year, I think it's going to bring great things my way. And without all the striving. My mother is in great form at the moment so time at home with her will be very encouraging also and good for the soul.
Going to chill out now with some OUAT (season 4) and get some early snooze in.
I read a really interesting article about stress and exhaustion in the 21st century due to people killing themselves with work to have a nice house, holidays and lifestyle for themselves and their families, and it really sounds like somewhere along the way, we've just gone wrong.
I have been feeling really ran down this week and have a massive cold sore to prove it, and I'm suddenly thinking to myself, 'Why am I putting myself under so much pressure and stress to prove myself at work, or to my friends, or to myself? It's only making me sick and tired.'
So I'm going to try to recapture some of that laid back attitude I developed when I wasn't working, forget about earning more money, forget about getting to the next step, and just concentrate on being relaxed and happy and healthy and really savouring the good parts of each day.
The good parts of today:
I was invited to not one but two events tomorrow by different groups of friends. Not any of the friends that I have been complaining about on here but completely different ones. And I realised that I am not alone and I have the potential to make new friends all the time. And I have! Even though I haven't really been what I would consider a great version of myself lately. So that was a lovely realisation. I don't need to cling on to people anymore. I'll be fine.
I'm actually really excited about the new year, I think it's going to bring great things my way. And without all the striving. My mother is in great form at the moment so time at home with her will be very encouraging also and good for the soul.
Going to chill out now with some OUAT (season 4) and get some early snooze in.
Cate
Long term member
Good thinking Em. How about incorporating an abbreviated version of that into your signature to remind yourself.
"I am going to be laid-back, relaxed, happy & healthy & savour the good parts of every day."
Cate
Long term member
Em, I was just futzing around on Facebook & came across an interesting blog shared by a friend of mine, who is a Psychologist. She often shares interesting articles. I found this very interesting & thought you might too. I actually met this friend via the forum. She visited me many years ago. Here is the link- https://anniewrightpsychotherapy.com/what-if-i-never-meet-the-one/ xoC
And at the same time you hear folks complain about "Millennials" refusing to give up everything for their jobs. Seriously. Smfh.
Awesome!
Thanks for the article Cate. I don't really believe I'll be single forever but I probably need to be for right now.
Yeah LaMa, I personally think a job is a job, unless it's a vocation or you turn your hobby into a career. Then it's worth the effort. I want to get some job satisfaction but it's not going to be the only thing in my life.
I had a fun night out with the girls from the office last night, they are really cool. We've really bonded in the runup to Christmas, it's been fantastic. I just need to get through one more day and then a trip to the dentist that is filling me with dread because I know my gums are not great at the moment, but then I'm free. Going to get the best sleep of my life tomorrow night, go for a run and do the last of my shopping on Saturday and pretty much hibernate until the big meet up with friends on the 28th.
I saw a picture of myself taken about a month ago today and I did not like what I saw. I have to stop kidding myself and have a controlled Christmas foodwise. It should be ok.
Yeah LaMa, I personally think a job is a job, unless it's a vocation or you turn your hobby into a career. Then it's worth the effort. I want to get some job satisfaction but it's not going to be the only thing in my life.
I had a fun night out with the girls from the office last night, they are really cool. We've really bonded in the runup to Christmas, it's been fantastic. I just need to get through one more day and then a trip to the dentist that is filling me with dread because I know my gums are not great at the moment, but then I'm free. Going to get the best sleep of my life tomorrow night, go for a run and do the last of my shopping on Saturday and pretty much hibernate until the big meet up with friends on the 28th.
I saw a picture of myself taken about a month ago today and I did not like what I saw. I have to stop kidding myself and have a controlled Christmas foodwise. It should be ok.