Cate's Diary

I forget birthdays all the time, especially now that the pandemic makes me lose track of time. I understand the underlying worry in your case though: it's probably a good thing he's going to see his doctor anyway.
 
Do you forget your Mum or Dad’s though?
I think he’s madly juggling lots of balls at the moment. I can’t help but worry about him I’m afraid. I try not to add any stress to his life.
 
For some reason I seem to find birthdays more important than most people I know. We’re all so different. If I wake during the night on my birthday I’ll silently wish myself happy birthday.
 
LaMaria said:
I think that's lovely! I'm not that into birthdays but wishing yourself well is a lovely habit.
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I think so too, LaMa. We should wish ourselves well. No one else can look after us as much as we can ourselves.
Emilyrose said:
Sorry I am so late with the birthday wishes Cate! Happy birthday and I hope you have a wonderful year ahead. x
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Thanks, Em. I hope you have a wonderful year ahead too. I think you will!
 
Looks like I missed your birthday too! I am not so good with birthdays, and don't like much fuss about mine either, not since I was a teenager anyway.
 
Thanks, Rob. I’m not sure why, but I feel that your birthday is your special day. I’m happy to have had another one. Let’s hope we have many more :)
 
Thanks, Rob :)

Saturday, the 22nd of May, 2021.
I am going to lose 5kg by the 22nd of October.
Yesterday I walked 6.4 km & at a guess had about 1800 cals.
BF this morning- Greek yoghurt with rhubarb, 1 slice canteloupe & 1 piece of toast (1/2 PB, 1/2 vegemite)
Lunch will be a tuna & avo salad, followed by some fresh fruit.
Dinner will be 2 small lamb chops with lots of veggies.
Total 1150

We had a really nice evening last night with D & the 2 GK's. Hopefully, they are going to stay here once a fortnight for the night & D will spend the next day with them, taking them on an adventure. It has been a rocky year with them & they need one another. It was lovely hearing them laugh so much last night. G is off to golf now & the rest are still asleep.
 
Your food sounds delicious! Very glad to hear you had a good time with the family, too, after the stressful times.
 
Thanks, LaMa xoxo
I have felt angry this afternoon & anger does not suit me well. I'm not sure why I got so angry. I worry about R all of the time. He includes me in almost all of his troubles & then I find out on Facebook that he is on his way to Queensland to get more tattoos. Sometimes I wish he told me nothing & then other times I wish he told me everything. It's not easy being a parent. I got a lot of my anger out by walking my dog & rearranging the furniture in his cabin so that when we get the call to say the truck is coming to pick it up at least it will be ready. Last time we had to come home in a hurry early from our trip to the beach & when it ended up on his block everything blocked the door & the windows had to be removed with an angle grinder. I'll be glad when he gets his block levelled out & takes this second cabin. I was hoping that would be this weekend. I have it almost ready & lifted too much, but stopped at a very heavy sheet of tiles.
OK. I have got rid of some of my frustrations. I really don't like how he rants & raves sometimes, especially on social media. He is obviously not very stable at the moment & it scares me a bit.
Lunch didn't end up being a tuna salad as I was ravenous & cold & I ended up having eggs, 1/4 avocado, 2 small mushrooms & garlic on toast.
I'm currently having a piccolo of bubbly. I actually felt like some bloody whisky. ..........& grumpy!
 
I think it's totally understandable that these things make you angry/frustrated/anxious. Glad you found something to focus all that energy on :grouphug:
 
Thanks, LaMa xo
I feel a lot better this morning & have decided to try to develop a protective barrier around my emotions. My doctor once suggested placing everyone else's problems into a rubbish bin without a bottom & letting them all fall away. I might try imagining that. My Mum seemed to have the knack. I think that you had a saying, LaMa, that involved birds & watching them flap away.
 
Your goal of losing 5kg by October 22 sounds quite doable. Just keep after it!

Sorry you are angry, but getting it out has to help. Probably the best therapy. I like your therapist's advice, worrying doesn't help does it?
 
Thanks, Rob. I shouldn't let things get to me so much & worrying sure doesn't help one little bit. I'll watch that video later today. G is reading & Arch is snoozing xo
 
I admire you being a mum, Cate. The thought of parenting scares me. I know what I put my mum through as a teen and my sister is a constant worry for the family too (she's unstable and will likely not go to therapy). But whatever it is, I'm sure you call pull through.

Also, I totally second that you can lose 5kg by Oct, likely even much sooner!! =)
 
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