Cate's Diary

I don't like ordering clothes online either. They always change material or fit or something and sending stuff back is a bother. Enjoy your home day!
 
Thanks, Em. I really do feel motivated to play golf now & will focus on getting fitter, rather than on my weight for now. I remembered that I also have a white pair of capris that I can wear to golf if I need to. They will probably look nicer than the black ones as they are a nicer cut. I had better keep looking at shoes. I gave up this morning. I think I do need to try them on first.
I have had a very productive day today & got lots done- washed G's car, dishes, sorting out washing, rearranging, walking Archie, dishes, cooking chicken, made a big salad for lunch, ironing......rang a friend.....
I might have another look online for golf shoes. I got a $10 off my next purchase voucher from the local golf shop so I'll see what they have.

Thanks, Llama (you just posted)
I don't think I'll order anything online as it is such a bother returning stuff. I do know my shoe size with a couple of different golf shoes though & will see what's available.
I'm having a good day today :)
 
Cate said:
I got a $10 off my next purchase voucher from the local golf shop so I'll see what they have.
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:p That's how they get you. But supporting local businesses over the online giants with horrifying employee treatment is a good thing anyway.
 
Cate said:
have had a very productive day today & got lots done- washed G's car, dishes, sorting out washing, rearranging, walking Archie, dishes, cooking chicken, made a big salad for lunch, ironing......rang a friend.....
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oh that does sound very productive! Good for you!
Good luck with finding the perfect golf outfit....sounds kind of exciting and fun the whole thing--playing in the tournament, finding the perfect outfit...good you signed up!
 
Llama said:
:p That's how they get you. But supporting local businesses over the online giants with horrifying employee treatment is a good thing anyway.
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It doesn't normally work for me as I have usually bought what I needed & that's when they send the voucher. It expires at the end of the month that they send it so usually it ends up in the recycling box.
liza3 said:
oh that does sound very productive! Good for you!
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Thanks, Liza. It was a good day.
liza3 said:
Good luck with finding the perfect golf outfit....sounds kind of exciting and fun the whole thing--playing in the tournament, finding the perfect outfit...good you signed up!
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Finding the shoes will be somewhat harder I think. I'm glad I signed up too, but have had some moments of self-doubt. Stuff like that makes me very nervous. I am feeling really nervous(?) about going out first thing today with the women. I would rather just play golf without being in their comp. I'm definitely not staying afterwards.
 
Hope you enjoyed. The ones who matter don't mind whatever your insecurities are and the one who mind don't matter.
 
Thanks, Blue, Em, Liza & Llama.
I enjoyed the day & felt quite comfortable after a short while. I asked the captain (B1) if she minded me playing along with a couple of the women, without entering the comp & she was pleasant & polite & said that was fine. I made it clear that I was mindful of her preference. I have made a decision to wipe the slate clean & start over. I'm not getting tangled up again. When T arrived I chatted with her & then when K arrived I asked her if she wanted to play with T & I, letting them know that I wouldn't be finishing the round & only playing 9. It's much better for the others if they don't have to worry about doing your card & then swapping when you drop out. A came & joined us too, so there were 4 in the group. They usually only play with 3. I was hitting my drives really well & putting well & after 9 I decided I could go another 3, which would end near the clubhouse. I'm glad I went that extra 3, but my feet were hurting by then. I was really happy with my golf, with pushing myself a little further & the social aspect.

It was good to finish up at 12.30. I sat & ate my mason jar muesli/yoghurt/fruit concoction, had a diet ginger beer & then went back into town & did a little shop at the wholefoods place. When I got home I put my feet up & read. Later I took Archie for a pretty good walk & visited an elderly, grouchy woman who has a yappy toy poodle. She never takes it anywhere & it is very nervous. Arch isn't fazed by the constant barking. I'm glad I visited, but I sincerely hope I'm not that grumpy if I get to her age.

I loved the Resilience book. It was a really interesting read, more so for Australians, I think because of the sporting references.
GEM. (Gratitude, Empathy & Mindfulness. I think I'll look into it further.
 
Lunch did go well thanks, Em. I am always glad when they're over though. I got a bit miffed at one of G's sisters as we had been given an old photo of their Dad which we already had & none of them had a copy. I knew we had some more so I got out the box with our collection of things from the pub & found them & gave them each a copy. Over the years I had collected a lot of stuff & I really value the collection. The next thing I know she's asking me if she can have some of it, saying "you have duplicates of this". She is like a bulldozer. I would have preferred to have gone through & selected some for her but she bullied me into it. I have no idea what she took. I'll get over it, but that will be the last time I get stuff out when she's here.
Our house is looking pretty neat. I'm glad we don't live near G's family. I would get very overwhelmed.
 
Ouch, that does not sound like a pleasant visit. On the one hand I think it's ok to ask, but it should always be made clear that "no" is a valid answer that will be accepted without question.
 
Cate said:
GEM. (Gratitude, Empathy & Mindfulness.
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That sounds lovely...nice to find a good inspiring book!
Cate said:
Over the years I had collected a lot of stuff & I really value the collection. The next thing I know she's asking me if she can have some of it, saying "you have duplicates of this". She is like a bulldozer. I would have preferred to have gone through & selected some for her but she bullied me into it. I have no idea what she took.
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Oh dear that's too bad. Not a nice feeling to having been bullied into giving away things we don't want to.
Cate said:
I'm glad we don't live near G's family. I would get very overwhelmed.
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Yes sometimes nice to have some good geographical distances!
 
Thanks, Llama, Liza & Em :grouphug:
I was way too crabby with her to trust myself to type in my diary any further about how she made me feel. I was still simmering last night when I went to bed & couldn't get to sleep. I ended up sleeping in the spare singles room. I had given it such a good clean & rearranged the furniture, rolled the trundle away & changed all the bedding. The orientation of the bed was so much better. It only took me about half an hour to get to sleep there & I slept until 6.30 am.

I feel much calmer today & will be speaking up next time. As she left yesterday she said something about me having to get rid of some big elephant cushions when we downsize & I said we're not moving. She snapped at me & said, "I hope you don't have to!" I think she may be going through an angry stage of her grief. Quite a few things happened during the day that made me feel she may be resenting us for being happy.

I drove G out to golf this morning & had a lovely time walking Arch in town & chatted with quite a few people, some friends, and some strangers. I did a little shopping, went to the library & I rang my friend T1 & will visit her this afternoon just before I go back out to pick G up.

Reading the Resilience book has inspired me to make more of an effort for my friends & family & to spend less time online. I have arranged to meet up with another friend who is also a widow & we are having lunch with her & another couple who are mutual friends in a couple of weeks. I have felt really grateful today for my life & I am going to keep that at the forefront of my brain.

R & C are visiting again next weekend ❤️
 
It's good that you're aware of possible reasons why she's being the way she is but your feelings matter as well and I hope she comes round.
Yay for making space for friend time!
 
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