zoila diary

Ok, so I've been gone for a while. Fallen completely off track. Am feeling a bit like a lost cause at the moment. I just cant seem to stick to anything, I do good for a week or two then something happens and I go right off track. I really want to suceed and change my life, it feels so hard at the moment. I have had a few dramas with family members and I let being upset justify eating to make my self feel better. I know better then that. But I did it anyway. I am planing on starting a new in the morning, and I know I have said that many times before in this journal but I am really hoping to make it stick. I have joined a gym, going to go in in the morning a meet with them to talk about programs and what not. I didnt end up joining curves, because it sounded to limiting in what I wanted to do, plus they didnt have any treadmills and that was the main thing I wanted so I found this other place, which seems better cause they have a creche, I can pay by the month and there is no joining fee which is good, they also offer water arobics there so thats cool. I think once I start exercising again I will feel beter. ok thats me updated so I am back to the beging, and trying to start again.
 
Hey

Hey zoila, this is just a suggestion, but maybe it will help you. What I am doing is writing down every single thing I eat in this diary, including if I take a handful of crisps, or a sweet off someone. It just really helps me to think about what I'm eating during the day, knowing that I'll have to post it up here for all to see. Or even if you just write it in a little notebook at home, even if it's a bad day, and you've eaten a lot. It's amazing what seeing a long list of food can do for you. Anyway, best of luck, I'm rooting for you!
 
Zoila, that's a good suggestion from grumpygoddess. Write down everything, even when you feel you've eaten too much. Don't judge or beat yourself up for it (if you make yourself feel bad, you'll just want to fix it with food). Make a goal each day to eat certain number of calories (like 1400), and when you write stuff down, every day you reach that goal, you can have the sence of achievement. And days when you don't reach the goal, you can say, oh well, I'll just try for it tomorrow, no big deal. That is what I do, and that gave me a great sence of control over my life. So when things are going bad, instead of picking up that ice cream or chocolate bar, I count my calories for the day and realize I'm within my goal, and that gives me sense of accomplishment - which kind of makes me feel better. Anyway, this helped me to change relationship with food, and I think it may work for you as well. You can count calories easily with fitday.com or other similar websites.

Overall, it is very hard to stick with something after initial first couple of weeks, but once you go past that barrier, it will get easier, because you will start making a lifestyle change and you will get used to new routine.

In general, though, I applaud you for getting up and starting new again. It does not matter how many times you get off track, as long as you pick youself up and start new again. It is your determination that will help you to stick to it, and you're doing it! So don't be afraid to start new as long as you need to! I'm excited for you about the gym, and water aerobics will be great for you, as well as treadmill, so start doing some low impact exercise, and if you add calorie counting to it, you will succeed!
 
Hey Zoila!!
It sounds like you've made a wise decision, if Curves isn't the place for you (and it's not for everyone) there's always another fitness facility, and WOW you've already found one that suites you better!! Good on ya!!! :) I can tell you, that I know how impossible it some times feels when you're trying to eat better. You and I are in the exact same spot right now. I want EVERYTHING bad, but I HAVE to say no to ALL of it, otherwise...:eek: Take one day at a time though, so that it doesn't feel like forever...that's way too daunting. Good luck Darlin!!
 
Hi, Zoila,

Just checking on you... Let us know how the gym thing is going. I hope it is working out well! (no pun intended, LOL).
 
Hi, the gym is going really well. Didnt realise how much I missed going and my two friends have also joined now which makes it really fun. Its our goal to get in as much as we can next week. Plann is drop the kids off at school and continue on so thats good. My food I am still struggling with, just cant seem to get my self back on the shakes. Dont really understand why the first time it was easy. But I have my shake in the morning and then am off them by lunch time. Mean while with all my quick loss diets my friend (a different one) has been slowly doing the calerie counting thing, I thought it would be too slow but I saw her the other day and even though it has come off little bit at a time she has lost a heap now, she looked so good I was shocked. I starting to think she had the right idea all along. I lost weight faster but put it back on. So I am thinking it might be the beter way to go. Give it a try this week and see how I do.
 
Hi, Zoila,

Great news on the gym! I am happy you are enjoying it and sticking with it. Its great!

As for shakes - maybe you had more resolve in the beginning, and now it is harder to stick with them, because something else is easier.

I think you should give calorie counting a try, if you think the shakes are not going to workout. Calorie counting is the only way to go for me, because it is very flexible... I don't have to worry about having that much protein or that much fat... All I have to do is add up the calories and make sure they don't exceed certain number... Calorie counting turned out to be very effective method for me.

But the most effective diet is the one you can stick with long term. So experiment what works for you!

You can do it!
 
Hey Where You At? I Hope Everything Is Ok And We Miss You Ya Need To Get Back In Here And Post!!!!
 
Ok Dont Make Me Send A Possy Out For You Get Back In Here Am Worried!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
 
Hi guys, thanks for your post. Hmmm a possy into cyber space that gave me a good laugh trying to imagine how that would go about lol.
Well I have everything backward these days. For a while I had the diet happening and no exercise. Now I have the exercise happening well but am still struggling on the diet. Just cant seem to find that staying power I once had. My friends who stuck with the shake diet have now lost over 10kgs so I could kick my self really. I just keep stuffing around wondering back and forth between diets, its doing my head in really I wish I could get my will power back. Meanwhile though I am enjoying the gym. Met with one of the trainers there today and he put boxing into my routine wich made me so excited cause I use to do boxing before when I use to go to the gym and I loved it. I was so unfit though, its going to take me a while to get my fitness where it needs to be, but I am having fun with it. I realised today with all my stuffing around I have no hope of getting where I wanted to be by my birthday in July, which got me down a bit. I so didnt want to be turning 30 and still fat. I really feel like I have wasted my 20s being overweight and that idea of hiting the 30 mark just freaks me out a little bit.
My daughter brought home this picture she drew of me today, down the bottom was writen "this is my mummy puting her clothes on, she wears the same clothes every day cause she doesnt have any other ones that fit". Oh lovely, how embarrasing this picture has been on display in her class room for most of the year. Plus this morning when getting ready to take her to school, I was puting my gym shoes on as I was going after I droped her off and she said, "oh look you have shoe laces like mine, except my shoes are pretty and your are nasty" "nasty I say" surprise as I have never heard my 5yr old use that word before "thats a bit harsh", I tell her. Sensing my feelings may have been hurt she retracts "not nasty, there um, sorry mummy there nasty" Geez little girls, when did they become such fashion critics lol. I have to lose weight now, apparently I need new clothes and more fasionable shoes. You know I never have this trouble with my son lol he doesnt care what shoes I wear.
 
Sometimes kids will tell you things like it is without considerations for your feelings. Take a heart. I am sure she did not meen to be mean, just was speaking her mind. I'd say don't worry about the past, worry about the future. I think you can make a serious dent in your weight loss by your birthday. You just need to stick with it and stay on track. Concentrate on sticking to one thing at a time. I am so glad you are having fun at the gym! That's the best thing you can do! Do this: Stick with it for a week (I don't know your schedule, but let's say you do it 3 times a week), then next week, stick to the same scheduel at the gym, and add a small change in your diet, whatever that change is. And just do that for a week! Little by little those small changes will become habits, and before you know it, you will change your lifestyle to the better and will be loosing weight. Just make sure that the changes are small and easy to make. If you require yourself to change too much of your routine, it will make it harder to stick, and whatever works for success is what we need to follow...

Good luck, I think you can do it! Main thing is - don't depress yourself or put yourself down. Things are now the way the are, don't judge yourself. But now you have a choice - you can make it better for the future or not. If you make good choices consistantly more then bad ones, you will reach your goal weight.
 
Thanks nothing to lose. I know you are right. I know my daughter didnt mean to hurt my feelings, she is only 5 and really does not have a mean bone in her body she was just saying what she was thinking, just took me by surprise. Really I was laughing about it all after. They get to that age where they suddenly come aware of every little detail. And as its a new thought to them they feel they must share this with you as you probly never realised lol. Funny thing is the jump from little baby to little girl with own opinions was such a quick jump. One minutes its all about the cuddles and kisses next its about fashion.
I am feeling pretty up beat at the moment. I am trying not to beat my self up about failures and am not setting my self up for anymore falls. Basicly what I am aiming for this week is to cut all the junk out of my diet, I would like to stick to around 1500 cal, but mostly its about changing my diet. I am going to the gym minium of 3 times a week but aiming for 5. I am taking things slower this time cause I dont want to get side tracked again. I mean no point in losing a big amount fast if I am just going to gain it all back again.
Ok, now I have been checking out this fitday thing of yours for the calerie counting, but it doesnt have vegimite, anyone no how many caleries are in say a spoon of vegimite. I am going to try and write down my food to help me stay on track. Next week I am going to try and get back on to the yogurt for breakfast but for this week I am just not ready to give up my bread yet.

Breakfast this morning was 2 peices of toast with vegimite.
1 Orange
 
Its rough sometimes going to a website that helps you count cals, cuz the food you eat isn't always there, grr!! I had originally intended to do 4 days of workouts a week, but I actually have been going 5 days a week, you of course have a family, so its a little rougher on you, but if your able to, I would try for more than 3 days, ya feel sooo much better if ya get there more often :D have a great day!!
 
Zoila, you have a great plan. Gym sounds good, and you'll do great with food! I would encaurage you not to think of permanently "giving up" anything, because that will create more cravings, but of eating "bad" things less often, and substituting them for lighter foods whenever you can. Junk food is only junk because we overeat it. If we are able to eat only a few chips and not the whole bag, then they are not really that bad for us.

If you make small changes with wich you can live for a while, they will easily become habits and will put you on the way to better lifestyle.

Yes, not all the foods are available in fitday, but you can improvise. What is vegimite? Is that some kind of spread? You can do one of 2 things - write down the number of calories from a container (if you have that available) or search fitday for similar kind of spread, and just use that. Chances are the caloric value will be pretty similar. In the actual fitday desktop version, which is what I have, I can create custom foods and use them, which is very convenient for frequent meals and things fitday lacks.

Personally, counting calories and writing down everything I ate gave me a sence of control over what I'm eating and over results I get, which acted as an encoraging mechanism. I hope it will work that way for you too. Just don't forget to have a "cheat" day once a week, or at least a "cheat" meal, when you eat those "bad" or high-calorie foods.

I know you can do it! You're on the right track!
 
Thanks guys. I do plann to go 5 days a week to the gym, the plann is to drop our kids off at school and continue on (me and a friend) but like you said family does make things tricky, younger son was sick yesterday so wanted his mummy. Which is fine thats why I have 3 times min down, that will be my lowest amount that I will be ok with going in case life gets in the way. Vegimite is a spread pretty much just in Australia I think. We love it over here, my hubby thinks if I look up marmite that it would be similar but I am sure there is more caleries in that, but I will have to get my brain working and do the sums via the cals on the jar like you suggested. I do love my vegimite in the morning. I will have to post a bit later about my foods today, my kids a haveing a screaming match at the moment, and I have to go referee.
 
Cool, sounds like you have a great plan for the gym! Yes, life happens, and we need to take into account for the times when we can't exercise or diet as planned. Otherwise we can set ourselves up for failure, and would not serve anyone any good! :) So, Kudos to you for the right attitude! :)

As far as foods not on fitday - I improvise to "make" them fit. Also I compare foods (for example, they don't have an entry for soft cheese (like laughing cow), but the serving size is 50 cals, so I use cream cheese entry, and enter the amount to make the total be 50 cals (like 1 Table Spoon). As long as total calories are about the same, it will work.
Another thing that helped me is weighing everything. At first I felt like a dork, but then I can tell from experience what my portion size should be. It raises your awareness of a caloric content of food and caloric dencity, and it definitely helps to serve a more appropriate portion, and through repetition, changes your lifestyle.
 
Morning Zolia~
Just reading through your journals and I had the same promblem with my daughter. I use to always complain about "How FAT I am" and One day she said "look mamma your fat like the boy" and It was ahippo on a cartoon :mad: But kids, will be kids right :D
You are doing a good job and don't give up on the gym. One day at a time. Have a wonderful day and drink your WATER
 
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