Hey folks,
2025 has been treating me kindly. I was approved for permanent disability pension, which means I will never have to worry about my financial survival again. It´s not like I´ll ever be rich, but the pension even allows me to work for a limited amount if I ever find something sustainable.
This has helped me manage my stress much, much better. Diet and training are going stellarly. I did gain a bit during last year from stress eating but weight is on the decline again.
I started to take testosterone on 17.3.2025. I figured that by this point, and as a pensioner, my likelihood of receiving fertility treatments is slim anyway, so I might just as well focus on my own health and accept that I won´t have bio kids. I used a telehealth servie to do so because the Finnish trans clinic system keeps being a piece of shit. I do feel sad about childlessness, but testosterone is already having a hugely positive impact on my mood and sleep. I have zero nightmares, sleep like a log, and wake up around 7AM without an alarm clock. My appetite has changed: I´m less interested in the taste of things and more in the texture of things. Sweet foods have no appeal to me now. I also dislike coffee which I would never have believed was possible haha. Instead I really enjoy herbal teas, fenugreek being my favorite.
I guess that if the options are no kids and no HRT, vs no kids but HRT, I´ll take the latter. T also won´t immediately sterilize me so some Deus Ex Machina may still show up but perhaps it´s best to live in the moment and take the good things I can get and make my own happiness.
Got sick with the flu so I´ve only been to the gym twice after starting T but I did DL 105KG on my third day on T. Not explainable through physical changes yet, I think. More likely due to me feeling braver.
I hope everyone is progressing nicely and managing their lives. Be well, folks!