I cleaned up He-man's cage and it sucked way less than I thought it would. I tossed the bedding tray altogether as it's useless - I don't use beddings but fleece instead. Cleaning the cage was a pretty straightforward process, I put Hegel in his carry case, took out all his "furniture", hoovered the poop and stray hay, put the fleece and the carpet underneath it to the wash, and wiped down the plastic levels with unscented dish washing liquid and then with alcohol wipes to clean off any detergent residue and pee and poop germs. Then I put in a fresh fleece liner, cleaned and re-filled his water bottle and pellet dish, and put the man back into his crib. Took me maybe 15 mins of active work plus what it took for the washing machine to do its thing. Hegel didn't seem too bummed that I woke him up a bit early, he seemed to doze off in his carry case and got some dried dandelion leaf as a treat afterwards. My hoover did get jammed though so I need to unclog it; I think the wood shavings I had in the carry case for the trip got into a lump or something.
I also cleaned the rest of my apartment with the same momentum and now it's clean and fresh at least until the next time I let my man out lol. The poop isn't that gross really, and it's really quick and easy to hoover or sweep up (I wish I didn't break the vacuum...), but what little amounts he pees isn't too pleasant if it has time to dry up. Leaves a gross rusty-looking stain. But it's not an exaggeration that properly cared for chinchillas don't really stink. After the poop had been hoovered, I probably could have left the fleece liner in for a day or two, as he doesn't pee much. But I wanted him to be fresh and comfy and hygiene is very important for chinchillas, too.
I think I'll have a beer now to calm my nerves a bit before the doctor tomorrow and then I'll unload the dishwasher and eat my leftover takeout.
BTW - did I mention that H-man is a yakuza: he misses one finger/toe in his front paw! It's not unusual that chinchillas miss toes, as they are delicate, and even the best-kept chinchillas can get into accidents. But it doesn't bother him in any way, he's very acrobatic and not in pain.