Cate's Diary

Thanks, Petal. I am going to take it easy & just go for short walks & no golf until I see a specialist.
I think the cultures who live with or near one another have it right. R’s dog is the biggest problem. We’ll see what happens. We haven’t heard anything today.
 
Knowing you can go "home" when things get bad is a major comfort even if you never end up actually doing it. Glad to hear your knee's doing a bit better.
 
Thanks, LaMa. I know that the offer helped him yesterday. It’s really hard when you can’t talk face to face. He needs hugs!
 
It's 7.47 am & I am relieved & pleased to report that after a more active day yesterday, with quite a bit of short flat walking in town(almost 5,000 steps) & getting in & out of the car, I woke up no worse. I wear the knee brace all day now & the swelling has come right down. I slept well but woke at 5 am, wide awake. G is off to golf today. I feel so much better being able to walk around again. So long as I am careful I think it should be ok.
 
That’s great news Cate . Have you any idea what triggered it in first place. Rest really does help and the brace sounds like it is helping
 
Hey Cate, I used to have more knee problems, but have found weight training has really helped. In fact that is one of the things that triggered my gym going. The doctor suggested it. I have not done anything in a gym or with weights since high school, so I know age is not a limitation to starting. My knees are arthritic and strengthening my legs has really take a lot of stress off of the knees. I still have the arthritis, but rarely have pain and have not had swelling in months. I don't know if it could work for you, but you might think about it. I am sure LaMa would have more insight than I.

All of my dogs have also been afraid of thunder and lightening, it must be instinctive. The only cure seems to be old age and hearing loss...

Hope things settle for R, that has to be stressful for you. Offering to let him move in with you for a while was generous and kind, he is lucky to have such parents.
 
Thanks, Petal. I do have osteoarthritis & I think playing golf has exacerbated the problem. I doubt I'll get back into it, at least for the rest of this year.
Hi, Rob. I'll wait until I see an osteo & a physio before I think about strength training, but will just keep up the short walks while it's not hurting. It is incredibly stressful with R as he is really down again & cries when I talk to him. His life feels like it's falling apart at the moment & he has so many stresses. I called coming back home for a while pausing & having a breather. I have been lying awake thinking of him. I hope we can help get him back to a good place again. I also really hope he'll decide to take medication again.
Hi, Em. I will take it easy. I don't want to go backwards. Your turkey challenge is a welcome boost. I'm not aiming for a turkey as that's too much pressure & I don't need that, but I do aim to lose at least a plump chook!

Today is wild, wild weather. It's really windy("damaging winds") & there's lots of rain. More reading. @Emilyrose I read a good book yesterday called Interrogating Ellie, by Julian Gray. I think you would like it. It's based on a true story. @LaMaria -it's based in Vienna mostly.
 
I actually love windy days, we don't get a lot of them here anymore. At least that's how it seems. Thanks for the book recommendation, will check it out. And I like how the turkey challenge has revved us up a bit - it will be fun I think! I am enjoying the jokes. :D

Is R still with his girlfriend? That's heartbreaking that he is crying on the phone. At the same time, it's great that he can be open with you about how he is feeling and that he is not trying to hide it. Would you encourage him to come for a visit? He could spend time with you and G and Archie in your beautiful home in the lovely countryside. It might help.
 
Hi, Em. The turkey challenge has given me a lift too. We probably all could do with a laugh.
The R & his GF thing I am unsure about & I am trying to remain hopeful. I know that they are still seeing one another, but that may have turned into friendship, rather than romance. I will remain hopeful. I have spoken to him a few times today and twice he has been very tearful. Poor G broke down this morning too. He will be coming home soon, maybe for a few months & he is back on his meds as of yesterday & is seeing his doc tomorrow, hopefully for a certificate. He needs to get himself healthy again. There is much to be done with his house before he comes up. He's going to sell it & it needs to be emptied & painted out. It's very complicated. After talking with him today a couple of things have been sorted. The last call he sounded much better. I have been very careful with my advice, but we have resolved a few things together. He has people helping him tonight & the next few days. He will stay with friends the next week or so & they have offered to have his dog during the day while he works on the house.
I am grateful that he has realised that he will need to keep taking his meds. I talked to him more about that. This is the first time he had taken the meds & then gone off them & he now realises just what a difference they do make. 2020-not a year we'll forget, that's for sure.
 
Ah I feel for your kid Cate and I know he is a grown up but we still see them as children I suppose. I'm glad he has help and he is back on the meds . It just goes to show that so many people have problems and issues and he is lucky to have you in his corner .

Happy you are loving the turkey challenge too . Here is a turkey skit but think this one about 30lb. Lol

 
Such a relief that R is taking his meds again! Nobody likes them but they really do make a difference for many things.
 
Thanks, Petal. They are always your kids when they are sick or hurt, that's for sure. That video made me laugh. I would be very slim if I lost a turkey that size!
Thanks, LaMa. It's a really tough way to realise that he needs those meds. This is a hard lesson. It has taken its toll on the two of us & we hardly slept last night. We can just have an easy day today. D & the kids are staying tonight, but he's having dinner with them out & then staying here the night. Tomorrow he works & we are taking them to a roller derby as a surprise in the afternoon. Tomorrow night they'll all stay. D has realised that he was asking us too often & he seemed to be very appreciative that I said yes. We haven't talked to him about his brother yet & may not. I'm quite sure he'll be moving home for a while. D doesn't seem to have a lot of sympathy for his younger brother, which hurts us as a bit. I'm actually looking forward to seeing the grandkids. Their older brother I messaged yesterday & he's coming for dinner tomorrow night too.
 
Maybe D feels that R takes a lot of your time and attention, and he feels jealous for that reason? I think that can happen in families where one kid is struggling a bit more, or has an illness, or whatever the situation might be. Just a thought. Even when people are grown up, those childhood resentments can linger. Siblings can be a lot harder on each other than the parents might ever be. Maybe R doesn't give him support, just because he's not able to? I don't know.

I love the Mr Bean video Petal, brought me back to my childhood! I've seen that episode so many times, but not for a long time.

Have a lovely weekend Cate, you're a great mum.
 
Hi Cate, I definitely haven't been able to catch-up on all 812 pages. But, hopefully I can keep tabs on your progress from here. What's your current goal?
 
Lovely to hear you are able to walk so much more already Cate. Glad the rest and the knee brace seem to be doing its thing!
I'm sorry your one son has hit a rough time. So good you are able to be there for him and offer him the support he needs. Excellent too that he's back onto his meds.
 
hope you have a lovely weekend Cate . It sounds nice and you will enjoy the grandkids . I agree with Em your a great mum and a grand mum too . Sending you hugs :grouphug:
 
Emilyrose said:
Maybe D feels that R takes a lot of your time and attention, and he feels jealous for that reason? I think that can happen in families where one kid is struggling a bit more, or has an illness, or whatever the situation might be. Just a thought. Even when people are grown up, those childhood resentments can linger. Siblings can be a lot harder on each other than the parents might ever be. Maybe R doesn't give him support, just because he's not able to? I don't know.
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You may be right, Em. We had a good talk last night & told him what had been going on & he sounded much more sympathetic.
Emilyrose said:
Have a lovely weekend Cate, you're a great mum.
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Thank you, Em :grouphug:
Lingwo said:
Hi Cate, I definitely haven't been able to catch-up on all 812 pages. But, hopefully I can keep tabs on your progress from here. What's your current goal?
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Hi, Lingwo. I think my goal is to just have progress at this stage. I have 10-12 kg to lose to get back to my happy weight. I am struggling with it. Thanks for visiting my diary. It really does make a difference when we support one another.
liza said:
Lovely to hear you are able to walk so much more already Cate. Glad the rest and the knee brace seem to be doing its thing!
I'm sorry your one son has hit a rough time. So good you are able to be there for him and offer him the support he needs. Excellent too that he's back onto his meds.
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Thanks, Liza. It feels better being able to walk without pain. I just have to make sure I stay on the flat & don't overdo it.
R has lots of friends helping him today. G & I both got a good night's sleep last night & feel a bit stronger which helps. We both shed some more tears yesterday.
Petal001 said:
hope you have a lovely weekend Cate . It sounds nice and you will enjoy the grandkids . I agree with Em your a great mum and a grand mum too . Sending you hugs :grouphug:
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Thanks, Petal. It was nice to have the talk with our older son last night. The GK's were in the room with us. It won't hurt them to hear any of it. The more people understand mental illness the better. Their uncle would love to see more of them. G & I are going to help him get his drivers licence while he is with us. It will change his life. I can just see him getting a campervan.

We are taking the kids as a surprise today to the roller derby. G & I have never been & it's only 25km away. That should be fun.
 
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