So ive been a bit emotional these last few days, my period came earlier a few days or so I wonder if it is messin me up, LOL!
The x and i have been talkin and getting along for awhile now. I almost feel realived...it is nice after 5 yrs of fighting to finally talk and spend some time together and enjoy it.
There are alot of little things that have changed this time around that I am totally noticing. I am recieiving alot of pleasent surprizes that so far havent disappeared...that continue on...We are getting closer every visit adn convo which is a little alarming but still nice...
the last two visits he has hugged me and it was a real hug, ya know...ironically I always loved his hugs and arms around me cuz that made me feel safe...ha ha ha!I can laugh now....
I am no longer in love with him at this present time and such but coudl easily fall back in love ya know...Im playing it safe and going one day at a time, one convo and one visit and so far all has been great.
He is finally respectign me and seeing his daughter regularly plus initiating it.
We went to the beach on Sunday night to watch the sunset it was beautiful and we had a great time. He walked me to my car afterwards as I didnt feel comfy going myself int he dark...after we drove him back to his bike, when he said goodnight and goodbye, he looked me int he eyes and thanked me for meeting him and spendign the evening with him and for most imprtantly bringing Taneesha to visit him. He told me how much it meant to hima nd how speacial it is for the 3 of us to have been at Cresent Beach togather and for Taneesha to share it there with us. That beach was always our place. We went there constantly, it is so beautiful, hands down my fav place! Anyway we conceived Taneesha on that beach, he always meantions it when we are there and he said that is why he was so happy and appreciative for us to all be there together...this really through me, he has been actign so outta character...and that isnt liek him to say somethign like that...
Anyway that is what has been going on with me...
I figured out why I dont eat at home and why i ate so much at mom and dads...
Im totally stressed at home, and at mom and dads I wasnt and arent...I guess Im not a stress eater, lol.
I am not starving myself only eatign when hugry which isnt often as I guess my tummy has shrunk alot.