Hey, this is my journey thus far, I don't know if it will help or if anyone can relate to it (it is loooooong), but here it is.
I am a 17 year old male from Northern BC, Canada. I've had an... interesting diet history, to say the least. The short version, I have never been extremely obese, but I got to the point of extremely overweight when I said enough is enough. Long version, I have been a little "chunky" since 7th grade, carried it into 8th grade, and things started going way south when I started home schooling in 9th grade (Having a fully stocked fridge and cupboards at your fingertips for most of the day isn't great).
In grade 10, I was 14/15 and was tipping in a little over 200. I have always carried my weight extremely well, and believe me, that wasn't a good thing, and I am now trying to be a cow about that - I think it got to my head more than anything. I only told my weight to my closer friends, and the reaction was usually the same: "Wow, you don't look that at all." I wasn't regularily active, but I could play tennis and hockey very well despite my weight, because I had always been a smallish, active kid when I was young.
Then came grade 11 in 2006/07. Things were kind of crazy in my life during that time, a lot of personal stuff was happening. In the winter I was I think 220, by summer, it was 240.
There is an unlimited amount of words that I can write to tell you how I have struggled with diets before, and I really mean that. Honestly, I have started/stopped so many times that I can't even tell you. I have been on an interesting roller coaster, to say the least. I could start, but only for a couple days, then I would be back to the old habits for a week or two or even three. I still have my old calender (consider it sentimental now) with sporadic circles on it, marking times when I was "going to start" my "diet." I recall all the times I wrote on my whiteboard behind my door, "Starting on xx date, this is what I ate today, this is my goal", only to erase it days later, knowing I just burned it. It is literally overwhelming to reflect on my struggle to stay consistent; it brings a lot of emotions to me to think about it.
It was a weird feeling going into July of 2007, hitting just under 240. All my clothes were too small now, except the new tshirts and suit I had bought. I hated wearing my new clothes, though; I knew they just didn't feel right on me, like I knew I shouldnt be wearing these type of shirts, but I was trying to hide my weight as best I could. I had never felt this way before, the way when I was running bases in baseball with friends, playing a big game of street hockey, even in a "lighter" acticity such as recreational tennis. I felt my weight slowing me down, and I was very self conscious (and still am to this day by nature) about the way I looked. I resorted to black and loose clothing when I was active, and hoodies and sweatshirts a lot of times when I was just hanging out with friends.
I honestly can't tell you what made me make the change; obviously, there is no one single reason... I think everybody probably has a lot of reasons to make a serious change in their life. I don't know what it was or how I kept it going at the start of August; it just felt like another start to the "diet I needed to get on." But for some reason, I just kept going. 232, it read the first week, as compared to the 240 it should have. I knew a little bit about water weight and losing a lot in the first week before obviously, but I sure didn't expect 8 pounds to be missing somewhere.
Then the next week: 227. I really couldn't believe it... more then 10 pounds? I had only done this once before in my life, in grade 8 with my mom when she started her weight watchers plan.
Next week, it was creeping up on 220. I still don't know why I wasn't going on a binge every night like I had for over a year before. I was now very comfortable in my suits, my "new" clothing was just starting to feel too loose on me, and I even busted out some old shirts from years before which were tight, but not with my belly busting out at the front.
I kept on this pace until I had 210, where I was now in a good part of my old clothes and was doing good. I slowed down there, and have been at 205-212 from November-January of 2007/08.
I still can't believe that I lost all that weight. I didn't go all the way back up, but even if I messed up on one day, it took a LOT to get back on, which is why I stayed at just over 205.
So, three days ago, I was back at 205, wondering where I was going. I had recieved a lot of comments about how much I slimmed down, and I was thankful, but I just knew it wasn't enough... not yet. The last 25-30 pounds were killing me, and thats where I stand today.
Thankfully, I was crusing around the WLF forum last week and I am now 100% back on my journey. I am, disgustingly, JUST over 200, I clocked in at 200.2 this morning, and was ready to throw a fit, I want the 190's SO BAD. I have never wanted my goal weight more than I have since last week. I know where I went wrong the last 2-3 months, and I feel on top of the world... I just know I'm going to get there by this summer.
Mad props for anyone who read this, I put on some music, started writing and I just realized I probably wrote way too much and am boring a lot of people right now.
I don't know if I can pass anything on that will be extremely helpful, as I am not the ideal role model for weight loss... when I'm hot, I'm on fire and I lose weight like nobody's business, but sometimes I get flamed out. Anyways, this might sound very odd or obscure, but, you never know, it helps for me. Finding the right motivating factor is big for me... it can be anything, and I have a LOT of them, ranging from certain people, such as athletes I desire to be as good as, looking better in pictures, not having trouble later on in life with the ladyfolk, anything. I really do have a lot. The only thing I might pass on is find yours... doesn't sound very helpful writing it, but its what keeps me going.