Shoes!

This has gotten interesting. Yes, the way a man presents himself on a date says something about his personality and what he values. If he shows up in a ratty old T-Shirt, Jeans, and athletic shoes, it says he obviously doesn't care about his personal appearance. If he doesn't care about his personal appearance, he must not value himself or what others think of him. Dressing nicely is a sign of respect. If he doesn't respect you enough to put on a decent pair of shoes to look nice, then he probably won't respect you in other ways down the road. It's standard practice to dress nicely on a date. If the guy can't master that first basic dating rule, then he probably has some bigger flaws somewhere else.

Clothes are less an issue of looks, and more an issue of personality. What a person wears says something about who they are. Back to the pretty face argument, if a person has a nice face, but dresses terribly and always wears tattered clothes, it means they have personality issues. Clothes are a choice. We consciously CHOOSE what clothes and shoes we put on. No, we can't choose whether or not we have beautiful faces, but we ca choose to dress nicely. Dressing nicely is almost just as easy as dressing poorly. Yes, dress shoes aren't as comfortable, but the benefit gained form looking nice and showing respect to the people who have to look at you makes up for the small sacrifice in comfort.

There:

That's why I use what a guy wears to judge his personality.
 
And if he's just poor?
 
Moonbeam3 said:
Now here's a question for you. Which would you rather have. A beautiful face, we're talking knockout, with a less than perfect body (for kicks lets say, about 10 pounds overweight) OR knockout body-who ever your fantasy chick is- but a not so good looking face???
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I'd rather have a girl that I have a connection with. Looks don't matter. I'm not shallow =] Fortunately, though, I've found one of both.

How can you judge a person by their shoes? lol that doesn't make any sense to me. Dress to impress I guess. No rhyme intended lol
 
Look at it this way. Say there's this girl who is naturally beautiful. Say that she dresses terribly in baggy clothes that do not show off her figure, wears men's athletic shoes, hasn't washed her hair in days, and hasn't shaved her legs or underarms in weeks?

She probably wouldn't be the first to catch your eye. You prabaly wouldn't want to get to know her very well at first glance because her looks are covered up by bad clothes and bad personal grooming.

Same thing goes for guys. I would be much more likely to want to get to know the guy who respects himself by dressing nicely. If he can't respect himself, how can I expect him to respect me?
 
spicypumpkin said:
This has gotten interesting. Yes, the way a man presents himself on a date says something about his personality and what he values. If he shows up in a ratty old T-Shirt, Jeans, and athletic shoes, it says he obviously doesn't care about his personal appearance. If he doesn't care about his personal appearance, he must not value himself or what others think of him. Dressing nicely is a sign of respect. If he doesn't respect you enough to put on a decent pair of shoes to look nice, then he probably won't respect you in other ways down the road. It's standard practice to dress nicely on a date. If the guy can't master that first basic dating rule, then he probably has some bigger flaws somewhere else.

Clothes are less an issue of looks, and more an issue of personality. What a person wears says something about who they are. Back to the pretty face argument, if a person has a nice face, but dresses terribly and always wears tattered clothes, it means they have personality issues. Clothes are a choice. We consciously CHOOSE what clothes and shoes we put on. No, we can't choose whether or not we have beautiful faces, but we ca choose to dress nicely. Dressing nicely is almost just as easy as dressing poorly. Yes, dress shoes aren't as comfortable, but the benefit gained form looking nice and showing respect to the people who have to look at you makes up for the small sacrifice in comfort.

There:

That's why I use what a guy wears to judge his personality.
Click to expand...

With an attitude like that, you will probobly never meet any interresting or original men. I know I'm out, and I was the only one wearing a "penguin suit" at the christmas ball.
 
spicypumpkin said:
.. Yes, the way a man presents himself on a date says something about his personality and what he values... If he doesn't care about his personal appearance, he must not value himself or what others think of him. Dressing nicely is a sign of respect. .. It's standard practice to dress nicely on a date. If the guy can't master that first basic dating rule, then he probably has some bigger flaws somewhere else.

... Dressing nicely is almost just as easy as dressing poorly. Yes, dress shoes aren't as comfortable, but the benefit gained form looking nice and showing respect to the people who have to look at you makes up for the small sacrifice in comfort.

There:

That's why I use what a guy wears to judge his personality.
Click to expand...

Spicy just became my new hero! Yes, I completely agree that dressing nicely on a date has more to do with respect than with 'shallowness'.

We're not saying dress in Armani for Pete's sake, we're saying present yourself in a way that says, 'I like you enough to have cleaned myself up' as opposed to showing up in your most comfortable 'worn' shoes, favorite t-shirt and holy jeans which would say the opposite ('come see what a big fat slob I am')...
 
There's a difference between dressing badly (the examples you keep coming with) dressing ok (like normal people) and dressing nice.
 
There is a time and a place. You wouldn't go on a job interview in scuffed up shoes and raggedy clothes. But you could get away with a more relaxed look if you're going to hang out at the pub to watch your favorite team.

Yes, I would be disappointed if a guy showed up dressed badly/dumpy on a date--different than wearing expensive clothing--when I've taken the time to show that I respect myself and him by cleaning up a bit...
 
There is some truth to waht you say...about standard grooming practices. The rest is ridiculous. You would judge someone's personality on the clothes that YOU find nice? What you say only has merit if the person in question decided to wear clothes that THEY deem are nice. Do you see the difference? In addition, the conclusions you claim to come to are totally baseless.

If someone doesn't trip over themself to impress you or impress others, they must not respect you?

There are lots of people who dress nicely, but they don't do it out of respect, they do it for vanity. There are lots of people who don't look sharp, but how foolish it would be to dismiss them as "flawed".

Dressing "nicely" doesn't cost much at all. Dressing nicely to suit someone's tastes does.

Remember your claims were general. They weren't just about "dates"...
 
They (my comments) most certainly were about dating....re-read my posts. I never said that I judge someone's personality by their clothing...just pointed out the message it would say.

And I never said 'dress nicely to my tastes' I just said show respect in YOURSELF by trying to look your best...
 
Everyone seems to be misinterpreting what I mean by dressing nicely. In no way am stating that a guy has to be dressed for a fancy ball or anything. That would be ridiculous. By nice, I mean clothes that aren't falling apart. That's all I mean.

And, yes, dressing nicely doesn't cost a lot. THAT'S WHAT I SAID!

I never stated that I would judge someone based on the clothes that "I" found nice. By nice, once again, I mean fully clothed in clothing that is not falling apart or meant to be slept in.

Never once did I say someone had to trip over themselves to dress nicely. I even stated that putting on clothes that don't have rips or tears in them is no more difficult than putting on ratty old clothes that need to go in that garbage.

And to Karky, you stated this: "With an attitude like that, you will probably never meet any interresting or original men. I know I'm out, and I was the only one wearing a "penguin suit" at the christmas ball."

I never once said that a guy needed to be dressed in a tux to deserve my attention. Did I? That would be a shame if anyone were that way. As long as you don't dress in pajamas and ripped clothes all of the time, then I'd be happy to date you.

So I guess your definition of nice is different than mine. I will repeat. Nice does not mean wearing a suit and tie for goodness sake! It means wearing clothes that don't have holes in them!


And, I'm sorry if my claims came across as general. I intended them to be about dates and dates only. I thought that using the phrase "it's standard practice to dress nicely on a date" would get the message across that I was talking about dating, but apparently, it didn't.
 
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