I think sometimes we expect people to judge us when they accomplish something we´ve worked towards but not reached. And a year from now who knows who´ll be feeling envious of you, thinking you´ve only worked on your weight for a year? The truth is that nobody can look inside someone else and see how they´ve struggled to get to where they are. You CAN do this, even though it is hard. And you´ll be SO proud of yourself!
pussycat's diary
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Cate
Long term member
When you do this, you will have so much to be proud of, because it is not easy. It may not have been easy for your friend. We are all just humans & we all feel envy for others, at some time or another. You can do it too
alligatorob
Respected Member
Hey KC, I don't have time to really catch up, but did read you last couple of posts. You write very well and give us a lot of interesting information, thanks for that!
I believe talking with and thinking about others and their diets and weight can help give us insights and sometimes inspiration, its helped me. But too much comparison to others is never good. The world is and always will be full of people fatter than we are, and skinnier, more or less fit, its just how things are. Feeling a little envy about your friend is natural, but being happy for her is better, and I am sure you are. One of my favorite weight loss lines was from Rodney Dangerfield, something like: "You want to look thinner? Get fatter friends."
Always good to see you here.
I believe talking with and thinking about others and their diets and weight can help give us insights and sometimes inspiration, its helped me. But too much comparison to others is never good. The world is and always will be full of people fatter than we are, and skinnier, more or less fit, its just how things are. Feeling a little envy about your friend is natural, but being happy for her is better, and I am sure you are. One of my favorite weight loss lines was from Rodney Dangerfield, something like: "You want to look thinner? Get fatter friends."
Always good to see you here.
kittycat1
New member
First, I have lost 2,5kgs.
Some people would say that's not much, but honestly that happened while I was eating whatever I want in my feeding window, so actually it's pretty awesome. It's actually weight I had before New Year's feasts (which prolongued almost till the middle of January) so I'm not seeing anything special in the mirror, but at least I lost everything I put on in that period.
I promised myself I would celebrate every lost kg! So yes - I'm happy!
But definetely will track calories more carefully. Didn't do that all the time in last few days which and I have to work on that in the future.
And to be honest, I experienced that few times in life. There is always some asshole who is like 5-10kg overweight due to lack of exercise or something, loses that and then acts shitty towards me who has emotional eating problem and has 20-30 to lose almost my whole life since kindergarten. I mean, after a while I learned that some people are simply jerks, regardless of their weight loss, weight gain, skinnyness, fatnes.
For example, only friend with whom I can talk honestly about my weight is actually very slim, and she has never been fat. So, if I can open my heart to her without feeling judged - that mean it's possible to never experience weight issues and still be empathetic, which she is.
Also, about the quote - yes, there are people who could be envious of me in the future. It's a tempting thought sometimes, but I have other more important motives now - health is one of them. Also, you are right about invisible struggles. I really don't know what she went trough and how did she felt. As I said, we are not that close so I only see the appearance most of the time. But yeah, her slimmer look after a year doesn'tmean she didn't had struggles. I need to remind myself of that more.
TBH, when I have good day, it all seem much more positive and I'm more thinking about those kind of people as inspiration, but on my bad days I feel more envy. I hope envy will disappear during my weight loss, I really expect that!
This Rodney line is hillarious!
Some people would say that's not much, but honestly that happened while I was eating whatever I want in my feeding window, so actually it's pretty awesome. It's actually weight I had before New Year's feasts (which prolongued almost till the middle of January) so I'm not seeing anything special in the mirror, but at least I lost everything I put on in that period.
I promised myself I would celebrate every lost kg! So yes - I'm happy!
But definetely will track calories more carefully. Didn't do that all the time in last few days which and I have to work on that in the future.
I hear ya sis. When I was your age my cycles were more messed up than today. Good thing with hitting 30s and above is that PCOS is less hard to live with. Hormone levels are dropping, and periods are more frequent, even almost regular at times. That's what happened to me, besides the fact that I'm fatter than in my 20s. Actually in last 4-5 years my periods are more frequent than ever, I mean average of 35 days +/- 7 days is pretty great in my head! Age was definetely the biggest problem solver in my case. It's great you manage to do that with healthy lifestyle by itself that means you are able to enjoy normal cycles even in 20s! It's a great thing.
Thank you LaMaria. Yes, you are right, I somehow feel ashamed because I think those successful people would judge me.
And to be honest, I experienced that few times in life. There is always some asshole who is like 5-10kg overweight due to lack of exercise or something, loses that and then acts shitty towards me who has emotional eating problem and has 20-30 to lose almost my whole life since kindergarten. I mean, after a while I learned that some people are simply jerks, regardless of their weight loss, weight gain, skinnyness, fatnes.
For example, only friend with whom I can talk honestly about my weight is actually very slim, and she has never been fat. So, if I can open my heart to her without feeling judged - that mean it's possible to never experience weight issues and still be empathetic, which she is.
Also, about the quote - yes, there are people who could be envious of me in the future. It's a tempting thought sometimes, but I have other more important motives now - health is one of them. Also, you are right about invisible struggles. I really don't know what she went trough and how did she felt. As I said, we are not that close so I only see the appearance most of the time. But yeah, her slimmer look after a year doesn'tmean she didn't had struggles. I need to remind myself of that more.
Thank you Cate. Some part of me still think I can't and that's a bummer. But I'm working on that. I need to start to believe in myself again. It's hard when you did that long time ago and then put every kg back on again. It's somehow like I'm a long term failure, really hard to describe. But as I said - I'm a fighter.When you do this, you will have so much to be proud of, because it is not easy. It may not have been easy for your friend. We are all just humans & we all feel envy for others, at some time or another. You can do it too
Thanks! I'm gonna try to think of this as a new start, this time for REALwith those above - you surely can do it too.
And in fact you've already begun to "do it too", with proven results as seen in the "non-scale victories" thread! The rest of the victory is coming - cheers, Kittykat!
Thank you! Your post makes sense. We are all different, I know that. That's why I wrote I'm not envious of someone's weight loss in general, but only in some cases, when someone very obese get very very fit and athletic. That's probably my goal and how I see myself under all this fat.
TBH, when I have good day, it all seem much more positive and I'm more thinking about those kind of people as inspiration, but on my bad days I feel more envy. I hope envy will disappear during my weight loss, I really expect that!
This Rodney line is hillarious!
alligatorob
Respected Member
I would think that would only be people who have never done it and don't know how hard losing 2.5 kg can be. I think you are doing very well, and I am in a position to know.
kittycat1
New member
Hey people!
I've been off for some time. Things in my life got some new directions so I found out I'm moving 800km away in next two months.
Although I expected that, it's kinda shocker, it actually came faster than I thought. I was so busy in last 10 days organizing stuff, trying to figure out where can I donate my excess clothes and furniture. Luckily, my friends will take most of furniture, some of them are decorating their places so they could really use my stuff. Also I'm selling my car, I'll eventually have to close my small company and open new one in new country. ANd yes, I will be done with my therapist. Soo many changes in my life!
In one hand, I'm stressed and scared, in the other hand I'm excited and hopefully this will give me some new moments in life and an opportunity to start over with some things. I was quite static and sedentary in last two years, not only bcs of my job, but in my life overall. This right now is everything BUT static, and I'm less in my head and more into action and doing things. I think that's not bad.
I have lot of plans after I move. First, need to decorate new appartment, and I already checked the neighbourhood on Google - there are few gyms near my new place there! I can't wait to start going to the gym again! Since I will be alone a lot while my husband is working there, plan is to get up every morning with him and go back into a training. I really can't wait to do that! Also gym is my safe zone and doing something familiar every morning could really make transition easier.
When it comes to nutrition, I have decided to totally quit sugar/cakes and bread/pasta products (pizzas, pastas, sponge cakes, lasagna, etc) in next two months for starters. Although I have at least 14-16 hour fasts (or more), I noticed sugar doesn't do any good for me, I still have troubles with water retention and some other stuff. This is my third day without sugar and bread, I had 3 meals (and 10-12hrs fasting windows) and I'll continue having them till I get used to this, so I'll get back to longer fasting windows.
I've been off for some time. Things in my life got some new directions so I found out I'm moving 800km away in next two months.
Although I expected that, it's kinda shocker, it actually came faster than I thought. I was so busy in last 10 days organizing stuff, trying to figure out where can I donate my excess clothes and furniture. Luckily, my friends will take most of furniture, some of them are decorating their places so they could really use my stuff. Also I'm selling my car, I'll eventually have to close my small company and open new one in new country. ANd yes, I will be done with my therapist. Soo many changes in my life!
In one hand, I'm stressed and scared, in the other hand I'm excited and hopefully this will give me some new moments in life and an opportunity to start over with some things. I was quite static and sedentary in last two years, not only bcs of my job, but in my life overall. This right now is everything BUT static, and I'm less in my head and more into action and doing things. I think that's not bad.
I have lot of plans after I move. First, need to decorate new appartment, and I already checked the neighbourhood on Google - there are few gyms near my new place there! I can't wait to start going to the gym again! Since I will be alone a lot while my husband is working there, plan is to get up every morning with him and go back into a training. I really can't wait to do that! Also gym is my safe zone and doing something familiar every morning could really make transition easier.
When it comes to nutrition, I have decided to totally quit sugar/cakes and bread/pasta products (pizzas, pastas, sponge cakes, lasagna, etc) in next two months for starters. Although I have at least 14-16 hour fasts (or more), I noticed sugar doesn't do any good for me, I still have troubles with water retention and some other stuff. This is my third day without sugar and bread, I had 3 meals (and 10-12hrs fasting windows) and I'll continue having them till I get used to this, so I'll get back to longer fasting windows.
overlandflyer
Well-known member
as hard as it may seem to cut back on sugar, a benefit you should feel in a while are much less severe hunger episodes.
alligatorob
Respected Member
Hey KC, good to hear from you!
Moving can be very stressful, I hope yours goes smoothly. Sounds like you are doing the right planning so I think it will.
Your food plan sounds reasonable, and maybe you can make the move your new start, beginning now.
Moving can be very stressful, I hope yours goes smoothly. Sounds like you are doing the right planning so I think it will.
Your food plan sounds reasonable, and maybe you can make the move your new start, beginning now.
kittycat1
New member
Cate and Lama - thank you!
Yup there are many stressful changes, but then again - lot of new opportunities! New people, travel, more money for some stuff I want etc.
Rob - yup, my idea is to try to keep it as simple and affordable as I can.
Flyer - yup, if I could cut ALL carbs it could be perfect, but I decided to take more 'paleo' approach, fruits and potatoes, with addition of rice, quinoa, and other protein packed grains. But I definitely cut cakes, chocolate, ice cream, biscuits, chips and other snacks, bread, pizza, lasagna, pasta dishes, dumplings, all kinds of pastry.
TBH, while doing this fast I didn't eat too much bread, but always had some dessert at the end of meal, and I ended up having sugar every day which isn't good. Sometimes I woke up weirdly bloated in face and I didn't like that. I suppose I could eat sweets from time to time in the future, but having them every day sucks.
Yup there are many stressful changes, but then again - lot of new opportunities! New people, travel, more money for some stuff I want etc.
Rob - yup, my idea is to try to keep it as simple and affordable as I can.
Flyer - yup, if I could cut ALL carbs it could be perfect, but I decided to take more 'paleo' approach, fruits and potatoes, with addition of rice, quinoa, and other protein packed grains. But I definitely cut cakes, chocolate, ice cream, biscuits, chips and other snacks, bread, pizza, lasagna, pasta dishes, dumplings, all kinds of pastry.
TBH, while doing this fast I didn't eat too much bread, but always had some dessert at the end of meal, and I ended up having sugar every day which isn't good. Sometimes I woke up weirdly bloated in face and I didn't like that. I suppose I could eat sweets from time to time in the future, but having them every day sucks.
That's so major, the move! And a pretty solid change dietarily, too, to be giving up sugars and all starchy carbs in one hit - I guess the adrenaline charge of the move and settling into a new place will carry you through some of the stress of such a big dietary change. I'm definitely with you in giving up sugars (except in fresh fruit) - I did that for a month, and it was really good for me.
Best wishes for it all - and have fun decorating the new apartment!
Best wishes for it all - and have fun decorating the new apartment!
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