Cowboy's Diary

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Janvier said:
TGIF Cowboy!

I couldn't be happier for you!!! :party:

5 pounds away from your goal is HUGE!!! :hurray:

You have come SUCH a long way my goodness! You are truly inspiring and I am so happy that you now have the amazing life and amazing and HEALTHY body to go with it! I know exactly how you feel about self esteem scars, but your head will catch up with your body, just remind yourself everyday how accomplished you are and how worth it you are. I feel like if your head doesn't catch up with your body it can be a easy way to start slipping back into old habits, I'm a good example of that so just keep reminding yourself that you have done something that thousands of people just dream about. I'm very happy for you! Have an amazing Friday!! :waving:
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Thanks, Janvier!! Your words mean a lot to me. That is going to be the hard part I think is having my head catch up with my body. I still feel like the fat guy even though I am not anymore. I am sure with time that will change - at least I HOPE it does-lol. Thanks again!!
 
Good Monday Morning,

Well, my weekend went well. I am still between goals so I took my long run day ( Sunday ) off again. This is the last one though. I think I am going to sign up with the Running Room for their 1/2 marathon clinic. It doesn't start for a couple of weeks so I will be doing some advanced training in preparation. It is really hard for me to motivate myself without a goal. I am still running but find it easier to take a day off rather than get out and run. So now the goal is set- time to get my butt in gear.

Weather here is getting nicer so the outside running will be a lot easier. I LOVE running outside so it will make my training that much easier. I am not sure how I am going to do at this distance but time will tell.

I had a surreal and kind of a twilight zone moment on the weekend. I needed some new running clothes so I was at one of our department stores on Saturday. I was looking for a sleeveless dri-fit shirt ( size small) and some dri-fit running shorts-( long not short-lol). As it turned out they didn't have my size- could only find L and XL- what is with that- when I needed that size before they only had S and M- I can't win. Anyway, my wife was with me and she came over to me and said how about these. I said those are nice where did you find them. She pointed over to the boys wear- THE BOYS WEAR!!. I said there is no way I am going to fit into a Boys 18- I wore that size when I was 8-LOL. She made me try them on and I hate to admit it but they FIT!! I couldn't believe it- what is with that?? I think I am normal size so where do these really skinny guys get their clothes? I told her I will buy them-lol but it was a surreal and lets be honest, a weird moment.

That is it for today. I hope everyone has a GREAT MONDAY!!
 
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Good Monday morning Cowboy!

The running room sounds interesting. Is it just a class that you train with and eventually do a 1/2 marathon? It's great to have a new goal to work towards, I'm just like you where I need a goal and date to work towards to keep me motivated. Hopefully this does the trick for you.

I'm really glad the weather is shaping up, being outside during workouts makes them feel so much easier and the time just flies, I usually go for long speed walks, I'm hoping this summer to do some jogging.

I think that was a pretty epic moment for you this weekend. You've definitely come a super long way and sometimes it takes others like your wife to show you that by bringing you much smaller sizes then you could ever imagine that you could get into. I'm sure you would of never even considered looking in the boys department. Did you ever think you would be in the "skinny guy" category of clothing?? Surreal isn't it? I'm very happy for you, you have great things happening for you!
 
Janvier said:
Good Monday morning Cowboy!

The running room sounds interesting. Is it just a class that you train with and eventually do a 1/2 marathon? It's great to have a new goal to work towards, I'm just like you where I need a goal and date to work towards to keep me motivated. Hopefully this does the trick for you.

I'm really glad the weather is shaping up, being outside during workouts makes them feel so much easier and the time just flies, I usually go for long speed walks, I'm hoping this summer to do some jogging.

I think that was a pretty epic moment for you this weekend. You've definitely come a super long way and sometimes it takes others like your wife to show you that by bringing you much smaller sizes then you could ever imagine that you could get into. I'm sure you would of never even considered looking in the boys department. Did you ever think you would be in the "skinny guy" category of clothing?? Surreal isn't it? I'm very happy for you, you have great things happening for you!
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Hi Janvier,

The Running Room is a company out here that John Stanton started. They deal primarily with running stuff- shoes, t-shirts- shorts- etc. You don't have one in Toronto? Anyway, they run classes for the various running distances. They bring in qualified instructors that go over nutrition, how to run, shoes to wear, clothing etc. They also bring in lecturers to talk to you and you can aske them questions etc. Then they go an start the training but actually running one day a week. I have never taken one but from what I hear it is pretty good and it only costs about $70 for 12 weeks. I will let you know what I think once I am done.

Epic is right-lol. I guess I don't really think about it- you just concentrate on doing what you are doing and losing weight then you wake up one day buying clothes in the boys dept-haha. I always bought 18 husky in pants when I was 8 - that is what they called them back then- husky. I never thought I would be wearing a size 18 regular at 49 years old. Thanks for your kind words.
 
Wow! Cowboy, congrats on making it so close to your goal!! *hugs* That's so fabulous! You are working so hard, you have such an infectious and positive attitude, and are so encouraging, that it makes seeing you make this goal so wonderful! You deserve it! :)

I had a real LOL moment reading about the boy shorts!! hehe that's fabulous! Your wife is going to start thinking she's robbing the cradle! Her husband wearing boy's clothes! hehe! That is beyond fantastic!! It feels great shopping for clothes, and really noticing the change in the sizes! It gives you a moment where you really see how hard you've worked, and how far you've come! Congrats again!!

Your story and journey is very inspiring, cowboy. To know that you put all that hard work in, and have come this far- it really is a good feeling to read about you and your journey, and know that I can do it too :)

Every time I get on the treadmill, I hear a little cowboy voice (which is really weird, because I have no idea what you sound like)...but I hear it, and it says, "You can do it Jill! it will get easier!" hehehe..I'm excited! I have a plan to start running outside soon!! And I have a few girls that are teaming up with me to help me do it!! I think it's going to be fantastic! :)

Thank you again for all your help and encouragement! You give me the push when I can't do it :)

And congrats again on your fabulous journey!! You're an inspiration! :)
 
Tik said:
Wow! Cowboy, congrats on making it so close to your goal!! *hugs* That's so fabulous! You are working so hard, you have such an infectious and positive attitude, and are so encouraging, that it makes seeing you make this goal so wonderful! You deserve it! :)

I had a real LOL moment reading about the boy shorts!! hehe that's fabulous! Your wife is going to start thinking she's robbing the cradle! Her husband wearing boy's clothes! hehe! That is beyond fantastic!! It feels great shopping for clothes, and really noticing the change in the sizes! It gives you a moment where you really see how hard you've worked, and how far you've come! Congrats again!!

Your story and journey is very inspiring, cowboy. To know that you put all that hard work in, and have come this far- it really is a good feeling to read about you and your journey, and know that I can do it too :)

Every time I get on the treadmill, I hear a little cowboy voice (which is really weird, because I have no idea what you sound like)...but I hear it, and it says, "You can do it Jill! it will get easier!" hehehe..I'm excited! I have a plan to start running outside soon!! And I have a few girls that are teaming up with me to help me do it!! I think it's going to be fantastic! :)

Thank you again for all your help and encouragement! You give me the push when I can't do it :)

And congrats again on your fabulous journey!! You're an inspiration! :)
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Ah thanks, Jill. You are sweet!! It is nice to know I inspired someone else but I think you were inspired long before I came along. You are an inspiration in your own right- and so full of life. It is wonderful that you are back!! By the way- you CAN do this. I have complete faith in you!!

My voice- I sound like Darth Vader- WORK HARDER JILL ( Breath, Breath)-LOL. No I don't sound like Darth Vader but now you will hear him when you need it-LMAO. It is fun to run in a group - although I prefer to run alone- I have run in a group. It definitely motivates you because you don't want to jam out as everyone else counts on you to be there. It is a lot of fun and then don't forget to go out for a coffee or something after the run- low calorie of course-lol.
 
Cowboy - well done on setting a new goal! I'm with you on the stores never having the right size - no matter what size I am currently wearing. I think there are little elves running around hiding the proper size. You know - you could always meander over to the women's section if you get desperate. hehe (and I am totally serious - we have a store here REI that specializes in everything outdoorsy - I have found many of the same items in the mens section that were also in the womens section - of course, the womens section normally has more color choices).

I agree that running in a group is fun - my only experience being the recent 5k - and I didn't even run with anyone - it was just nice to be pushed along.
 
Jennifer72 said:
Cowboy - well done on setting a new goal! I'm with you on the stores never having the right size - no matter what size I am currently wearing. I think there are little elves running around hiding the proper size. You know - you could always meander over to the women's section if you get desperate. hehe (and I am totally serious - we have a store here REI that specializes in everything outdoorsy - I have found many of the same items in the mens section that were also in the womens section - of course, the womens section normally has more color choices).

I agree that running in a group is fun - my only experience being the recent 5k - and I didn't even run with anyone - it was just nice to be pushed along.
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Thanks, Jennifer. Yeah, I need a goal- figured that out this past couple of weeks without one. Women's wear?? I don't think so. It was bad enough in the little kids section-lol.

I am not sure about running with a group all the time. I enjoy my alone time. I may run one day a week with the group and then run on my own the other days- I will see.
 
Good Tuesday Morning,

Well I am back at it full blast. I have altered my training schedule until I start my 1/2 marathon training in a couple of weeks. So I ran 6 K yesterday. Boot camp is between sessions so i have this week off from it so today I am going to just run again. I will do my weight training tomorrow. I was finding it hard without an actual goal. Not doing the training, I am fine doing that, but putting that oompphh into it-lol. You know what I mean? I will be glad to get back into running for the 1/2.

I am excited to run a 1/2 marathon and I am pretty sure that will be the extent of my long distance running. I don't think I would be able to do a full marathon so the 1/2 marathon will be my full marathon-lol.

My eating has been good lately although I have been really hungry lately. I don't know why but I have been ignoring it-lol. I am not giving in-no matter what. Now that I am at 180 pounds my daily calories are going down so I can't eat the same than when I was at 255 or 320 pounds. I am not undereating ( well maybe some days I am) but overall I am eating around 1300-1500 calories sometimes more depending on what my exercise routine is. I have 5 pounds to go to goal and I am not sabotaging it when I am this close.

Well that is it for today. I hope everyone has a Great Tuesday!!
 
Good Tuesday Morning Cowboy!

It's great to hear that you're back at it at full blast. It's really motivating to see you pushing yourself until you start training for your 1/2 marathon, I'm ready to keep up with you and all of the hard work you're putting into it. I know exactly what you mean about working out but not putting oomph into it, thats what I feel like right now when I workout but the bottom line is that you're working out, you'll find the oomph and start putting it back in again don't worry.

I know how you feel about feeling hungry all the time, I started to feel like that alll the time when I got close to my goal weight. I really think it could just be mind tricks from the "old" you, who knows but I'm really glad you have your mind in the right place and know that nothing is going to get in the way of you getting to your goals. Maybe try to up your water with meals to help you feel more full, or sometimes I'll have a cup of tea or a small glass of skim milk instead of giving into a snack. You're doing amazing, keep working hard!
 
Janvier said:
Good Tuesday Morning Cowboy!

It's great to hear that you're back at it at full blast. It's really motivating to see you pushing yourself until you start training for your 1/2 marathon, I'm ready to keep up with you and all of the hard work you're putting into it. I know exactly what you mean about working out but not putting oomph into it, thats what I feel like right now when I workout but the bottom line is that you're working out, you'll find the oomph and start putting it back in again don't worry.

I know how you feel about feeling hungry all the time, I started to feel like that alll the time when I got close to my goal weight. I really think it could just be mind tricks from the "old" you, who knows but I'm really glad you have your mind in the right place and know that nothing is going to get in the way of you getting to your goals. Maybe try to up your water with meals to help you feel more full, or sometimes I'll have a cup of tea or a small glass of skim milk instead of giving into a snack. You're doing amazing, keep working hard!
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Hi Janvier,

Thanks for the tips. I have always been a big water drinker. I don't drink juice or anything like that- the occasional coffee but just water. I knew about that little trick but sometimes that just doesn't help- the last couple of days has been like that-lol. I just had to deal with feeling hungry and ignore it. You know I was thinking- if we ignore when we get those feelings - it won't hurt us. Sometimes you just have to feel hungry. Why do we have to feed ourselves when we have that feeling? It is like Pavlov's dog. As long as we know we are eating enough - which I am - feeling hungry is just like feeling sad or happy or whatever. Sorry got off on a tangent there-lol.

Anyway, I am NOT giving into it and am back to feeling okay yesterday and today. I appreciate your support especially from someone that is at goal already. I am getting there slowly and your help means the world to me.
 
Good Wednesday Morning,

Yesterday was another good day. Sun was shining and I think Spring is coming- it was about 6C here yesterday. People are wearing shorts and motorcycles are out-lol. Nothing like rushing things,

Eating was good - about 1400 calories. I have been trying to add some snacks through the day to slowly bring my calorie count up. I will need the extra calories if I am going to start with 1/2 marathon training. Nothing too high- just a little extra protein. I am going to have to start slowly upping my calories anyway so I can at least eat at maintenance - which is between 2000 and 3000 depending on the activity level. I can't see myself ever eating at 3000 calories again but 2000 is definitely attainable. I will slowly up my calories - don't want to do it too much right now as I still have 5 pounds to lose.

Wore my 'boy' shorts to the gym yesterday. Thank God no one knows the story-lol. Got home and my wife said 'told you that those shorts would fit'. She said they looked good and I finally have some shorts that fit my butt-LMAO. I didn't think my butt was that small but she assures me it is.

Ran my 6K at the gym. I am heading outside soon to run out there full time. I don't like running round and round that track inside- gets pretty boring. No boot camps this week but I got the training for the 1/2 marathon from one of the trainers. I still haven't signed up for the 1/2 marathon training at the Running Room as it doesn't start for a couple of weeks but the trainers said they had a copy I could use to get some advance work in. They are such nice people!! I guess I don't have to start at the beginning ( it is a 21 week program) as I just finished the 10K I can start at week 6. It will be an interesting journey I am sure. I just hope I can do this.

Sorry for the long post today- sometimes I get caught up in the moment-lol

Have a GREAT Wednesday!!
 
Congrats on doing so amazingly :) And thats how I feel about clothes... I went into a store and was like ah im probably a size 6 but I will try on a four if they dont have a six and the 3/4's fit. I know that a 3/4 is small but when I look at myself in the mirror I don't see how I could possibly fit. I still have my fat goggles on I suppose lol

Keep up the great work. Youre doing fantastically.
 
Hi Cowboy,

You are very welcome for the support, I am happy to give it :blush5:

And I think you're onto something with hunger just being like any other feeling. It makes a lot of sense. And when I do feel hungry really late at night and I know its ridiculous to be eating at like 11:30pm and I just ignore it and go to bed I know I'll be fine and I wake up feeling fine, I never ever race out of bed feeling overwhelmingly hungry the next day. So good point!

Great job with food and working out, your dedication is really great. lol @ your "boy shorts"- that sounds so adorible!

You are going to do amazing at the 1/2 marathon training, you've got it for sure and never doubt it. Look how far you've come!! You have the tools (new body and proper nutrition) to accomplish anything and you will accomplish it!

Happy Wednesday!!
 
shawnnam said:
Congrats on doing so amazingly :) And thats how I feel about clothes... I went into a store and was like ah im probably a size 6 but I will try on a four if they dont have a six and the 3/4's fit. I know that a 3/4 is small but when I look at myself in the mirror I don't see how I could possibly fit. I still have my fat goggles on I suppose lol

Keep up the great work. Youre doing fantastically.
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Thank you. Just seems funny for me to shop in the boys wear-lol. I know what you mean about the fat goggles- I still have mine on too. Hopefully my mind will catch up with my body and I can take the goggles off soon.
 
Janvier said:
Hi Cowboy,

You are very welcome for the support, I am happy to give it :blush5:

And I think you're onto something with hunger just being like any other feeling. It makes a lot of sense. And when I do feel hungry really late at night and I know its ridiculous to be eating at like 11:30pm and I just ignore it and go to bed I know I'll be fine and I wake up feeling fine, I never ever race out of bed feeling overwhelmingly hungry the next day. So good point!

Great job with food and working out, your dedication is really great. lol @ your "boy shorts"- that sounds so adorible!

You are going to do amazing at the 1/2 marathon training, you've got it for sure and never doubt it. Look how far you've come!! You have the tools (new body and proper nutrition) to accomplish anything and you will accomplish it!

Happy Wednesday!!
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Thanks for all your support, Janvier. It means a lot. I was thinking about the hunger feeling this last couple of days when I seemed to be hungry all the time. That is when it hit me- I couldn't possibly be actually hungry as I am not undereating ( at least not that day-lol). So I thought what could be triggering this? I guess if you look at feeling hungry the same way you look at feeling sad, happy, or angry (you don't eat Oreos to appease those feelings- you may eat BECAUSE of those feelings but not to get rid of them) you just feel sad or whatever. The feelings eventually go away on their own. I never really thought of it that way- had a bit of light bulb moment. Maybe it will help me with maintenance-lol.

I hope I can do this 1/2 marathon. It seems kind of a daunting task when I look at how far it is. When I run I like to run as fast as I can for the whole distance. Unfortunately, when you train for the 1/2 you have to do one day of a long, SLOW run. That is the day that you actually work your way up to the 21.1K. I just don't know if I can slow myself down-lol. I am going to give it a shot.

Thanks for stopping by!!
 
Good Thursday Morning,

I hope everyone had a great Wednesday. I was going to run yesterday but decided to do my X-Training instead. So I went on the elliptical at level 15 for 30 minutes and kept the speed at at least 6.3 or higher. It was a good workout. I was sweating pretty good by the time I was done.

Eating was good- around 1700 calories. It was all clean calories as I don't eat any cookies, cakes, etc.

I am noticing more toning in my abs, chest and love handles. Which is a good sign I guess. I don't know if they will ever be 'normal' at my age but it is nice to see them get smaller and tighter.

I will start with my pre-training for the 1/2 marathon on Sunday next week. I want to see how far I can run when I slow my pace down. It will be interesting to say the least.

That is it for today. Have a Great Thursday!!
 
cowboy48 said:
Thanks for all your support, Janvier. It means a lot. I was thinking about the hunger feeling this last couple of days when I seemed to be hungry all the time. That is when it hit me- I couldn't possibly be actually hungry as I am not undereating ( at least not that day-lol). So I thought what could be triggering this? I guess if you look at feeling hungry the same way you look at feeling sad, happy, or angry (you don't eat Oreos to appease those feelings- you may eat BECAUSE of those feelings but not to get rid of them) you just feel sad or whatever. The feelings eventually go away on their own. I never really thought of it that way- had a bit of light bulb moment. Maybe it will help me with maintenance-lol.

I hope I can do this 1/2 marathon. It seems kind of a daunting task when I look at how far it is. When I run I like to run as fast as I can for the whole distance. Unfortunately, when you train for the 1/2 you have to do one day of a long, SLOW run. That is the day that you actually work your way up to the 21.1K. I just don't know if I can slow myself down-lol. I am going to give it a shot.

Thanks for stopping by!!
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Your light bulb moment gave me the same light bulb moment lol, I really like the theory and I'm going to try to continue looking at it that way especially when the cravings are kicking in. I think it will definitely help you with maintenance.

I can see how your 1/2 marathon seems daunting but I'm sure losing weight initially seemed daunting as well right? You will do what ever you set your mind to do. I do the same thing when I do run but it will be a great learning experience, there are only upsides to the whole thing.

Your day yesterday sounded great. I'm happy for you about the toning! Have a wonderful day!
 
Janvier said:
Your light bulb moment gave me the same light bulb moment lol, I really like the theory and I'm going to try to continue looking at it that way especially when the cravings are kicking in. I think it will definitely help you with maintenance.

I can see how your 1/2 marathon seems daunting but I'm sure losing weight initially seemed daunting as well right? You will do what ever you set your mind to do. I do the same thing when I do run but it will be a great learning experience, there are only upsides to the whole thing.

Your day yesterday sounded great. I'm happy for you about the toning! Have a wonderful day!
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LOL. I hope it does help with maintenance- I am still unsure how I am going to get my mind around it. I am not there yet but getting closer each week.

Yeah when I first started the weight loss journey, you are right it seemed daunting. I did it though so I know I can do whatever I put my mind too. That being said I don't know if my body wants to-lol. I am sure I can do it and I will to the best of my ability as I need to have a goal of some kind to motivate me. I am hoping that the 1/2 marathon training will help with the toning as well. I guess time will tell. Thanks for your kind words. You have a wonderful day too!!
 
Great Job, Cowboy on training for a 1/2 marathon! That's fantastic! I often try and ask myself the same question with regard to hunger and food. Sometimes, I can avoid the hunger, other times, I can't and can't find the reason as to why I am eating or desiring it at that time. Eating to hide from what I ask myself sometimes? To avoid what emotion? Why?
 
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