Cowboy's Diary

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cate said:
:iagree: You really can change your habits if you set your mind to do it. Cravings do go away. I steer well clear of cakes etc & love vegetables. I couldn't imagine not having them every day. Hope your cold vanishes soon cowboy!
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Thanks, Cate. That is the key- setting your mind to it.
 
brawny77 said:
I think my taste buds are getting more sensitive.
I used to love those bold favors of spicy chips but now those are way too over seasoned for me I like more subtle Flavors now...lately I am on a bell pepper and fresh mushroom kick...I add them to many dishes
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Hi Brawny,

They say when you stop eating junk your taste buds actually do become more sensitive so you can taste and enjoy food more. Not sure if that is true but I know I can taste food better now. I love mushrooms and bell peppers too. My favorite is salad of all varieties. I eat a lot of salad. Sante Fe, Spinach, Caesar, Taco occasionally, etc. etc. etc. Love them all.
 
Little John said:
I've been fantasizing about the Perfect Salad lately. Something salty/vinegary and fresh. Maybe I'll grab some lettuce on the way home tonight.
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My new salad that I like is Spinach with tomatoes , peppers, mushrooms, whatever other veggie I have around, sunflower seeds, and goat cheese. Topped off with homemade Maple Balsamic made with real maple syrup- YUM.
 
Little John said:
That sounds good, though if it was me, I'd replace the spinach with wild greens. Something about spinach's texture...
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I am not really a texture eater. I know lots of people that are. I have had the salad with wild greens and it is just as good.
 
A little bit of a rant:

I have been looking over some diaries and noticed there seems to be a reoccurring feeling a lot of us have- lack of worthiness. I don't know where it comes from but speaking personally I think I have always felt like people are better than me because they are better looking, thinner, smarter and everything I wasn't. I have always been the fat guy. From the time I was a little kid. I got picked on at school and always felt inferior to everyone. I had a reputation as the 'Nice Guy" or " Jolly Guy" which I guess is a nice reputation to have but I was miserable inside. I never felt worthy. Even now, I have this inferiority complex. It makes me quiet and reserved and withdrawn. I have come out of my shell a little as I have gotten older. I don't really care what others think of me as I realize now that is their problem - not mine. But I think that the feeling I had growing up has changed me and I don't really like it.

Is anyone else out there feeling this way? Is this a side effect of being overweight? Maybe it is. I know we live in a society that shows us what beautiful is or how everyone should look or be. Why can't we treat everyone with kindness and respect and love? Half of our world problems can be solved with some caring, love, and forgiveness.

Social media has made it so much easier to be mean to people. To bully them from behind a computer screen. I wonder how many people would say the things they post if they were standing in front of that person.

This world has become a very chaotic place. Everyone wants everything now. They don't want to have to wait. In our haste we overlook people and their feelings. Let's all slow down - hug your kids, go and take your grandmother or grandfather out for coffee, give a homeless person some money, help someone without them asking. Let's spread some kindness around and try to treat ourselves and others with some love and respect.

Rant over: Did any of this make sense? I think I may have eaten a donut or something and the sugar went right to my fingers-lol.
 
:iagree: with all of the above cowboy.
cowboy48 said:
but speaking personally I think I have always felt like people are better than me because they are better looking, thinner, smarter and everything I wasn't.
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I wasn't the fat kid though.
& especially I agree with this-
cowboy48 said:
Let's all slow down - hug your kids, go and take your grandmother or grandfather out for coffee, give a homeless person some money, help someone without them asking. Let's spread some kindness around and try to treat ourselves and others with some love and respect.
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I think that's what we are doing here as well. It's time we all learned to love one another & ourselves. We are spreading kindness in this community & I don't think any of us should underestimate the power of kindness.
It all made sense!
 
Thanks for the rant, cowboy. We're always our own worst critic. I'm way too often down on myself, refuse to take compliments and refrain from giving any for fear of what may (or may not) come of it.

We've got a great community here and I truly get a ton of encouragement both directly and indirectly from the people here.

And I agree with LaMa, but I also think it's a two way street. I think we lose self-confidence when we are overweight, but I think we allow ourselves to become overweight due to our lack of self-confidence. At least that's how it's worked for me. I don't feel worthy so I let myself indulge, then I continue to overindulge and feel guilty and worse about myself. It's a terrible cycle.

I was also the type in school who got not necessarily bullied, but I was picked on for not being cool enough, or not wearing brand name clothes or hanging around the "right" people.

If it means anything, the few times you've posted on my diary have been very welcome and I automatically thought highly of you. I could always use more positivity in my life and I'm here if you ever need to rant. :D
 
cowboy48 said:
Did any of this make sense?
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I don't know how much of my feeling is worthlessness, but the more weight I put on, the less interested I am in being seen in public. Maybe it's that the belt gets painful, or the shirt lifts up and exposes my gut? Maybe I don't want to look like "that guy" that I fear looking like, but I know I'm getting closer to him (or, in come cases, surpassing him). Maybe every time I sit in a booth, there's a better and better chance that my gut hits the table, even presses against it.

Stuff like that does add up, and I think once you start to lose self-esteem, you start losing self-worth. I try not to let it get to me, but it's unavoidable at times.
 
cate said:
:iagree: with all of the above cowboy.

I wasn't the fat kid though.
& especially I agree with this-

I think that's what we are doing here as well. It's time we all learned to love one another & ourselves. We are spreading kindness in this community & I don't think any of us should underestimate the power of kindness.
It all made sense!
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Kindness does go a long way. Thanks Cate!
 
LaMaria said:
I would say being overweight is a side effect, not the main thing...
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I am not sure. Like the chicken or the egg scenario-lol. If we weren't overweight would we feel worthy and love ourselves. I am sure there is lots of overweight people that are full of confidence but I wasn't one of them. Still not!
 
Mowens1984 said:
Thanks for the rant, cowboy. We're always our own worst critic. I'm way too often down on myself, refuse to take compliments and refrain from giving any for fear of what may (or may not) come of it.

We've got a great community here and I truly get a ton of encouragement both directly and indirectly from the people here.

And I agree with LaMa, but I also think it's a two way street. I think we lose self-confidence when we are overweight, but I think we allow ourselves to become overweight due to our lack of self-confidence. At least that's how it's worked for me. I don't feel worthy so I let myself indulge, then I continue to overindulge and feel guilty and worse about myself. It's a terrible cycle.

I was also the type in school who got not necessarily bullied, but I was picked on for not being cool enough, or not wearing brand name clothes or hanging around the "right" people.

If it means anything, the few times you've posted on my diary have been very welcome and I automatically thought highly of you. I could always use more positivity in my life and I'm here if you ever need to rant. :D
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Thanks Mowens. I think it is important for all of us to show as much support as possible here. That is what this forum is. There are some really great people on here and even though most of us have never met we are all here for the same reason.

I think a lot of us get in that downward cycle. We are feeling bad so we eat to make ourselves feel better and then we continue to gain weight and feel bad about ourselves again. It is a hard cycle to break but we can all do it. I think it is important to feel good about ourselves no matter what we weigh. If we can do that then losing weight becomes something else entirely. It becomes more physical than mental. It becomes about just losing weight and feeling healthier and stronger.
 
Little John said:
I don't know how much of my feeling is worthlessness, but the more weight I put on, the less interested I am in being seen in public. Maybe it's that the belt gets painful, or the shirt lifts up and exposes my gut? Maybe I don't want to look like "that guy" that I fear looking like, but I know I'm getting closer to him (or, in come cases, surpassing him). Maybe every time I sit in a booth, there's a better and better chance that my gut hits the table, even presses against it.

Stuff like that does add up, and I think once you start to lose self-esteem, you start losing self-worth. I try not to let it get to me, but it's unavoidable at times.
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I hear you loud and clear LJ. I was there too. Worried about bending over to pick something off the floor in case my crack was going to show because I couldn't get pants that fit me right. That was me. Worried about going out in public because I was to heavy to really do anything easily.

Funny thing is now that I am 175 pounds I still feel that way. I have been heavier way way longer than I have been smaller so it takes a long time for the brain to catch up. Hopefully if I stay smaller that feeling goes away but I am not sure it will.

That being said it won't stop me from being kinder to people. I have always been an easy going guy that really likes people. I have never cared what nationality, gender, occupation, or social status you are. People deserve kindness and compassion no matter who or what they are.

Everyone on this forum can lose weight. Learn to love yourself no matter what you look like or what it says on the scale. If you can do that you have half the battle won.
 
brawny77 said:
Did anyone mention avoiding mirrors and staying out of photos?
That's what I do.
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Oh man. This is me to a T. I HATE having my picture taken. My son just got married a couple of weeks ago and I had to have my picture taken. The wedding was fantastic but I hated all the pictures-lol.
 
I avoid cameras like they're loaded guns. When I do have to be in a pic, I'm thankful I'm tall so I can go in the back row.
 
Little John said:
I avoid cameras like they're loaded guns. When I do have to be in a pic, I'm thankful I'm tall so I can go in the back row.
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I hide in the back row too. Usually try to hide my big head in behind someone else's-lol.
 
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