Trying to find me

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Cate said:
One thing I think most of us agree on is posting in here helps with our motivation, possibly due to feeling accountable to people who do care. Would it help to post your bed-time? Getting enough sleep really does help with weight-loss :)
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I totally agree with sleep and weightloss or just health in general being linked . The way I like to look at that is it is just going to get better from this point on , just might take me some retraining lol.
 
aiminglow said:
I'm not surprised you're tired, with child-associated sleeping trouble - let alone with six lovely children to care for through the day! Possibly the before-bedtime eating habit is linked strongly to that tiredness - and to you at last having a moment or two to yourself, and therefore wanting to indulge, to be the one getting some of the goodness and comfort you've been handing out in bucketloads all day!

If that strikes a chord, maybe think out ahead of time, every day, something really good and comforting and kind* you can have for yourself that isn't unhelpful food - maybe it'll be a twenty minute skin-care routine with beautifully lavish creams and unguents, maybe it'll be practising ikebana uninterrupted for half an hour, maybe it'll be putting on (with headphones, until your two-year-old has really learned to sleep!) whatever music you like until you feel like sleeping, maybe it'll be food after all - but food that's good and nutritious and doesn't hurt your teeth! Whatever works - but not the unhelpful food, because that will just get you down in the end.

*kindness - there's a sub-thread here which is all about being kind to ourselves ( https://weight-loss.fitness.com/threads/be-kind-to-yourself-every-day-starting-now.113077/ ) - and see Cate's motto above!
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You hit the nail on the head there . It is a lot to do with sitting down and being by myself and "treating" myself after a long day of giving to my family . That is exactly it . I like your suggestion of trying to change what that "treat" looks like and if I make it somthing to do upstairs in my room like my nails or a skin care routine ( I could use one ) then maybe it will remind me to go to bed earlier too because I will already be close by . Thanks a lot for that observation and advice !
 
Today eating didn't go too bad . Still some mistakes but not to a depressing point . Lot's of snow today so did some shovelling and sled pulling and thought about how great it will be if by next winter this doesn't wind me quite as much anymore , although the kids just get heavier every year so maybe it will be just as hard lol. I oddly am not looking for my nightly fix tonight , was just really looking forward to just sitting down with my water and my show tonight . Really enjoying writing here and for all the advice and support I have received . Thank you all so much ! Now I am off to try and go to bed earlier .
 
I hope you got to bed earlyish. It's a hard habit to break. That peace at the end of the day when your kids are asleep is bliss, but sleep is even better.
 
Made my kids pancakes this morning , that was much harder not to eat than I thought it would be . I just kept putting it off though saying I would eat one in 5 minutes then I would have one once the kids were all done , and with so many growing kids there were none left over ( which is what I was hoping for ) so made it through pancakes . Faltered later though with pretzels which was frustrating because I don't even like pretzels that much they are just okay but I was standing in the kitchen absent mindedly eating some just because the bag was left out . I hate how it is so on my mind all day just repeating to myself "don't eat that , it is not good " or " don't get that , you aren't even hungry " how long before it isn't an all day effort ?
 
Well, partly well done! :) That delaying till your lovely kids ate it all up was a clever strategy to start with - but I expect the feeling of having "missed out" is why you faltered later with the pretzels, which you didn't even really want. (Oh, I really get that, from my own sort-of similar experience - though not the kids aspect.)
Can I suggest (I really don't want to sound hectoring here!) that when you see this sort of situation looming you try hard not to think "I won't eat these yummy pancakes! I'll deny myself these delicious syrupy morsels!", but instead think "I'm going to have my much more delicious [treaty, diety thing] later on, when all these dear ones are off to school and down for a nap".
And really follow through with something very, very good for yourself - I don't know your tastes or your budget or shopping options, but what I'm visualising right now is a bowl of cut-up canteloupe and gorgeous strawberries, mixed up together, just fresh and by themselves - pure, taste-sensation! :)
 
aiminglow said:
Well, partly well done! :) That delaying till your lovely kids ate it all up was a clever strategy to start with - but I expect the feeling of having "missed out" is why you faltered later with the pretzels, which you didn't even really want. (Oh, I really get that, from my own sort-of similar experience - though not the kids aspect.)
Can I suggest (I really don't want to sound hectoring here!) that when you see this sort of situation looming you try hard not to think "I won't eat these yummy pancakes! I'll deny myself these delicious syrupy morsels!", but instead think "I'm going to have my much more delicious [treaty, diety thing] later on, when all these dear ones are off to school and down for a nap".
And really follow through with something very, very good for yourself - I don't know your tastes or your budget or shopping options, but what I'm visualising right now is a bowl of cut-up canteloupe and gorgeous strawberries, mixed up together, just fresh and by themselves - pure, taste-sensation! :)
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That sounds like a much healthier way mentally to look at not eating pancakes lol I will try to think of something else that I would like to have instead but at the moment I don't know what that looks like as a healthy option ( but I am sure there is something out there lol)
 
Busy day today which was good for not having time to snack on stuff . I feel I did eat too much at supper but at least what it was was too many of the veggies but still a few not a comfortable feeling being too full. I am going to try to weigh myself once a week. I want to weigh myself everyday sometimes twice A day but I worry if I see no difference everyday or worse an increase even a tiny .1 of a pound that i will be more tempted to give up thinking" it isn't making a difference anyways !" So I think I can hold off for a week .
 
Good on you, for a day well spent - and also for circumventing that scales-trap, when a tiny increase can lead to thoughts of giving up. Sending you good vibes for holding off on the scales for the week! :)
 
Why is it that I can be doing great all day . One minute thinking "this is it, I am doing it and it is working out great !" And then the next minute be ready to give in entirely and feel like it is just unobtainable . The day has gone fine for eating I think , I am sure I eat a little more than I realize , just because I will finish an apple one kid started or another kid doesn't like the yolk from the hard boiled eggs So I eat that part when they hand it to me .I am getting better though I am only eating stuff from them that is good food ,and have been doing okay with when handed and half eaten cookie or little bit of noodles left in a bowl I have been strong enough to say no to that so far . I have been having an egg and a piece of fruit for breakfast , drinking a protein shake for lunch ( I am sure all the little bits I don't even realize I am eating like the half bananas and what-not from the kids equals the rest of a lunch ) then supper is usually a piece of chicken or whatever we are having that night and salad or just veggie's.
 
That's a great step, to be chucking the half-eaten cookie etc - the hard part is going to be chucking the good nutritious stuff, like half a banana!
I truly, truly get why a busy mother hates to see food wasted (let alone for budget reasons), but this is a behaviour I have identified in myself as "treating myself like a rubbish bin". It's a habit I'm trying hard to break for reasons of self-respect as well as nutrition! (Also trying, for the same reasons, to break the habit of denying myself the freshest, most appealing food, and giving it to, or "saving" it for, others, while I eat up the not-so-appealing other thing.)
 
aiminglow said:
That's a great step, to be chucking the half-eaten cookie etc - the hard part is going to be chucking the good nutritious stuff, like half a banana!
I truly, truly get why a busy mother hates to see food wasted (let alone for budget reasons), but this is a behaviour I have identified in myself as "treating myself like a rubbish bin". It's a habit I'm trying hard to break for reasons of self-respect as well as nutrition! (Also trying, for the same reasons, to break the habit of denying myself the freshest, most appealing food, and giving it to, or "saving" it for, others, while I eat up the not-so-appealing other thing.)
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Oh you get me lol I do the same thing with leaving the best for everyone else and yes I hate the thought of food being wasted , which is why it has been hard to let even the goodies be thrown out but I keep telling myself they are wasted food if I throw it out but also if I eat it because I didn't need it . The funny thing is when you say you have the same problems my first thought is to say to you " you eat the the reddest apple , you eat the best piece of whatever it is, you deserve it !" but then I can not do it myself . Hopefully we both conquer this !
 
Thanks, Amy for saying what I would have said. I think it's even more important to consider your own health when you are a parent. Not only do you need to be healthy to look after children, but you also then set a good example to them. I know it is not easy.
 
FindingMe said:
I hate the thought of food being wasted , which is why it has been hard to let even the goodies be thrown out but I keep telling myself they are wasted food if I throw it out but also if I eat it because I didn't need it
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I have had that problem, it took a while for me to understand that eating it rather than throwing it out was worse, some times much worst. Now I throw away without guilt. Best of luck with the kids, sounds like you are doing fine with a very big responsibility.
 
Well the day went fine but evening came and I stumbled , I had a rice krispie square and then suddenly I was searching for something , anything else . I did not realize it would set me off like that . Now i know I for sure I can't say "sure I will just have this one small thing" I didn't get too crazy before I was able to pull myself together, although I feel bad mentally and stomach wise now . I didn't think I had been doing this new diet long enough to make a difference , yet before I could have eaten the stuff I ate tonight no problem but now I feel gross and sick . I swear it seems the minute I realize I am finally doing well at turning my eating around I then reach for chips or chocolate or whatever . Like some form of self sabotage? Why do I do this ?
 
Sorry to hear about the stumble - but really good that you've found the positives in it:
-that you didn't really go off the rails
- that you now know for sure that something small can set you off
- that your stomach/appetite has actually already shrunk a bit! (Yay!)

Don't beat yourself up, and say "self-sabotage" - maybe it is, a bit (I don't know) but also tonight it could very well be that:
- you were tireder than you thought
- you didn't have that truly delicious diety treat on hand for your relaxing time, or not enough of it
- you didn't get the relaxing time at all
- any one of a dozen other reasons.

Courage, amiga! Of course there's a stumble or two along the way, but you've begun well, and you are a strong, impressive woman, and you're definitely going to triumph! :hurray:
 
FindingMe said:
Why do I do this ?
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We're all mere mortals. Don't give up. Just move right along. You deserve to be healthy & fit. You can do this :)
 
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