Put that down, fatty! (again!)

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Thanks Cate :( I just feel like a tool. She's so old and sweet but I barely have time to see friends and I just don't like her very much (which is so mean) and she is overtly religious and forces it down my throat and I don't want to spend any time with her outside of the Soup Kitchen. Bleh. I've left the voicemail now so will see if she returns my call.. I'm willing to help still with the book but it needs to be on Thursdays when I'm already at volunteering and it's not eating into my private time. Thanks for being kind - I just needed a vent.
 
:iagree::iagree::iagree: The Amazing Cate said it all in way less waffle than me lol
 
katehunibun said:
Heya I totally get why you left her a message. I too have a massive problem with saying 'no' to anyone and it stresses me out totally when i end up doing way too much. at least you told her and you are being honest. You, like me just can't bring yourself to actually say it to their face. that is a really really hard thing to do so don't beat yourself up about it. deep breath and move on. She'll get over it. You do sound like you have a crazy busy life and you volunteer every week on top of work and uni. That in itself is enough.
I am an Explorer Scout leader and sometimes its just doing stuff on a Friday night but most of the time i am spending hours doing stuff for them like organising camps and dealing with idiot parents so i totally understand how we can let ourselves get into doing to much.
Don't beat yourself up about it my lovely. xoxo
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So glad I'm not alone Kate - I find it so hard saying no. I just feel cowardly for not saying it to her face but it feels so mean. I used to do Scout stuff too! How strange! We must take time for ourselves, we are precious! xx
 
You're not being mean. You're donating precious hours of your life to something that's not the difference between life and death for her. That's being nice, in my book. Even if what she really wants is alllll your hours. And Yank's. And probably all your friends'.
 
You girls are awesome. Shaking off the guilt and have given the pizza I made to Yank and chosen something proper for dinner. No guilt eating for me!
 
5th January

Breakfast: satsumas (123)
Lunch: chick pea curry leftovers (220)
Dinner: quinoa, pumpkin seeds, sunflower seeds, brown rice, broccoli, mushrooms. 1 small slice low-cal pizza (568)
Snack: 187ml white wine, small piece of shortbread (223)

Total: 1134
Steps: 12,000

Too few calories - didn't help that I was late home from work. Tomorrow will be better as there will be POPCORN at the cinema.
 
That old woman will be fine. Helping her on a Thursday is completely reasonable. You don't owe her anything!
 
I understand why you're beating yourself up over the old woman, but you needn't do it. You have too many things on your plate, and your own life needs to take precedence over an almost-stranger's! Maybe you revisit her needs when your life settles out, but for now, it's OK to be a little selfish!
 
Thanks Emily & LJ - she's not called me back so imagine she will pretend she hasn't got my message! Maaaaah

Went to see Arrival at an independent cinema last night with Yank and a friend - was really awesome. Made me feel really sad for some reason although I think the fact that I had a few drinks with work beforehand didn't help. I came home at 10 and just went straight to bed as felt really grotty. Drinking does not agree with me after a week of being sensible. The cinema we went to doesn't have popcorn so Yank went over to the other cinema in town and brought me some there and carried it over in his rucksack. He's adorable.

Have a Uni online tutorial starting in 10 mins so will just do yesterdays food quickly and post later.

6th January

Breakfast: mandarins and jelly (179)
Lunch: Chickpea curry leftovers and muller light melon and mango yog (309)
Dinner: skipped
Snacks: cinema popcorn, small wine x 4 (951)

Total: 1439
Steps: 8000 (too low!)
Alcohol: 4 x 187mls white wine. two at pub and two before cinema in cinema bar.
Weight: 194.5lbs

Weight lost this week (sun-sun) - 4.5lbs
 
Your steps may have been low but your real-food calories were even lower :D Isn´t it crazy how quickly wine&popcorn can add up compared to fruit and lunch?
 
Absolutely mental, LaMa - popcorn was like 500 on it's own..sickening!

Today I have not moved from my sofa! Did my University tutorial this morning which was a fucking nightmare - tutor couldn't get his audio sorted so it was a garbled, jumbled mess from start to finish. Not helpful at all. Then I managed to get my essay mostly sorted..just need to sort referencing and make sure I've hit all my learning objectives. So I did that for about 9 hours today, Yank put some shelves up whilst looking gorgeously manly and we've been snuggled on the sofa watching the new Sherlock (I am a total Cumberbitch...Benedict is all the sexy) and Always Sunny and Modern Family and just vegging out. Steps as a result have been very poor! But getting up early tomorrow to go to these woods about 90 minutes away for a long country walk and some fresh air :) Weigh in for Week 1 will be tomorrow morning!

Breakfast: skipped
Lunch: spring vegetable soup (36)
Dinner: lemon/brown rice, brocoli, mushrooms, red pepper, half-fat halloumi and 1/3 of a naan bread (729)
Snacks: salt&vinegar graze box, 2 x 187ml white wine (381)

Total: 1146
 
Sunflower_ said:
Absolutely mental, LaMa - popcorn was like 500 on it's own..sickening!

Today I have not moved from my sofa! Did my University tutorial this morning which was a fucking nightmare - tutor couldn't get his audio sorted so it was a garbled, jumbled mess from start to finish. Not helpful at all. Then I managed to get my essay mostly sorted..just need to sort referencing and make sure I've hit all my learning objectives. So I did that for about 9 hours today, Yank put some shelves up whilst looking gorgeously manly and we've been snuggled on the sofa watching the new Sherlock (I am a total Cumberbitch...Benedict is all the sexy) and Always Sunny and Modern Family and just vegging out. Steps as a result have been very poor! But getting up early tomorrow to go to these woods about 90 minutes away for a long country walk and some fresh air :) Weigh in for Week 1 will be tomorrow morning!

Breakfast: skipped
Lunch: spring vegetable soup (36)
Dinner: lemon/brown rice, brocoli, mushrooms, red pepper, half-fat halloumi and 1/3 of a naan bread (729)
Snacks: salt&vinegar graze box, 2 x 187ml white wine (381)

Total: 1146
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I love reading your menus. I get a chuckle when i see wine listed as a food. I know it isbut it still gives me a chuckle for some strange reason. :)
 
Ha, I didn't know what the internet was on about till I watched a few episodes of Sherlock. He is ONLY attractive as Sherlock. And that's cos he's a smart bastard with issues, which is how I like em! ;)

Going to see Arrival on Monday, I will let you know my thoughts. Hope it doesn't make me weepy!
 
That is so funny Emily because it's exactly what I think. He is only attractive as Sherlock & that's because the character is a smart bastard with issues! :D I find intelligence & wit very sexy!
 
hello! ive been reading your diary for a few days now... (im not a creeper i promise lol) is soooo fun to read you.

two quick things to say before i go to bed:

*i LOVED arrival, i thought it was a great movie while my husband fell asleep at the movie theater..if it has no explosions and super heroes flying is not his type of movie.

* your husband is a sweethart for bringing you the popcorn.. seriously.

ill write something longer tomorrow.. xoxo
 
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