Motivation and moving forward!

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LaMaria said:
Hey Looking4Change and welcome to the diaries!
Great to hear you´re off to such a good start ....LaMa
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Hi LaMa

I'm new here. To do a diary, we just start a thread and then keep adding to our own thread right? We don't need to keep starting a new thread all the time do we? I'm a little confused about the diaries.
 
Looking4Change said:
Does anyone ever feel impatient with losing weight...
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Wow! Good job staying sober. I admire you. I have not gotten to the point of being addicted to anything, but I know how hard it is, I've watched family members go sober, and friends. I'm proud of you for being diligent and strong, and knowing inside deep down that you're worth it!

P.S. I'm not impatient with losing weight. That causes stress and I don't need that kinda pressure. I'm loving myself and taking it one day at a time and hoping I lose weight, but not going to step on a scale and monitor it.
 
On a Friday afternoon after a long stressful day up London working, I was approached from 4pm onwards with messages of friends asking me if I fancy a swift couple of beers before heading back, somehow I have resisted. A small feat for your average human, but a huge step for this gentlemen! Onwards and upwards! Friday night watching Netflix instead! :)
 
Looking4Change said:
On a Friday afternoon ... :)
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I'm proud of you! Often times we think of going out and having drinks as a reward for a hard week, and this is where our thinking leads us to being over weight as we often reward ourselves WAY too often. Now when I look in the mirror I say to myself "I have really lived a life full of many rewards! look at this belly!" I rub it and exclaim "Well, it's all bought and paid for!" I carry my "rewards" for the hard life I have lived around my waistline now and think to myself that I don't need to feel deprived for not being rewarded any longer, I have so many rewards sitting on my body (fat cells) that I think now I can give back in some other way. I think spiritually, like this... I have been blessed in my lifetime and have given myself many rewards, but now it is time to give myself a different reward, the reward of good health and fitness. My body deserves it. I deserve it. When I think of going out with friends for a beer now, I think to myself about the calories going into my body, and the way that will not help me achieve my goals. I struggle with this because a lot of times I want to say to myself "Oh the heck with it! One day out won't hurt!" And, while this is true, it's only true for people who have control over their eating and their health, who are in top shape and healthy, they can afford a night out, without worry but for people like me who have lost control, I'm not doing myself any good by giving in to my desires or urges to indulge. I'm only showing that I have no more self control, and that is what I am working towards these days. Self control. See, the thing is... I know better. I know what is good for me, and shoving bagels in my face 6 times per week and drinking a few beers on Friday night and eating pizza the other days isn't self control, not at all. That's pure indulgence.

You have to ask yourself, "What is my intention? Is my intention to get fit, or is my intention to indulge?" At some point we have to look into the mirror and say to ourselves that it's time to change our intentions, and it's time to give our bodies a break and treat our bodies right.

You're doing great, you know your weaknesses and you're staying strong. You are an inspiration, and I thank you for that! If you can do it, I can do it!
 
Wow, how epic are you! what a response :) 100 percent not an inspiration btw, just trying to be good for once, been naughty all my life, I do a similar thing as u though, I tell myself I’ve had a lifetime of indulgence and think it’s now or never to get fit. I’m of the opinion the indulgences can wait for a while at least until I’m in a position of complete control and good health.
Another thing I always tell myself is stop seeing food as anything other then fuel, Having that mindset breaks the emotional connection food had over me. I start think about it in simple terms, plenty of other things in life to get enjoyment from that don’t harm me.
Set mini goals as well, I seem to just strive for small targets all day long, how many steps, how quick I can get home walking, how much I can bench. I always have a competitive streak in me so always good to challenge myself.
 
Looking4Change said:
Wow, how epic are you! ...
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Keep it up. I need to cling to you people who inspire me. Because I am weak.. oh so weak... I truly need all the help I can get. My boss just came in the door and told me that he was so proud of me for manning the ship. I work in IT, and it's a very busy office, and all of our techs were in training or on vacation today. It was just me. The whole day. By myself handling all the incoming calls and work orders and thankfully it was Friday (it's slower on Fridays) but anyways, he said to me, what are your plans tonight? I told him about going home and baking some chicken and potatoes, and he said he'd treat me to a beer at the local brewery tonight for all my hard work. My boss is the best! I think to myself, wow this is a test! I just wrote about self control, and now I am going to let my boss buy me a beer. I feel like such a cheater. Like, I'm cheating by not following my own advice.

Today I did not have lunch, because I had to run to the bank, and for breakfast I had 1 cup of coffee with no creamer and no sugar and 1 strawberry pop tart (horrible I know but I had it in my desk), and two tangerines. It's now 4:21pm and that's all I have eaten today. I'm going to let my boss buy me a beer and I am going to opt for something light for dinner with protein, as they do serve food there. But this is not a norm for me. I rarely ever go out ever, and I rarely ever drink beer. How funny though (smacks my forehead) that this situation is happening to me. I feel so guilty.

I couldn't say no to my boss because he really wanted to do something to thank me for my hard work. He's a married man, and I love his wife to pieces and they're like family to me. He's like a brother to me, in many ways. I am truly blessed in my job and my coworkers are amazing. I will go this time and think about calories the whole entire time.

I'm one of those people that don't like to go out and socialize much. I wake up, go to work, come home, stay home, go to bed and then return to work again. I read a lot. I am a hermit. I feel like my boss really knows me, and he knows I never really go anywhere, I stay home all weekend in the winter when the weather is horrible (raining like crazy here lately) and I just don't socialize. My work is where I socialize. So, if I turned him down now after the offer to go out I think he'd feel bad that I worked so hard today and just went home afterwards. He's very active, social and fit.

Don't be like me. Be better than me. I hope one day I am on track with my diet and not being a hypocrite. If I fall down, just know I will do better next time. I will. I promise.

This is something I will think about the whole weekend now and push myself to do better.
 
Don’t be so harsh on yourself it’s not easy. Got a similar predicament next Thursday. Manager wants to take the team for a drink. I am in IT as well, and am the complete opposite of u, don’t naturally fit in at work, everyone is soooooo technical and without being rude quite geeky. Been at this new role for around 6 months so when ever they do go drinks I always feel obliged. 100 percent i know one of the reason they hired me was for my social nature, so don’t want to be a complete let down 6 months in. I’m gonna go, but have one beer and call it a day.
My point is sometimes it can’t be avoided. Life has to come first, as much I want to reach my health target, I do have other targets as well which are constantly competiting so have to have some flex.
Also and I do apologise in advance if this comes across as forward, I would strongly suggest going out and socialising more. As much as reading and being comfortable in your own company is a good trait to hold, socialising outside of work is a awesome thing, nice to just kick back and chat rubbish all day without thinking about work. Personally keeps me sane, but different strokes and all that i guess. As long as u enjoy life it’s all good stuff. Right weight lifting time! 6:30 am on a Saturday morning :(
 
Going out for drinks with colleagues is something that´s simply required sometimes. It´s part of the job even if you like your colleagues and it happens outside of work hours. It´s not an indulgence unless you use it as an excuse to drink a lot and eat whatever. As long as it doesn´t happen every week it´s usually enough to have a sensible look at the menu beforehand, check the calories on various drinks and dishes, and find something that you´ll both enjoy and is worth the calories for you. It definitely isn´t the easiest part of losing weight but dealing with social situations involving food is something we have to learn for long-term success.
 
Looking4Change said:
Don’t be so harsh on yourself......
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I ended up drinking 2 glasses of champagne last night and eating half of a sandwich that was quite filling. Today I didn’t eat much, 2 tangerines and some white hominey with shredded cheddar cheese sprinkled on it.

I’m baking chicken breasts in green chili sauce (verde) for dinner with rice.

Drinking only water all day.

I don’t feel hungry.

I’m trying not to eat when stressed, or for fun.

And as far as going out... I socialize with my kids (all adults) and my parents, and with my online friends and rarely anyone else. I date a guy who lives 3 hours away but we only see each other about 7-8 times a year. On weekends. I just really prefer to come home and relax. I hide away from the world and all it’s demands. I am a single mom who had to be responsible for three daughters, my house was always the go-to house for my kids and all of their friends. I lived a very social (albeit forced upon me) social life. I was that mom who took the kids out to movies every Thursday, and their friends... camping, etc.
Now they are older (all living with me as of today - The youngest moved back home) and I and my three adult daughters share a home. It’s constantly filled with their friends and so I’m not exactly alone but I do tend to close myself up in my bedroom and try to get alone time as much as possible. Trust me... I’m an INFP Personality type. I soooooo need it.
 
A photo of me (in my kitchen after checking on dinner)... Tonight. I look in the mirror and see a very out of shape person, and I do a selfie and think I don’t look half bad for my age. I know I will look better once I lose weight... I want to look better at age 50 than I did at age 25. I have 8 months until my 50th birthday. I feel like being here with all of you makes me feel more self aware and accountable for myself. My BMI says I’m obese so it’s really time for me to be serious with my eating habits.

I stopped wearing makeup 5 years ago and stopped bleaching my hair and doing fake nails... that was VERY hard to do. But if I can do that, I can do this!
 

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Evening All, pretty average week, nothing major to report it’s Wednesday evening in the U.K. so far I’ve lifted weights today and played football Monday. Trying to be more regular with working out.

Been having some mad cravings for bad food today, however instead of ordering a pizza I went shopping and made a jacket potato with feta cheese. Was actually in my limit for the day, so think I’m at least making sensible choices when I do want to be bad! :)

Hope everyone else is doing well
 
Went for a drink last Friday. I know from a weight loss perspective completely woeful. First one in around 38 days. I should feel worse but I actually felt good the day after. This journey for me was not only a opportunity to get fit and healthy physically, but also to resolve my mental state as well. Alcohol has always been a escape for me when things get too much and for the first time in years I woke up the day after a few beers and my first thought was not to want to go for another one. My Mindset is different now, think I’ve built a healthier relationship with alcohol.
 
Going for "a" drink isn´t a problem. Going for a few once a month isn´t, either. Having 10 pints every Friday would definitely make things harder. Good to hear you feel like you´re more in control!
 
Yeah agreed. Just weight in hovering around the 15:11 mark, so defo halted progress this week. Will try going another month, quite like the challenge of how long I can go, stupid I know
 
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