"Homophobic" - fearing homosexuals? some how that's the reason men always equate "gay" with "two guys"?? (by the way, i'm sure there are tons of women who make the same assumption)
The most likely reason people make that correlation is because "gay" is typically used to describe a male homosexual, while the word "lesbian" describes a female homosexual. If it's really so offensive, try using "homosexual" or "gay/lesbian" when you're making this referrence, or make up a word like "gaybian" - that'd be awesome.
How about Lesbiflamer?