Weight-Loss No binge, no purge - one day at at time.

Weight-Loss
Thanks Petal, I think I'll do just that this afternoon. I don't need anything, really, but browsing while relaxed usually leads to better results than doing so under the stress of needing something specific anyway.
This morning I took my own (diary) advice and went for a walk in the woods. Not quite 3 hours of fast walking in relatively hard terrain. I'd already had a 30 minute morning walk so now I'm not just feeling good in and about myself but I also have calories to waste. Think I'll have lunch at McDonalds :p Or maybe I'll go home, change, and eat something a little excessive in a proper restaurant. No binging, no large desserts, just a decadent lunch. Hm...
 
Weeeeell... I'm back. Ended up at McD's. Fries good, McChicken disappointing. Funny that, it's the only one of their burgers I actually liked. Wonder if it's my mood, my changing tastes, or just a fluke of their preparation. Anyway, it wasn't satisfying. I then went across the street and bought one chocolate for dessert. Which was very nice but made my sweet cravings stronger. Went to retrieve the bag I forgot after my course yesterday, then went to pick up the sandals I'd brought to the cobbler a while back. (Because doing useful things often helps with cravings.) Aaaaand he just kept talking (I don't like smalltalk with strangers!) and when he found out what I do for a living he of course decided he's in pain and really needs therapy. Off the record, of course. Just wouldn't take no for an answer, too :banghead: So... now I need a new cobbler. And I was so frustrated at not just being able to lose the politeness when necessary! I mean: I can with guys who are clearly pushing for sex but everything in my upbringing screams at me when I try to be assertive with little oldish blue collar workers. Aaanyway... I was frustrated about not being able to convince him and was *so* tempted to go into the grocery store next door and grab a large bar of chocolate. Will have a bath instead and fume silently. Or not so silently, actually, I'm text-complaining at friends. From now on when men ask me what work I do I'll either say pathologist or gynecologist.
 
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I think I made it! Cooked a dinner that was much more satisfying than that silly burger, had grapes for dessert, and went to the grocery store with a full stomach so I wouldn´t buy dangerous stuff. I did get a 4-pack of Mon Cheri chocolates, mainly to practice having sweets in the house without eating them all in one go. Not having any today.
I also realized the main reason I was so angry earlier was that on leaving the workshop I was actually trying to figure out a way to help Cobbler Dude. Because apparently I still haven´t learned that while ignoring one direct "no" is just rude, ignoring 5 in a row is "red alert, abort mission, do not spend time alone with this person ever" territory. It doesn´t matter if someone means well (maybe he did!): if they don´t respect my clearly stated boundaries it´s not healthy for me to be around them.
 
Oh Lama you did have a busy day but well done on not eating loads of chocolate and keeping occupied. Shame about the burger . I did see your message earlier saying you would go to mc d and I was dreaming of a chicken burger . But I think your right your tastes have changed I bet.
Anyway well done you on a very successful day and sorry about the cobbler . What a nuisance.
Me I had no cravings today . Ate pretty well and kept to plan .
 
Maybe there's a even trade of services to be made? A quid pro quo if you will but on the level.

I didn't binge today and I kind of want to let it go. It's certainly a huge problem, my no 1, but I have felt I've given it too much power by focusing on its occurrence daily. Same time, I've really benefitted from checking in with others and no binge runs. Hope my presence has helped others too. I am very susceptible now though too, now that I'm at a healthier weight and transitioning to the long-term. I'm conflicted. I will be here as needed I think. Thanks, Rob, for your support.
 
I did fine today, no bingeing. I had temptations but managed to keep them at bay. What I worry about is I know myself and my history, I've ended all of my past diets, successful or not with a binge. And that binge usually came out of nowhere, I know it can happen again quite easily. Hopefully I will write not bite when its coming.

LaMa, a bath sounds like a really good alternative to the chocolate bar, I hope it worked out. Sorry about the Cobbler Guy, sounds like you handled it as well as you could have. And I appreciate all of your writings, this is a great place to write not bite as much as you like.

Petal, good to hear that you had a good day and no cravings, that's great.

Rob, you are always a help, and while I would like for you to never binge again, if you do I think hearing about it helps. Keep on posting, and thanks for your support as well!

Hope Vic and Misty are ok.
 
Petal001 said:
Me I had no cravings today . Ate pretty well and kept to plan .
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Wonderful, long may it continue!
bensanon said:
I'm conflicted. I will be here as needed I think.
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Sounds sensible. You don't have to post here every day to earn the right to write when you do need to.

alligatorob said:
I did fine today, no bingeing. I had temptations but managed to keep them at bay. What I worry about is I know myself and my history, I've ended all of my past diets, successful or not with a binge. And that binge usually came out of nowhere, I know it can happen again quite easily. Hopefully I will write not bite when its coming.
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I haven't been binge free for as long as you have but so far it seems that if I keep an eye on my moods I can catch myself and deal with the feelings instead of having them burn away underground until they suddenly erupt in a giant binge. From your writings here you don't sound like a typical emotional eater though, just someone who maybe enjoyed large portions. Did you only binge on/after diets or at normal times as well? Understanding the mechanism/pattern behind your binging might help you gain more long-term control.

I don't feel in much danger today. Got my meals planned and/or prepped and if I want something sweet after dinner I can have grapes or a Mon Cheri chocolate.
 
We all think of binging in different ways. For me all my binging was done alone and in secret. And it was always unhealthy food and mainly driven by emotions. It's always there ticking in the background but not as forceful as before.

LaMa there are some delicious grapes available right now. I have mine all portioned up for the week. Rob glad you had no cravings . And the other Rob sounds like you are doing great. Look forward to reading your posts. This thread has been great , you realise you are not alone .
 
Well I did binge on bread yesterday. I just was going back for more and more. It was 35 cal each so I didn’t do much damage!!! Other than that I had a good day!!! I did not purge. Not even thinking about it...

Today I should do better than yesterday!!!
 
Petal001 said:
We all think of binging in different ways. For me all my binging was done alone and in secret. And it was always unhealthy food and mainly driven by emotions. It's always there ticking in the background but not as forceful as before.
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Sounds like me. I agree that this thread is great. It´s just good to have a place where I don´t feel like I´m boring everyone to death with my food obsessions.
vicincali2 said:
Well I did binge on bread yesterday. I just was going back for more and more. It was 35 cal each so I didn’t do much damage!!! Other than that I had a good day!!! I did not purge. Not even thinking about it...

Today I should do better than yesterday!!!
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Well done not binging! Definitely better to overeat on bread than on chocolate.
 
Glad to hear that Lama.
I a bit of upset going on at home this eve . Husband being a bad patient . I am holding firm and not binging on the healthy food stuff ( Cos lets face it I have very little bad food in house ) . Will eat some brown toast and beans maybe . I will report back in a while to see if I hold firm .
 
You CAN hold firm, Petal! Do nice things for yourself, nicer than stuffing yourself with food you don´t need. Maybe some relaxation exercises? Online shopping? A walk? Warm bath?
 
Thanks Lama . I just had the beans and wholemeal roll toasted . I have actually eaten excellent today so won’t spoil it. I am going to wash my hair and bath and by time I do all that and move laundry about etc it will be time for bed .
this thread is a godsend x
 
No binge today for me, I had cravings but not too bad.

Vic, good for you not purging yesterday! Hope you had a no b/p day today.

LaMa and Petal you make some interesting points. As I have said before the reason I believe that I binge is instinctive, I think I have a genetic inbred drive to eat as much as I can. We all evolved in a time when food was very short, overweight impossible, and starvation common. I just believe I have the genes to binge. What I need to do now is figure out how to live with them in today's very artificial environment. I do have emotional problems that come from bingeing. Like you Petal I have done a lot of my bingeing in hiding, and after doing it I was embarrassed and ashamed. LaMa, I am sure some of my binges were triggered by other stresses, but I think much of my stress has come from bingeing and overeating. I did binge and binge often, almost every day. My peak weight was 360 lbs about 10 years ago, 200 lbs higher than it should have been, you don't get that fat without eating lots and lots, I think regular bingeing is required. My theories about why I binged are of course pure conjecture, I am not expert on this, except via practical experience. And I agree with Petal, all of us have different bingeing stories and experience, but in the end it is a very similar problem.

Anyway thanks for listening, those of you who did, I agree it is good to have a place to talk about these issues and know others have shared experiences. And no judgement here.

Lets no b/p tomorrow!
 
alligatorob said:
I think I have a genetic inbred drive to eat as much as I can. We all evolved in a time when food was very short, overweight impossible, and starvation common. I just believe I have the genes to binge.
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That's true for all of us, at least to a certain degree, and it may be somewhat more the case for you. However for most conditions (obesity being one of them) genes are just a modifier, not a 0-1 determiner (hope that makes sense in English). And in many circumstances the single best predictor for lasting future change is the subjective feeling of having control.
I sincerely hope that the longer you stick with your plans the more you start to genuinely feel you do have control over your food intake (having moved toward less processed stuff should help there) but in the meantime I hope you can remind yourself, every time thoughts about your genetic predisposition come up - out loud if possible - that 5 months are not a fluke and you can form habits that'll keep you happier and healthier long-term. Your brain tends to believe whatever you tell it often enough.

I also hope that wasn't too preachy and I didn't just scare you away from sharing your honest thoughts and feelings. It's just that it's therapy day today :p
 
“Anyway thanks for listening, those of you who did, I agree it is good to have a place to talk about these issues and know others have shared experiences. And no judgement here.”

Absolutely Rob thanks for listening to us too . It’s great to put your thoughts down and not be judged.

Lama I agree that 5 months of new habits forming will help control those urges and I think Rob and I are on the same timeline for really getting focused and tackling our weight , the urge to binge is less but I think more so for me anyway I don’t want to ruin what success I have had . I know now that if I do seriously binge it will actually make me feel unwell , and will upset my mentality which I’m keeping in check even through the stresses I have up and down . I love this thread .
 
Well yesterday, I did not b/p. I did pretty good. Had breakfast, lunch, dinner, and even a snack of a macaroon! I even lost weight!
 
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