I want to be skinny!

[Super Slim]

Hi There,

I am new here. Here are my stats:
- female
- 44 yrs old
- height 6 ft
- weight 145
- From June/09 - present lost 85 lbs

I LOVE being skinny. I am now nice and slim at 145 lbs. However, I want to lose about 10 more pounds, I then would weigh 135 lbs. That would put my BMI just into the underweight category, at 18.3.

If I eat healthy, exercise, take all of my vitamins, drink water like a fish and do everything to remain healthy... is being just slightly underweight ok?

I look forward to your replies.

Super Slim.

 

[mizzie]

Ok, just stop right there. Your BMI right now is 19.7, which is just barely in the healthy range as it is. You are skinny, you are fine. Why on earth would you want to lose more weight and be underweight? So you can look like a stick? Isn't being healthy more importent? No, being underweight is not ok.

 

[Super Slim]

Thanks for your reply Mizzie

Hi Mizzie,

Ok logically I get that. But I have to wonder why I can't be at 18.5 the lowest range for my height?

Why does everyone fuss now that I am under a 20 BMI? Why is the lowest range not 20 then?

Is there any reason I can't lose the additional 10 lbs and be as skinny as I want to be?

I feel so much more feminine when I am skinny. I am 6 feet tall. I don't want to be unhealthy or anorexic ( I love food to much for that), but I don't see why being at a BMI of 18.5 would be any less healthy than a BMI of 19.7...

I look forward to your thoughts.

 

[mizzie]

Well, I'm not a doctor, so I don't know exactly what a healthy BMI for you would be and I don't know what difference 10 pounds would make. Yes, there are healthy people who are technically underweight or overweight according to BMI. But BMI guidelines are a generalization and work for most people.

None of us are doctors, but what you are suggesting could be potentially dangerous so I doubt you'll get a lot of support here. I would suggest talking to a doctor about it, if you are serious about losing more weight. They would be able to examine you and give you a better idea about how healthy it would be for you. I'd recommend one that specializes in weight issues. General practitioners don't always have a lot of knowledge in that area.

 

[Super Slim]

Ok Thank you!

Hello Again,

Ok I understand. I don't know what I expected... just someone that could relate I guess. A doctor won't be able to relate, especially one here, as I am not back in Canada...

I will figure it out. I will do some more research...

Thanks for your time.

 

[shawnnam]

Hello Again,

Ok I understand. I don't know what I expected... just someone that could relate I guess. A doctor won't be able to relate, especially one here, as I am not back in Canada...

I will figure it out. I will do some more research...

Thanks for your time.

You have a distorted body image or something going on that is not right. When I had been diagnosed with sever depression I wanted to be skinnier than a victoria secret model, in fact, I thought being their size I would still look fat. It isn't true, you're not seeing clearly. When someone hits a certain point in being underweight their body cannot do what it needs to do, in fact you can start growing a lot of body hair because your body cannot keep itself warm, underweight people can get a lot of acne, and women who are underweight can stop getting their periods and become infertile because they are messing with the hormonal balances in their bodies...

Do you really want to be a hairy, infertile woman just to be "skinny"? If you know the dangers of it and still want it then you need to speak to a therapist right away because you have a distorted image.

 

[Super Slim]

Hi Shawnnam

Thank you so much for your response.

I know I can never be or as slim as those beautiful models, beside I am way older than them anyway. All I want is to get to the very lowest 'healthy' BMI. Which would put me at a BMI of 18.5 (no lower) and a weight of 135 lbs on my 6ft frame.

Why is wanting to be a the lowest end of normal not ok? I honestly don't understand. I eat healthy, I take all my vitamins, I drink water like a fish and I walk about 4 miles a day... am I healthy now? YES... why would I not be healthy with 10 more lbs off?

As you can imagine I expected to get this kind of response, and I am ok with that. But I honestly don't see why it is a problem.

I don't want to go into the underweight category... I should not get hair on my body, my hair on my head is healthy, I don't have acne at all, I am past the age where I want children, and I had a partial hysterectomy so that I won't have a period anymore (back in my early 30's... I am 44 now...)

You asked me: Do you really want to be a hairy, infertile woman just to be "skinny"?

Well of course I do!! Don't we all!!

I am just kidding, no of course not, and that is not my intent. I just want to be a slim as is healthily possible and for some reason 'everyone' in my life is giving me flack about it.

I look forward to your reply.

 

[shawnnam]

Thank you so much for your response.

I know I can never be or as slim as those beautiful models, beside I am way older than them anyway. All I want is to get to the very lowest 'healthy' BMI. Which would put me at a BMI of 18.5 (no lower) and a weight of 135 lbs on my 6ft frame.

Why is wanting to be a the lowest end of normal not ok? I honestly don't understand. I eat healthy, I take all my vitamins, I drink water like a fish and I walk about 4 miles a day... am I healthy now? YES... why would I not be healthy with 10 more lbs off?

As you can imagine I expected to get this kind of response, and I am ok with that. But I honestly don't see why it is a problem.

I don't want to go into the underweight category... I should not get hair on my body, my hair on my head is healthy, I don't have acne at all, I am past the age where I want children, and I had a partial hysterectomy so that I won't have a period anymore (back in my early 30's... I am 44 now...)

You asked me: Do you really want to be a hairy, infertile woman just to be "skinny"?

Well of course I do!! Don't we all!!

I am just kidding, no of course not, and that is not my intent. I just want to be a slim as is healthily possible and for some reason 'everyone' in my life is giving me flack about it.

I look forward to your reply.

How about you just replace the fat you may have with muscle? I don't know if you even have much fat, but I don't imagine you have much. If you want a tight toned body then do some weight training and maybe invest in a personal trainer to get rid of fat and have more muscle. You can be the BMI you are right now and look like you are less if you sculpt muscles. I would suggest that over simply losing weight.

 

[Super Slim]

Weight Training...

Hi Shawnnam,

hmmm well that was my plan once I got to my lower weight. I don't want 'muscle', but I do want to really tone up. As you can imagine I need to after losing so much weight.

My legs are good because I walk so much, but I want to tone my tummy, butt and arms... up...

I will have to find ways to do it myself here, no personal trainers or gyms here and can't afford to buy the stuff myself... but that is another story and chapter of this journey...

You are correct though. If I don't get stuck on a number on the scale or BMI chart, and more go by how I look, then toning would be the way to go. I bet I would look a lot better with a toned body, than just a skinny one...

But as I type that I always come back to, why can't I have both... I need to do some soul searching I guess.

Thanks again for your time, it is greatly appreciated...

 

[Jelav102]

I would like to drop a lil comment although this dialogue was very interesting and full of good arguments.

I personally went to a BMI of 20 someday. At that point, I wanted to lose more weight because I still thought I was fat (here is the body image issue). The problem is that when you reach a healthy BMI, it is much more difficult to lose a pound. That is why I decided to stop there and just continue working out because I liked to and I felt good doing it.

If you decide to go for another 10 pounds off, you will have to starve yourself much more than you've done before and to do more and more exercise because you will be lighter. Healthy choices won't be enough to reach your goal because this goal will be less and less a healthy one. This could lead to health issues and discouragement. This is also a way to fall into EDs because sometimes when you want something so much, you can do anything to accomplish it. You have to remember that mental illness comes from hormonal changes and that anybody can be affected at anytime of his life. And EDs ARE mental diseases.

Just take care of yourself and try to do little changes like the one disscused in this post and work hard on your self-esteem. This is the hard part, but it's worth it. Beauty and confidence are in your attitude as much as in the way you look. I may sound moralist here, but I hope you can find a way to love yourself more. In fact, I'm on the same journey so it probably helps me either to write it down here.

PS I am so frenchie that I can't tell if this message sounds rude or anything. I just wanna say that I give this opinion in total friendship and respect with your choices. Feel free to answer back

Jen

 

[Kayshiz]

Ok logically I get that. But I have to wonder why I can't be at 18.5 the lowest range for my height?

Why does everyone fuss now that I am under a 20 BMI? Why is the lowest range not 20 then?

Is there any reason I can't lose the additional 10 lbs and be as skinny as I want to be?

Hold it right there Slim. Your logic is full of holes.

Lets say there are 2 girls, both the same height (5'8"), both the same BMI (lets say 19), which puts them at about 125 pounds.

Girl number 1 is a 38DD.

Girl number 2 is a 32A.

Girl number 1 would probably be much skinnier then girl 2...

Hmm, these girls couldn't have anywhere close to the same body, and I only compared one part of them.

From Wiki:

The Body Mass Index (BMI), or Quetelet index, is a statistical measure which compares a person's weight and height. Though it does not actually measure the percentage of body fat, it is used to estimate a healthy body weight based on a person's height. Due to its ease of measurement and calculation, it is the most widely used diagnostic tool to identify weight problems within a population, usually whether individuals are underweight, overweight or obese.

Its just a tool, not the end all be all last say on the subject.

We don't know what you look like, so yea, going under a BMI of 19 is probably not the best idea. Since BMI is used to guesstimate the health of a population, and doctors you know...went to school for it...I'd go by what your Dr said.

 

[Super Slim]

Hey Jelav102

Hey Jelav,

Thank you so much for your response... What if I don't have to starve myself or do more exercise to get there. What if I just keep doing what I am doing and I continue to lose down to 135 lbs, then are you saying 'that' would be ok? But it is not ok if I have to struggle to get there?

I definitely don't want health issues or Eating Disorders, if I do this in a healthy way, which I have learned how to do on this one year journey, then neither should be a problem or possibility right? Or am I missing something here? The last thing I need in my life right now is a mental illness

As to my confidence, I feel fantastic, I love how I look, I love my new clothes, my new found peace with myself. AND I want to lose more... I would think that my feelings about my beauty and health will not change, they will only be enhanced...

I admit I am my own worst critic, and I could love myself and celebrate my successes more than I do. I will take this to heart and take a closer look at it ok?

You did not come across rude at all, I respect your opinion and appreciate you taking the time to express it. Thank you so much!

 

[Super Slim]

Hello there Kayshiz

Hi Kayshiz,

Thank so much for your response

I am more like girl number 2 with the smaller chest and breasts. Why would girl number 1 be the skinny one?? I am confused... I think I missed something there in your example...

I understand that BMI is only a tool. I use it along with many other tools to determine where I want to end up:
- BMI Charts
- Weight Charts and bathroom scale
- Clothes sizes
- Measuring Tape
- Before & After Photos
- Stats I collected from over 50 women who are my similar height, real every day woman, on another forum
- Stats I collected from Models and Actresses
- I do not look at measuring up to a Victoria Secret model as I am sure all of them are underweight and very young
- etc...

I am already well below what my doctor said. He said 162. I am 145, and there is no well in hell I am going to gain my weight back, just to get to his level.

 

[Jelav102]

Hi Super Slim,

To conclude my point, I would say that I think that if by eating healthy and doing a REASONNABLE and healthy amount of exercise you achieve a lower weight, this weight is meant to be off. The body is a fabulous machine that knows what's best for itself. That way, if your healthy lifestyle brings you to a BMI of 18 or 19, it is healthy for you, though I don't think that is possible.

Like I said, when you want something very much, you can do a lot of bad things to achieve it. I personnaly overtrained sometime in my life to achieve a goal, before realizing this was a mess and this was not the right way of doing it. Listen to your body, it knows best.

Good luck in your journey

Jen

 

[Super Slim]

Thanks Jen

Thanks Jen,

I will listen very carefully to my body as I go along and see where I naturally settle out.

I appreciated all of your feedback.

 

[antyoch]

Personally all I can see is you arguing and justifying.

In your first post you asked for an opinion. Do we think it's healthy from the information given. No I don't think it's healthy. But I also don't know your body and what you eat. Are you getting enough nutrition, protein, good fats. Enough vitamins from natural sources.

The fact of the matter is, you're clearly just trolling. You ask an opinion then when someone gives you it, you argue that they're wrong. Clearly you think you know everything and already have your mind set on it. So why should we bother?

 

[Kayshiz]

Some of the things you are saying do make you sound like you will never be happy with how you look. Not an eating disorder, but definately somethng could be going on that is affecting how you perceive yourself.

I LOVE being skinny. I am now nice and slim at 145 lbs. However, I want to lose about 10 more pounds, I then would weigh 135 lbs. That would put my BMI just into the underweight category, at 18.3.
If I eat healthy, exercise, take all of my vitamins, drink water like a fish and do everything to remain healthy... is being just slightly underweight ok?

The key word here is underweight. Underweight means just that. It is not ok.

Is there any reason I can't lose the additional 10 lbs and be as skinny as I want to be?
I feel so much more feminine when I am skinny. I am 6 feet tall. I don't want to be unhealthy or anorexic ... I don't see why being at a BMI of 18.5 would be any less healthy than a BMI of 19.7

There are several reasons why you shouldn't be as "skinny as you want to be". And yes, a person with a BMI 1.2 off from some one else can easily be less or more healthy. They are different weights.

All I want is to get to the very lowest 'healthy' BMI.

You are not trying for a wasit or dress size here. Just being at the lowest BMI becasue you can does make you seem like you are obsessing over your weight and possibly reaching for something very unhealthy.

I just want to be a slim as is healthily possible and for some reason 'everyone' in my life is giving me flack about it.

You are putting slim before healthy in every sentence. As in "I want to be slim AND healthy" insead of "I want to be healthy AND slim". There is a difference there.

You are correct though. If I don't get stuck on a number on the scale or BMI chart, and more go by how I look, then toning would be the way to go. I bet I would look a lot better with a toned body, than just a skinny one...
But as I type that I always come back to, why can't I have both...

Why do you always come back to that? Do you really think people that have any muscle mass will never look skinny?

I definitely don't want health issues or Eating Disorders, if I do this in a healthy way, which I have learned how to do on this one year journey, then neither should be a problem or possibility right?

OF COURSE it could be a possibility. ED's are not the only mental health issues linked to weight.

I understand that BMI is only a tool. I use it along with many other tools to determine where I want to end up:
- BMI Charts
- Weight Charts and bathroom scale
- Clothes sizes
- Measuring Tape
- Before & After Photos
- Stats I collected from over 50 women who are my similar height, real every day woman, on another forum
- Stats I collected from Models and Actresses
- I do not look at measuring up to a Victoria Secret model as I am sure all of them are underweight and very young
- etc...

Again, this sounds like obsessing.

I am more like girl number 2 with the smaller chest and breasts. Why would girl number 1 be the skinny one?? I am confused... I think I missed something there in your example...

If girl number 1 has 10 pounds of fat around her chest, it's not on her stomach, thighs, ass...etc. Thus, skinnier.

Besides all that, you are missing the big picture here. If you though being slightly underweight was ok, (really ok) you wouldn't have posed the question in the first place. With questions like this, as soon as the OP gets a halfway valid response that matches what they want to hear, they ignore everyone elses suggestions.

Ok I understand. I don't know what I expected... just someone that could relate I guess.

You said it yourself.

 

[Super Slim]

Thank You Kayshiz

Thank You Kayshiz,

You took a lot of time to comment on each sentence in my comments. I really appreciate it.

And I think perhaps you are right. I started this journey for the 'look', not for my 'health'. Health only came into play as I got thinner.

I think you are correct in pointing out what you have. I think I will never be happy, until I look at what is going on inside of me. I think it is time to stop focusing on weight loss. I am thin enough and it is obviously no longer about that.

I think I wrote this thread in a safe place where no one new me, hoping someone could relate. But deep down, knowing no one could or should. I think I was reaching out for help. And I got it... thank you.

I will sit down and re-read all of this, and get some help. This is the first time in my life that I feel I can keep this weight off. And I don't want to mess this up.

I am clearly struggling with some emotional issues and it is time to address them. I am embarrassed, but also relieved. Again, I want to thank you for taking the time.

My real work is just beginning...

All the best on your journey. And thanks to everyone who commented. I cannot thank you enough. I will stop here, I will learn to appreciate how far I have come and celebrate my success, and stop obsessing about being in control and getting to a magic number on the scale.

For the person that called me a 'troll'. Sometimes we know what we need to do, but just don't quite realize it yet. Sometimes we need assistance and don't know how to ask for it. Sometimes we need a kick in the pants and I guess I got that from you... I am not a troll, whatever that means, and you can... oh never mind you are not worth my time either...

Thanks everyone,

Super Slim and learning to love it!

 

[Stefani1]

For the person that called me a 'troll'. Sometimes we know what we need to do, but just don't quite realize it yet. Sometimes we need assistance and don't know how to ask for it. Sometimes we need a kick in the pants and I guess I got that from you... I am not a troll, whatever that means, and you can... oh never mind you are not worth my time either...

I'm sorry, I couldn't help but comment when I read this because I don't want you to feel hurt by what you believe that other person said to you about "trolling."

Trolling just means that you're "looking" for something, not that you're a troll. Sorry if I'm interrupting your conversation here, but I really wanted to clear up that misinterpretation so that you wouldn't feel hurt!

I hope that you won't be offended by my interruption. I hope it makes you feel better!

I'm struggling with the same sort of issues, although right now I am trying to get to where you are currently. I bet you look amazing! How did you manage to lose so much weight again? You probably previously posted it, but would you mind re-posting the details of your weight loss journey?

I would really appreciate it, as I am trying to lose weight myself! You seem like a really great person and I hope that you can realize that you're beautiful and fit and wonderful. I know it's hard to see it in the mirror, I still don't see it myself, but I really hope that you will be able to in the future.

 

[Super Slim]

Oh Stefani

Hi Stefani,

You actually brought tears to my eyes. And I don't allow that to happen very often.

Thank you so much for taking the time. Although some of the posts hurt or upset me, they are correct to some degree.

I really need to stop the madness and if I want to 'look' thinner, I need to focus my efforts on that and not the bathroom scale.

I could not sleep tonight, I am up thinking about what they said. I just found this incredible website:



OMG I think I get it. I am devouring this site and looking for more info regarding Body Fat Composition.

Thank you again honey, you have made my day.

All the best in your weight loss journey. I am learning so much! I did the online program Shrink Yourself, if you have never heard of it, find it online and do it, or order the book and read it. It has been an invaluable tool in my journey.

Big hugs to you for getting inside my heart and not just inside my head.