Hi I am new here and I need your help ASAP.

moonlightCRESENT

moonlightCRESENT

New member
hey everyone , this is y first post and I joined this community because I need help urgently ( I know it is long but please i hope you could read it all )
Anyways ever Since I was a kid I was so skinny that back when I was around 12 years old I have been used as the science class skeleton.. Suddenly and while growing up I started gaining weight and around 14 years old even though I was at a normal weight I looked chubby.
At that time my mother decided to make me follow a strict lifestyle of cutting off everything except salads and non fatty meats at the age of 14 . I couldn't complain since I liked those and wasn't into sweets nor fast food , that was basically what I used to eat already so I couldn't complain . Also I went to swim for hours every single day of summer . A few months later my mom hadn't seen any change and thus decided to cut off dinner , bread and milk which I did for 4 years till I was 19 .
I look a bit bigger than others because of the " swimming shoulders " as swimming can make your shoulders broader. She still wasn't happy with the results so she decided that I should be eating one meal per day at 12 am and that's it . Now I am 22 and I have been following this ever since . And if I was invited somewhere to dinner or something I would starve myself starting the day before .
Recently my relatives who lived abroad came to visit , also one of my cousins lost a lot of weight , so the comaprision started . My aunts telling me that I am fat and that I should lower my calorie intake . I never calculated calories but recently I am doing so and I am eating around 600 per day .
But it didn't end here , they used me as a comparision tool , if smeone ganed weight " you will become like HER (me) " or "why do you weight more than her if she is fatter than you , you should be ashamed ".

I stopped swimming last year as I got tired of it and as I started to feel ashamed to wear a swimsuit... But I don't have a car and still go almost everywhere on foot
I weight 62 KG and I am 1.65m tall .
I went to a doctor who tld me there was nothing wrong with me and I did cholesterol and sugar levels blood test and they were below the normal range.
I am living now in the dorms of my university and I skipped every single gathering because I don't want to explain to people why I don't eat.my roomate eats whatever she want and she is sticks and bones while I pretend to be asleep and tell her " I'll eat later " and hope she forgets about it .

But my mom ( who still controls my life at the age of 22) , wasn't satisfied and took an appointement on my behalf at a plastic surgeon's clinic wihtout my consent .
I went today for a consultation as I have nothing to lose and she is paying for it.
And now I have an appointement in 2 days to have Liposuction surgery which I don't want to do because I see nothing wrong with myself.
I have been starving myself for 2 days now without eating anything and just drinking water to shut up my relatives who think I eat while they do .
I talked to my mom about it and she was angry as to how careless I am and that other people 's opinion matter and I went home while she went to the bank to pull money to pay for the surgery that I don't want.
I lied most of my life feeling dizzy , lightheaded , sick and nauseaus and I am tired of this .
 
I think it is time to start standing up for yourself is there a counsellor you can speak to at UNI ? health and well being is more important than being stick thin. As a swimmer I suspect you have good levels of muscle in the upper body, What is your current bodyfat % as this is a better indicator than BMI especially for any kind of athlete.
 
I personally don't know my body fat % since I never swam competetively , I just went to the pool / beach and swam until I fet like my body can't float anymore
hmm personally , i think I look stronger on my upper body and have stick thin legs , fat tends to accumulate on my belly and chin ( causing a slight double chin ) which is the reason my mom suggested the lipsuction
 
Hi
Sorry to hear you’ve had such a hard time I agree I think it’s time you start standing up for yourself. The diet you are following of starving yourself or eating very little is just not healthy and will end with worse outcomes. Take it step by step eat clean and exercise regularly. It will take time but you will get there just keep going. I know it sounds harsh but you have to tell your mum to back off. If you would like any tips on nutrition or exercise then drop me a message I will be happy to help.
 
bi Paul
I personally would try and avoid weightloss products as most of the time you don’t get the results they claim you will get. I would reduce carbs and any added sugars up your water and protein intake and do compound exercises squat,deadlift and bench press
 
Danevolvefitness said:
Hi
Sorry to hear you’ve had such a hard time I agree I think it’s time you start standing up for yourself. The diet you are following of starving yourself or eating very little is just not healthy and will end with worse outcomes. Take it step by step eat clean and exercise regularly. It will take time but you will get there just keep going. I know it sounds harsh but you have to tell your mum to back off. If you would like any tips on nutrition or exercise then drop me a message I will be happy to help.
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Thank you , I would love to get tips , because it is only getting worse, 2 days ago we were invited to lunch and she took my plate , portioned it the way she want and threw it in front of me saying " that's enough for the people like you " ...
my stick and bones skinny cousin asked me : " will you really feel satisfied with this ?"
I don't really have a choice , she keeps teling me I have the genes to be fat so she keeps cutting stuff off ...
While I never even know how each pproduct reacts to my body , and she has been obsessed with diet shows recently , makes me watch them so I could learn ...
 
Danevolvefitness said:
Hi
Sorry to hear you’ve had such a hard time I agree I think it’s time you start standing up for yourself. The diet you are following of starving yourself or eating very little is just not healthy and will end with worse outcomes. Take it step by step eat clean and exercise regularly. It will take time but you will get there just keep going. I know it sounds harsh but you have to tell your mum to back off. If you would like any tips on nutrition or exercise then drop me a message I will be happy to help.
Click to expand...

Also at that unch she was bragging : " That is the only meal she'll eat today I want her to be the way I was when I was her age " Also I had an anorexic friend and while my friend was in rehab my mom kept praising her , that she doesn't think anorexia is a real condition and that is what everyone should aspire to be
 
Hi
Firstly I would look up anorexia online and show your mum the health effects of this as this is definitely not the path you want to take.
With a balanced diet 3 meals a day you can still lose weight but in a much healthier way. I would suggest getting your nutrition under control first take control it’s your health your mum is messing with. Then I would suggest talking to someone at your local gym about exercises to help with healthy weight loss this doesn’t mean you will turn in to arnie so don’t panick but adding some sort of weight lifting will definitely boost your weight lips and make you feel a lot better in your self
 
Danevolvefitness said:
Hi
Firstly I would look up anorexia online and show your mum the health effects of this as this is definitely not the path you want to take.
With a balanced diet 3 meals a day you can still lose weight but in a much healthier way. I would suggest getting your nutrition under control first take control it’s your health your mum is messing with. Then I would suggest talking to someone at your local gym about exercises to help with healthy weight loss this doesn’t mean you will turn in to arnie so don’t panick but adding some sort of weight lifting will definitely boost your weight lips and make you feel a lot better in your self
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I ran tests for cholesterol , blood sugar level and vitamins recently just as a checkup , all was normal ... except HDL cholesterol being a bit lower than it should be , also I got my metabolism checked with another test the next day , nothing's wrong with that so healthwise everything seems well ... I am more of the " outdoor exercise " and I am not a fan of exercising in a room or confined area , i was going to start walking more when the summer heat goes down , any suggestions of what can I do more?
 
Yeah I get that I prefer to train out doors in the fresh air my self and train most of my clients outdoors. As I said I would definitely focus on the nutrition side of things first just take little steps start with breakfast have something like poached eggs and asparagus.
Then when you are ready to get out and exercise more there are so many great workouts that just require body weight you can still do squats,lunges push ups and a great exercise to add is sprints really get the blood pumping.

one thing to right down to give you motivation to keep pushing and I want you to remember this

PRACTICE MAKES PERMANENT!

remind yourself of that everyday and you will get there
 
Danevolvefitness said:
Yeah I get that I prefer to train out doors in the fresh air my self and train most of my clients outdoors. As I said I would definitely focus on the nutrition side of things first just take little steps start with breakfast have something like poached eggs and asparagus.
Then when you are ready to get out and exercise more there are so many great workouts that just require body weight you can still do squats,lunges push ups and a great exercise to add is sprints really get the blood pumping.

one thing to right down to give you motivation to keep pushing and I want you to remember this

PRACTICE MAKES PERMANENT!

remind yourself of that everyday and you will get there
Click to expand...

Thank you , I think I will stick to that first , doesn't seem impossible to do
 
No problem at all it’s definitely not impossible just take it one step at a time if you need any more advice or have any questions just let me know
 
Danevolvefitness said:
No problem at all it’s definitely not impossible just take it one step at a time if you need any more advice or have any questions just let me know
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Thank you again for your help ! Also I have a question , do the people who find it hard to gain weight also find it hard to lose it or is it just a myth ? ( I've been weighting between 59 kg and 62 kg for like 7 years )
 
Good question I personally believe it doesn’t make a difference what it comes down to is the individuals body and needs. For you I would say it comes from how your nutrition has been for a long time. 65kg would be your ideal body weight for how tall you are. And remember there is a difference from losing weight to losing body fat
 
Danevolvefitness said:
Good question I personally believe it doesn’t make a difference what it comes down to is the individuals body and needs. For you I would say it comes from how your nutrition has been for a long time. 65kg would be your ideal body weight for how tall you are. And remember there is a difference from losing weight to losing body fat
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true , because muscle weight more than fat but a fit person would look thinregardless of the number on the scale right ? and do you advise me to seek a nutritionist ? Could be water rather than fat ? ( how do I tell the difference in the first place?)

Also for reference I was looking for online clothes yesteray and I found this jeans model with a body type very close to mine : https://www.dhgate.com/product/wholesale-2015-new-arrivals-large-size-women/385998916.html
( my legs are a tiny bit skinnier and that's about the only difference)
 
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Take pro bodybuilders for example they would be classed as obese by most doctors but obviously they are in great shape with low body fat. I would suggest increasing the amount of water you drink and and
 
Manage your salt intake, get a good amount of sleep and if you really wanted to take electrolytes you can pick them up in health food shops or online
 
Danevolvefitness said:
Manage your salt intake, get a good amount of sleep and if you really wanted to take electrolytes you can pick them up in health food shops or online
Click to expand...

Btw I have a problem with my water intake ... If I am not thirsty I might just not drink until I walk in to the kitchen and remember it , does it affect the body too much ( sorry if I am being annoying with too much questions ....
 
Try keeping a bottle of water with you wherever you go and as soon as it’s empty refill it as drinking waterHelps Maintain the Balance of Body Fluids. Your body is composed of about 60% water. The functions of these bodily fluids include digestion, absorption, circulation, creation of saliva, transportation of nutrients, and maintenance of body temperature.
 
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