Wisdom from Larry the Cable Guy

My Dad got this list from work and it sure made me smile, hope it does same for you guys
  • A day with out sunshine is like night
  • on the other hand, you have different fingers
  • 42.7 percent of all statistics are made up on the spot
  • 99 percent of lawyers give the rest a bad name
  • remember half the people you know are below average
  • he who laughs last, thinks the slowest
  • depression is merely anger without enthusiasm
  • the early bird may get the worm, but the second mouse gets the cheese in the trap
  • support bacteria. they're the only culture some people have
  • a clear concscience is usually the sign of a bad memory
  • change is inevitable except from vending machines
  • if you think nobody cares, try missing a couple of payments
  • how many of you believe in psycho-kinesis? raise my hand
  • Ok, so whats the speed of dark?
  • When everything is coming your way, your in the wrong lane.
  • Hard work pays off in the future, laziness pays off now
  • how much deeper would the ocean be without sponges
  • eagles may soar, but weasels dont get sucked into jet engines
  • what happens if you get scared half to death, twice?
  • why do phsychics have to ask your name?
  • inside every older person is a younger person wondering, "what the heck happened"
  • Just remember- - if the world didnt suck, we would all fall off
  • light travels faster than sound. thats why some people appear bright until you hear them speak.
  • life isnt like a box of chocolates. Its more like a jar of jalapenos. What you do today, might burn your butt tommorow
 
LMAO! Good laugh for the day.
 
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