Vegasfatgirl11
New member
The first step is the hardest - or so they say. I've been planning this first step for far too long and its about time that I take action.
I'm Vegasfatgirl and I am morbidly obese. I have over 100 pounds to lose and am well aware that it's going to take time, patience, consistency, sweat, blood, tears, and set backs. I also am well aware of what changes I need to make in my life to be successful - its just implementing those changes that I (like I am sure everyone else does) struggle with.
My health in general is fair. I have an autoimmune disease that I've lived with for the last 10 years. It's managed with infusions and for the most part I don't have issues sans a flare here and there, which is usually caused by stress. I also have clinical depression which is not well-managed. I refuse to take drugs to feel "normal" when I honestly don't even know what normal is - I've lived with it my whole life and have found my own ways to cope. My blood pressure is normal as is my cholesterol and A1C (both high BP and diabetes run in the family). I, do however, plan to get a physical in the coming months. Thyroid problems run in the family too, but the last I had it checked it was fine. But I have some concerns with the amount of weight (50+lbs) I've put on in the past 2 years that maybe there is something "else" going on. I am having major surgery in just a few weeks that could potentially be life changing, but I will only know after its done.
I am divorced with no kids. Successful career woman who is married to her job, While I would like to meet a nice man, I know that I am a very undesirable specimen no matter what size I am. Because lets face it, you can fix fat, but you can't fix ugly (well not without a lot of money at least). And too, the dating pool in Vegas is pretty terrible too. Not that any of this matters to my WLJ, but just giving an idea of what my life is like.
I work 50-60 hours a week and am on call 24/7. My job is and can be very stressful and that wears on me from time to time, but I somehow always find a way to power thru. I sit at a desk 9-10 hours a day and don't get much movement in during the day. I keep telling myself to get up and move around, but it just doesn't happen. Something comes up that needs my attention. Same with taking a lunch break. I cannot tell you the last time I took a lunch break. I usually eat at my desk or skip entirely. I don't really have breakfast - sometimes its just a coffee with cream, others its a green smoothie or protein shake that I made - really depends on the day. If I do eat lunch then 9/10 times I will skip dinner and simply have a cocktail or several as my dinner...... which leads to where the weight gain comes from. Or at least that's what I attribute it to.
Like anyone who is divorced, my life changed pretty significantly. I quit my job, moved across country and started rebuilding my life. I also jumped into a liquor bottle - I never drank before my divorce, but in coping with all the changes I gravitated toward it. Throw in a high stress career and boom the weight just started piling on.
I have many poor habits that need to be adjusted. Skipping meals, drinking my meals, drive thru meals, little to no exercise, and lots of self hate.
I also tend to focus on where I used to be and all the things I used to do and I know living in the past is not healthy and only causes more self hate and disappointment, but it does fuel my desire for change. I've pretty much been fat my whole life - I had a stint in my mid 20s where I got down to my smallest, which was a size 2, but after moving to the East Coast with my (now) ex husband and being served an autoimmune diagnosis I wasn't able to maintain that size and blew back up to a size 10, but was still maintaining a very active life style (running, biking/cycling, hiking, lifting). I am currently a tight size 18..... but those size 2s are still in my "skinny" drawer - while I don't know how realistic the 2 is.... I am shooting for it.
I always have a game-plan, but its very much an all or nothing approach - which I know is why I haven't been very successful in my most recent efforts. I am trying to change too much at once and expect to lose huge amounts in a short time. Clearly this is not working - I am very overwhelmed with the amount of weight I need to lose and disappointed that I have that much to lose.
So as of right now, there is no true game plan. I want to focus on closing the rings on my activity tracker on my iwatch and stop ordering food out. I am not ready to fully give up my tequila, but I will cut back. Surgery in a couple weeks will give me 3+ weeks off from work, which I plan to focus on recovery and building new habits. The hope there is that I can stay away from work that long - its the only thing I have and truly the only thing that keeps me together. The suggested recovery time in 6 weeks. I originally only planned to take two, but after having a convo with the doc, he recommended that I put in for more to be on the safe side. As long as I can walk and get up and down stairs, then I will be just fine.
This WLD will be where all the dirty details are laid to rest and hopefully lead to a place of self motivation and success.
I'm Vegasfatgirl and I am morbidly obese. I have over 100 pounds to lose and am well aware that it's going to take time, patience, consistency, sweat, blood, tears, and set backs. I also am well aware of what changes I need to make in my life to be successful - its just implementing those changes that I (like I am sure everyone else does) struggle with.
My health in general is fair. I have an autoimmune disease that I've lived with for the last 10 years. It's managed with infusions and for the most part I don't have issues sans a flare here and there, which is usually caused by stress. I also have clinical depression which is not well-managed. I refuse to take drugs to feel "normal" when I honestly don't even know what normal is - I've lived with it my whole life and have found my own ways to cope. My blood pressure is normal as is my cholesterol and A1C (both high BP and diabetes run in the family). I, do however, plan to get a physical in the coming months. Thyroid problems run in the family too, but the last I had it checked it was fine. But I have some concerns with the amount of weight (50+lbs) I've put on in the past 2 years that maybe there is something "else" going on. I am having major surgery in just a few weeks that could potentially be life changing, but I will only know after its done.
I am divorced with no kids. Successful career woman who is married to her job, While I would like to meet a nice man, I know that I am a very undesirable specimen no matter what size I am. Because lets face it, you can fix fat, but you can't fix ugly (well not without a lot of money at least). And too, the dating pool in Vegas is pretty terrible too. Not that any of this matters to my WLJ, but just giving an idea of what my life is like.
I work 50-60 hours a week and am on call 24/7. My job is and can be very stressful and that wears on me from time to time, but I somehow always find a way to power thru. I sit at a desk 9-10 hours a day and don't get much movement in during the day. I keep telling myself to get up and move around, but it just doesn't happen. Something comes up that needs my attention. Same with taking a lunch break. I cannot tell you the last time I took a lunch break. I usually eat at my desk or skip entirely. I don't really have breakfast - sometimes its just a coffee with cream, others its a green smoothie or protein shake that I made - really depends on the day. If I do eat lunch then 9/10 times I will skip dinner and simply have a cocktail or several as my dinner...... which leads to where the weight gain comes from. Or at least that's what I attribute it to.
Like anyone who is divorced, my life changed pretty significantly. I quit my job, moved across country and started rebuilding my life. I also jumped into a liquor bottle - I never drank before my divorce, but in coping with all the changes I gravitated toward it. Throw in a high stress career and boom the weight just started piling on.
I have many poor habits that need to be adjusted. Skipping meals, drinking my meals, drive thru meals, little to no exercise, and lots of self hate.
I also tend to focus on where I used to be and all the things I used to do and I know living in the past is not healthy and only causes more self hate and disappointment, but it does fuel my desire for change. I've pretty much been fat my whole life - I had a stint in my mid 20s where I got down to my smallest, which was a size 2, but after moving to the East Coast with my (now) ex husband and being served an autoimmune diagnosis I wasn't able to maintain that size and blew back up to a size 10, but was still maintaining a very active life style (running, biking/cycling, hiking, lifting). I am currently a tight size 18..... but those size 2s are still in my "skinny" drawer - while I don't know how realistic the 2 is.... I am shooting for it.
I always have a game-plan, but its very much an all or nothing approach - which I know is why I haven't been very successful in my most recent efforts. I am trying to change too much at once and expect to lose huge amounts in a short time. Clearly this is not working - I am very overwhelmed with the amount of weight I need to lose and disappointed that I have that much to lose.
So as of right now, there is no true game plan. I want to focus on closing the rings on my activity tracker on my iwatch and stop ordering food out. I am not ready to fully give up my tequila, but I will cut back. Surgery in a couple weeks will give me 3+ weeks off from work, which I plan to focus on recovery and building new habits. The hope there is that I can stay away from work that long - its the only thing I have and truly the only thing that keeps me together. The suggested recovery time in 6 weeks. I originally only planned to take two, but after having a convo with the doc, he recommended that I put in for more to be on the safe side. As long as I can walk and get up and down stairs, then I will be just fine.
This WLD will be where all the dirty details are laid to rest and hopefully lead to a place of self motivation and success.
