So there's this girl... Long story, silly question

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pj1966

New member
So there's this girl... I moved to the town where I work in Dec. '06. The first time I went into the convenience store closest to work, the woman behind the counter caught my eye in a big way. That was when I started getting serious about losing weight. I was around 250 at the time and she's 120, tops. I am PAINFULLY shy when it comes to talking to women. I fought it and talked to her a few times. Small talk for almost a year. She has to know I like her. Ray Charles could see I have a big crush on her. One night last summer I went in the store around 10:00. Nobody else was in there so we got to talking a little. She asked me if I knew how long a drive it was to Superior. I told her "About 4 or 5 hours". She was going to take her son up there for the weekend for his birthday. It didn't even hit me until I was on my way home, near the end of our conversation, she mentioned she'd been up there before. AND, it's a convenience store, there's a rack of maps and atlas's on the other side of the counter :banghead: The weekend before Labor day last year I decided it was (finally) time to ask her out or just get her out of my mind and quit making myself crazy. I gave myself a week. The week before Labor day I went in before work, during lunch, after work, she's not there. I asked somebody where she was, she got another job :( In the meantime, I moved 15 miles away. I may never see her again. Early last week I went into the store before work like I always do and who do I see? My :Angel_anim: The next time I see her in there, I'm asking her out!!! I don't care if there's 50 people in line behind me. So my question is this - What would be a good response if she says "NO"? If that happens, people are going to see it. I'm going to want to cry and that would be bad. What do I say? I just want to prepare myself.
 
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Just be yourself. Shyness is understandable, and yeah, it'll be painful if she gives you a response you don't want. If she says no, my advice to you would simply be to smile politely and say..."Alright, just checking." Something along the lines of..."I just wanted to know if you and I could've been a possibility." Leave it along the lines of, we can't go forward romantically, but we can still be friends.

I know I'm not clarifying well, but you seem like a smart cookie. I'm pretty sure you know what I'm trying to grasp at.

Don't lose hope if she declines your invitation. Remain friends with her and maybe one day, she'll see how awesome a guy you are and ask *you* out.
 
:banghead: Yeah, I do this alot :banghead: I live in a small town of about 1200. I've been here since August and I get all kinds of smiles at the grocery store. They may be thinking "fresh meat" and I'm thinking I must have a nose goblin hanging or there must be a hunk standing behind me or something. Some day I'll get a clue.
 
pj1966 said:
That brings up another question. Why don't girls ask guys out? What is the big deal?
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For the same reasons guys can't always ask girls out. Fear of rejection, fear of romance, fear of commitment. Overall, we're all embedded with an inante sense of belonging, and to get that slapped back in our faces is a terribly miserable feeling. Personally, if I *know* the guy is attracted to me, I have no issue asking him out first. If I'm doubting whether or not he likes me, I will wait for him to make the first move. I think maybe it's why it takes so long sometimes for people to finally get together. Everyone is waiting on signs and wonders.
 
What would be a good response if she says "NO"? If that happens, people are going to see it.
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Turn to the person behind you in line. If it is a guy, punch him in the face. If it is a girl, cry on her shoulder, then ask her out.
 
pj1966 said:
That brings up another question. Why don't girls ask guys out? What is the big deal?
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Where have you been hiding? Girls ask guys out. But men like the thrill of the chase, so I have found it's better to let them do the asking. Besides, to quote from Seinfeld, we like to have "hand." :biggrinjester:

Ask the woman out. The worst she can do is say no. If she does, just say rather belligerantly, "Your loss, baby." LOL J/K--even if it's true. :D
 
I think it is all in the attitude. You are planning on what to say when she rejects you... You should be planning on where to take her when she says yes. Chicks dig confidence in a man. Go in there planning to rock her world.
 
bikinibound said:
Besides, to quote from Seinfeld, we like to have "hand."
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"Once in my life I would like the upper hand. I have no hand; no hand at all." ~ George.

If she wants to go out with you, then great. If she says no in front of all those people... who really cares what they think? Don't feel embarrassed. At least you gave it a shot. And you would never know what could have happened if you didn't ask her out in the first place.

Even if you were the most attractive man in the world, you still wouldn't get 100% of the female population to date you. Not everyone is looking for the same attributes in the opposite sex. Some women like short guys, some like tall. Some like brown hair, some blonde....and so on.

Just the opinion of a 22 year old male. Good luck to ya!

Edit: I didn't see this thread was resurrected. It's been a week or so, this probably isn't an issue anymore.
 
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