Hey everyone i'm new here and was hoping to find people/ideas that fit my lifestyle! i'm 24 years old and am pretty past the go out and party phase of my life, although, it's so hard to find people that are in the same position at my age! I'm obviously very into the fitness lifestyle and have been since before I can remember. I am far from introverted and don't mind going out from time to time but i just can't stand being around people that just want to drink all weekend, every weekend... please help! I'm open to anyones ideas! Let me know what you guys enjoy doing in your spare time and where i can go to find people like me!
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People like me?
- Thread starter PBAphysique
- Start date
I'm also 24 (although not for long). I think I got over the party phase of my life right around when we all grew pubic hair and suddenly fairy bread wasn't cool anymore. In other words, I never got into what the average 13-23yo calls "fun." I did drink a bit as a teenager (at home until I was 18), but stopped drinking altogether about 4 years ago, because even though I didn't have any compelling need to drink regularly, once I had alcohol in my hand it was unlikely that I'd stop drinking at any reasonable time -- the first inhibition to go when under the influence was always the inhibition against another drink. I do go out on occasion, but only with people who I like when we're sober, and as a sober person. People who just want to be drunk and get me drunk will either re-evaluate their own attitudes towards drinking around me when they realise that I'm not participating in the drunkenness, or they'll lose interest in having me around, if I don't lose interest in them first (in saying that, if you live to drink, then it's unlikely we had any common ground to begin with, so such a person and myself won't feel like we're missing out on much by not hanging out together).
As an adult I've become annoyingly Christian, which makes it easy for me to find people who aren't interested in drunkenness, although not so easy to find people who just don't drink, period. That's okay. People who can handle their liquor and have a few drinks without turning into arsehats are pleasant company from my POV. People who are arsehats despite being completely sober are also good entertainment. Outside of my Christian circles, people who don't live to drink are harder to come by, but they are around.
I'm a uni student at the moment. Here in Australia, the university culture (at least insofar as I've experienced) appears to place the occasional activation of the grey stuff between our ears ahead of demolishing said grey matter with alcohol, but that might just be that I gravitate towards people who exhibit subtle signs of being the same kind of weirdo as me, so it might just be that I'm super-effective at phasing out an awareness of people who I wouldn't be excited about knowing in the first place. Nonetheless, I seem to do alright at meeting people at uni whom I could stand to spend time with outside of uni.
I'm also a D&D nerd (the exact sort of person you'd expect to compete in powerlifting and be into fitness). The friends I make over D&D tend to overlap between my school and church circles, so maybe that doesn't help, but I've never played D&D with someone who, at the time, was heavily into drinking, even in high school.
My best advice would be to think about what hobbies and interests you have, rather than to focus on the party-obsession that you don't have, and get actively involved in groups who participate in those same hobbies and interests. In general, when people are focused on things other than drinking, they seem to do so either sober or with a sensible amount of alcohol in their system. I don't know what your interests are, and maybe you haven't thought about that, either. We both know what one of your interests is, and that's fitness. Ever notice how at the gym, most people are sober? This is a relevant starting point. Talk to people. The people whom you feel like talking to ever again are more likely to be like-minded. You probably have some other interests, though. Maybe they're activity-related, such as a sport, rock climbing, hiking, fishing (okay, that one's not all that active, unless perhaps you're using a spear), camping etc. Maybe it's intellectual, such as reading, writing, biology, puzzles, trivia. I don't know. But I do know that in my experience, the more you focus on living out a specific interest (or groups of interests), the less time you have to be blind drunk. And the more you do that socially, the more you'll find yourself hanging around with people who aren't obsessed with drinking, either.
As an adult I've become annoyingly Christian, which makes it easy for me to find people who aren't interested in drunkenness, although not so easy to find people who just don't drink, period. That's okay. People who can handle their liquor and have a few drinks without turning into arsehats are pleasant company from my POV. People who are arsehats despite being completely sober are also good entertainment. Outside of my Christian circles, people who don't live to drink are harder to come by, but they are around.
I'm a uni student at the moment. Here in Australia, the university culture (at least insofar as I've experienced) appears to place the occasional activation of the grey stuff between our ears ahead of demolishing said grey matter with alcohol, but that might just be that I gravitate towards people who exhibit subtle signs of being the same kind of weirdo as me, so it might just be that I'm super-effective at phasing out an awareness of people who I wouldn't be excited about knowing in the first place. Nonetheless, I seem to do alright at meeting people at uni whom I could stand to spend time with outside of uni.
I'm also a D&D nerd (the exact sort of person you'd expect to compete in powerlifting and be into fitness). The friends I make over D&D tend to overlap between my school and church circles, so maybe that doesn't help, but I've never played D&D with someone who, at the time, was heavily into drinking, even in high school.
My best advice would be to think about what hobbies and interests you have, rather than to focus on the party-obsession that you don't have, and get actively involved in groups who participate in those same hobbies and interests. In general, when people are focused on things other than drinking, they seem to do so either sober or with a sensible amount of alcohol in their system. I don't know what your interests are, and maybe you haven't thought about that, either. We both know what one of your interests is, and that's fitness. Ever notice how at the gym, most people are sober? This is a relevant starting point. Talk to people. The people whom you feel like talking to ever again are more likely to be like-minded. You probably have some other interests, though. Maybe they're activity-related, such as a sport, rock climbing, hiking, fishing (okay, that one's not all that active, unless perhaps you're using a spear), camping etc. Maybe it's intellectual, such as reading, writing, biology, puzzles, trivia. I don't know. But I do know that in my experience, the more you focus on living out a specific interest (or groups of interests), the less time you have to be blind drunk. And the more you do that socially, the more you'll find yourself hanging around with people who aren't obsessed with drinking, either.
Wow thank you for the great reply! I agree that I need to get involved with some sort of sport or active club. I spend a ton of time in the gym but I tend to be very focused on my lifts when i'm there which does make it difficult to socialize, although, I have met some great people in the gym. I'm also a student so there's the obvious limiting factors for me such as money; but I have recently been looking seriously into picking up some certifications and training people for part time work! I've been helping friends with dieting and training for years so I might as well get paid for it lol. That and working in a restaurant to make my way through school just isn't cutting it for me anymore lol. Again thank you for all the great ideas! i'm very interested to see what everybody here enjoys doing!
I was feeling the same way when I finished my enlistment in the Navy, and got out into the real world, I decided that I had my fill of partying, I quit smoking, and quit drinking, at least for the sake of getting drunk. I do have a taste for beer but I like them because I like the taste not unlike the way I enjoy a coffee, and I rarely drink more than a few at a time. I moved to San Francisco for a job where I didn't know anyone, and I work in Field service, which means I don’t have interaction with coworkers; I work from home and I’m dispatched out to customer sites to deal with their problems. For a while I was going out to clubs on weekends because it was the only way I knew to be around other people my age. I mostly just got annoyed with all the drunks rather than making friends or meeting women.
Eventually I discovered a local ultimate Frisbee pickup game where I started meeting some cool people who like doing fun things during the days on weekends rather than just recovering from hangovers. My social life really got going when I got into bike racing, joined a team and got tied into the local cycling community. I’m not religious but the main reason why I kind of wished I was is because when religious people move, they just go find a church and they are automatically tied into a supportive social group of somewhat like-minded people. I have moved a few times since I got into bike racing, and similarly when I move I just show up to some races to see what team I want to join, and ba-da-Bing… instant social life.
I’m not saying bike racing is the best or only way to do this… you see these things all the time though, Softball leagues, city league basketball teams, YMCA racquetball tournaments, master’s swimming groups, running clubs. I’m sure there are cool people in the gym, but most people who are there look at it like taking a shower or brushing their teeth. Its part of what they do most days to take care of their body, they aren't really there to have fun or socialize.
Eventually I discovered a local ultimate Frisbee pickup game where I started meeting some cool people who like doing fun things during the days on weekends rather than just recovering from hangovers. My social life really got going when I got into bike racing, joined a team and got tied into the local cycling community. I’m not religious but the main reason why I kind of wished I was is because when religious people move, they just go find a church and they are automatically tied into a supportive social group of somewhat like-minded people. I have moved a few times since I got into bike racing, and similarly when I move I just show up to some races to see what team I want to join, and ba-da-Bing… instant social life.
I’m not saying bike racing is the best or only way to do this… you see these things all the time though, Softball leagues, city league basketball teams, YMCA racquetball tournaments, master’s swimming groups, running clubs. I’m sure there are cool people in the gym, but most people who are there look at it like taking a shower or brushing their teeth. Its part of what they do most days to take care of their body, they aren't really there to have fun or socialize.