Weight-Loss Nature or nurture?

Weight-Loss
Mrs Bear

Mrs Bear

New member
I have just read Camsdenkentish's post on the 'Introducing yourself' thread, and I agree with her in that we develop a sweet tooth. Give up sugar for a few weeks and it goes away. A lot of parents do feel that something sweet is a necessary treat or pudding for their children, because it is to them, and that they would be denying their child something if they didn't give it to them. Its the same way all children's menus are littered with burgers, breaded stuff and chips! I have heard people say, but kids like sweet stuff, they wont eat anything but burgers. But is that what they like, or what they have been programmed to like?

I've put down my opinion, so I am opening the debate. What do you guys think? Have any of you sworn off sweets for your children and had positive results, or is it too difficult when all the other kids are eating sweets and your kids feel left out? I would be really interested to know as I worry about what bad habits I will pass on to my kids when I start a family.:confused:
 
I have no kids and don't want 'em...

but I see other people with their children and wonder why a person would give a child a sugar and caffeine laden soda pop? then wonder why the child can't sit still...

I can honestly say that when I was a kid - back when the dinosaurs walked the earth --my mother fed us relatively healthily - well at least according tothe food pyrmamid of the day... Yes there were a lot of white breads and pastas and stuff, but 30 + years ago, I don't think whole wheat was readily available unless you were a crunchy granola type - those didn't exist in suburban New Jersey... :)

My mother used to open the front door for us in the morning, and tell us to be home by dark - sitting home playing games or watching tv would not be allowed (plus having us underfoot would have driven my mother nuts)

I think my biggest problem as an adult and when the weight started coming on came from a 'habit' developed as a kid... And that's eating on the run... or rather not having set meal times and not having dinner with the family... or multitasking when eating... my dad always worked late, so my mother would hold her dinner and have it with him - -the kids woudl get fed in front of the television set... BAD HABIT...

The other habit was being a member of the clean plate club... where you weren't allowed dessert (even it was fruit salad) unless you cleaned your plate because there were starving children somewhere... That really isn't great for portion control - you stop eating when you are no longer hungry rather than just what's in front of you.

Ok, i'm ranting back to your question...

I think all things in moderation are OK - because it takes the forbiddenness out of it - but to use it as a reward for something is bad... to use food as any kind of reward, even if it's somethng healthy is bad...

I have 2 nephews that have absolutely atrocious eating habits... they eat nothing but chicken mcnuggets... no vegetables - -no fruits -- no whole grains -- my sister feeds it to them and kind of throws her hands up at what to do... She also caters to this diet and lets them eat it... These boys are also video game junkies... and will spend hours playing games.. not outside playing.. neither one has a weight problem now, but will probably develop one later on because they are being allowed such unhealthy habits now...
 
I too am a member of the clean plate club. I say am because I still find it difficult not to clean my plate. It seems like a waste, but then throwing food into my stomach, like it was a dustbin, when I do not want or need it is no less wasteful. I can remember being a kid, I would eat anything but my middle sister was very picky. My mum would leave her in the kitchen sat at the table with sprouts and potato skins on her plate, not allowed to leave until she had eaten it all. So Miss Dustbin here would hoover up the rest ( I love both those things) and we were both happy. Strangely enough, we are both overweight, despite having completely different eating habits.

My dad is not overweight, but he does have a small amount of middle aged spread (mostly from fine wine and party food). But he has breakfast at 6am, lunch at 12ish, and dinner at 6:30-7pm. No other food during his working day....except he opens the cracker barrel while dinner is cooking :eek: And woomph! Half a packet goes in minutes. My mum said he was shocked while watching one of the 'change your life' programmes, when they said to eat 6 times a day. He thought this would be bad and make you put on weight. I think he is starting to realise that old ways of thinking were sometimes wrong.

My parents were quite restrictive of us when we were young. We had desserts, but everything was very much, clean your plate of the healthy food, and only have a set portion of the 'nice' foods. I used to always sneak extra portions of desserts, when at the time I was hyperactive and slim so could have eaten more. But that started me off sneaking food. Then my mum went back to work, and I would sit after school in the kitchen with the telly on and just eat ... anything. Biscuits with chocolate sauce on them. Raw porridge oats with lots of sugar and milk. Sometimes if I thought the milk would be missed, I would have dry porridge oats with lots of sugar on its own. Why!?! :confused: It's sweet but apart from that its not very nice to eat.

I think what worries me about having kids, is I don't have the answers. My mum has had weight problems her whole life, and she did what she felt would save us from having the same problems that she had ... but it didn't. How do I know I will not make the same mistakes :confused:
 
Well here's my two cents. There's a little to both. I do know that one reason kids like sweet things is the same reason they same to crave real sour foods. Like the rest of them, their taste buds are developing and they don't quite taste things the same way adults do. They do have a proclivity for basic flavors like sweetness.

I've seen a lot of my friends absolutely refuse to have the slightest unhealthy food item in their homes. I believe this is insane as well. Kids do need to be taught good habits and that some foods are only sometimes foods. They shouldn't have behavior rewarded with food or taught that exercise is hard work. The problem with eliminating all junk food from their lives is it is impossible to do successfully. If you never teach them the skills to deal with junk--when faced with it they'll most likely not be able to make wise choices.

I want my children (If I ever get around to having them) to know the joy of ice cream on a hot summer day and to enjoy eating pizza with their friends while watching horror movies. I just wouldn't want that to be such a large part of their diet like it did become for me. All things need to be in moderation.
 
I havent had sugar or sweets of any kind in my system since 2. january 2006. It is a part of my food-plan to eliminate everything sweet from my nutrition, except for fruits. You wouldnt believe what difference it really makes in my life, both physically and mentally. I even have begun to think that the reaction of the body to sugar doesnt differ so much from reactions to drugs or alchohol. Let me explain why.....

When I stopped eating sugar I actually felt withdrawal symptoms. I got to be very agitated and I wanted something sweet SO BAD..... ! After few days without sugar I had luckily recovered from that craving. Nearly everyone I know with a weightproblem that has cut sugar out from their nutrition feel the same things including the recovery from the craving. Now there are around 172 days since I ate sugar and now I noticed how sugar was affecting my life in a bad way.

Physically I obiously lost a lot of weight, but also I stopped being so tired all the time. Before I had to sleep 10-12 hours a day, but still felt exhausted the whole day, but after only few weeks on my food-plan I felt my energy level booming. Now I only have to sleep 5-7 hours, and the sleep I get is HIGH-quality, plus I have no problem in getting to the sleep itself as before. I am filled with energy the whole day, I even stopped drinking coffee because I dont need the caffeine boost anymore. People that are on the same food-plan, but fail and start eating sweets again all say that when they did so, the tiredness came instantly, so sugar playes obviously is a reason for being tired all the time. I even recognize people that I meet, as being big time sugar consumers (and generally have lousy nutrition). Their complexion is kind of grey and they all have those tired eyes. You can even see it in my before and after 75 lbs pics (on the before and after and in between board).

Mentally I stopped having moodswings and irritability, as I always felt after a candy binge. I even noticed that sugar had actually made me depressed, not to mention being a huge trigger for cravings for food and sweets. By eliminating sugar from my nutrition I felt I had finally control over my cravings because I wasnt eating the trigger food anymore. I got a confirmation on that when I had bought cranberry juice that I thought had no added sugar (I read the label but it didnt mention any). I drank only 1/2 of a small glass, but in less then a minute I found out that it DID have sugar in it, because my mood started to swing violently, I was so irritable plus I had such an AWFUL sugar and food craving. I hadnt felt that way since I stopped eating sugar, but I recognized the symptoms from my candy binges in the past. It took me 1-2 hours to shake that feeling from me, and to gain control over my bloodsugar.

To give children what they want to eat is not an good idea. Children dont have fully developed their good-decisions-skills, thats a fact. Children are not allowed to drive cars because they dont have the mental abbilities to handle that task, and the same with food. Of course they choose the sweet and salty foods because they have the most appealing taste for a childs tastebud. I even cant think of a child that eats healthy by choice. If a child decides what to eat, they wont eat healthy. It is a thing that should be tought the same way as good manner and social skills etc...... Junk-food is also advertised aggressively all over the western world, and the commercials are obviously directed to children, because so many of them have control on what is bought in the store. In our society junk-food and sweets are promoted to be the "FUN" food, and healthy food goes then in the "BORING" food section. Just imagine if instead of commercials about how fun junk-food is, that there were commercials about tomatoes or cabbage, where it is shown as a appealing, great tasting, FUN food, because in reality they ARE the fun food. As soon as you get your tastebuds away from the junk and start eating some veggies and fruit, you will recognize that they actually taste better then the junk that tastes in fact awful. Its like an insult and assault on the taste buds in my opinion.
Well I could go on and on. Its a good topic, but not so many are talking about the junk our kids are eating, and why they arent drinking water and eating veggies and fruits as they should do.
 
Heidrun, you are such an inspiration to me. I think that giving up sugar is the way to go for me because, like you, it just makes me feel lousy, and once I start there is no stopping me.

I hate to be all 'last supper' about it, but I have my husband's birthday party this coming weekend, and I will have a few drinks and probably some dessert, but after that I am going to try to do what you have done. I may even put a running total of days in my signature. They do say that it takes several weeks for the addiction to be broken, and I think I am just going to have to admit that sugar is one thing that I am going to have to do without. I am sure I will thank myself when I get to your stage!!

And well said about giving kids what they want!! Kids don't always want to go to school, but we don't cave in and say 'Okay, you can stay at home everyday, and watch TV, and have every toy you want, and talk back to me, and hit your brother, etc.....' It is exactly the same.

Thanks again for your inspiration, and you can keep an eye on my signature (after next weekend :D ) and make sure that I am keeping off the sugar ;) .
 
It is such an good idea with the "last supper", and you know what? I did exactly the same thing when I stopped eating sugar. 1. january I went out to the store and bought every single junk-food and sweats I wanted and ate them all that day. After eating every single piece I felt awful, and I promised myself, that I would remember this horrible feeling everytime I wanted candy or junk. It was my way of saying goodbye to the junk i had craved so much. I think that by doing this it was much easier to withstand the cravings the following weeks. I always thought when I wanted some junk "well you said goodbye to them, so you just have to wait untill you reach your goal".

So in fact you are doing just the right thing, it worked for me!!
 
Since I changed to healthy living three months ago, I have noticed that I dont desire or particularly enjoy fizzy sweet drinks like diet coke anymore. I prefer a fruit juice or water. Strange. I keep a few pots of nice honey around for treats at home and at work - a drizzle of lovely honey on wholemeal bread does just the trick on a busy day! Otherwise, I don't miss sweet sugary things too much - and I used to binge on chocolite digestives...
 
I suppose it IS just a matter of getting used to another way of eating. It almost seems impossible, but reading the comments both of you have made really does inspire me to give it a try atleast, and seriously this time. I have tried in the past but I don't think I was every as committed to it as I feel now. I do feel like Christmas and birthdays, or the weekend, does not mean I will be able to have some sugar as a treat, because it is addictive and starts it all off again.

PS - Heidrun, I went on a day trip to Iceland a few years back, and I swam in the Blue Lagoon! It was fantastic!
 
I felt probably exactly like you when I started on my weightloss. I thought it was such a sacrifice to give up all the binge food and candy, but I knew I had to do something at 400+ lbs. It was either to face the problem or die at a young age. I couldnt even think of my life without candy, in fact I begun with the food-plan convinced that they probably would let me have one day every week where I could eat candy.

The longer I ate according to my foodplan, the less I craved sugar. The first weeks were difficult, but after that it has become less difficult. In fact, it feels very easy now, almost like its automatic to eat the way I do. The thing that has helped me the most to keep on track, is the fact that I eat the same amounts of the same catogory food every day. That means I weigh everything I eat, and I eat very regularly, with the same meals every day. When I get so much structure in the food consumption, then I feel it is so much easier to withstand cravings, because I dont really have to decide how much I will eat, and which kind of foods. It is already decided, so the only thing I have to do is to eat according to the plan.

Just remember its only the first weeks and months that are difficult, but with time passing you will find out that life without sugar, is actually much better then any candy you have tasted. Remember that you arent eliminating the sweet taste from your food.... FRUITS, you can eat as you want of them, and they have a very sweet taste, and in fact I look at fruits as my candy now.
 
Thanks Heidrun, I like to eat very similar foods all the time and I suppose I do thrive on routine, so I think I will try your approach. Knowing that it has worked for you, and that it will be hard at first but will get easier, will help me stay motivated and hopefully make me successful this time! :) . I'll keep you posted ;)
 
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