CrazyCarLady
New member
Hi there ,
I'm new to all this so please bare with me,
I'm beguinning to battle with myself constantly with my weight. For years and through my teens I didn't give an ounce of care towards what people saw in me and what my weight was. Recently, and in the last 8 months I cannot shift my mindset from thinking I'm too big and I need to make a change...
starting off- I tried the inevitable 'Juice Plus' boosters, forced myself while gagging to swallow the mixture of boosters and set myself regular meal breaks (even around my shifts)---(ish!) then I purchased appetite pills and shake concoctions to try and fill me up, give me the vitamins and everything I need ect ect. No change.
Over Xmas just gone and looking forward to my holiday booked with my fiancé (1st one abroad together-yippee) I've just felt like a big sack of potatoes. Underneath the layers of the fat me, I do sport an hourglass figure ... much to my disgust it's got a lot more sand than anyone else's in! I do have a larger than average bust and this is possibly the only thing keeping my body looking a bit less fat .. but that isn't making me feel any better.
January I started cycling on an exercise bike, ate 3 meals a day one being a slimfast shake, tried walking just about everywhere .. and at the start I weighed 96.4kg.
(I'm 5'5" and my BMI comes in at about 33 at the moment. 96kg definately isn't where I should be.)
I work full time shifts as an Ambulance Care Assistant, so at work I'm generally pretty mobile, carry chairs and stretcher pulling are daily tasks.. by February I weighed in at 94.6kg .. and it all stopped.. I couldn't lose any, I didn't feel any better, so I started snacking again (still fruit, and the occasional crisps) but didn't bother so much... still I can't shift any more of this weight.. recent weigh in is at 94.6kg!? How does that work?
I try talking to my Fiancé about how I'm feeling but he tells me I'm his no matter what and blah blah I just think he says it because he has to. The Jammy idiot can eat what he likes and generally eats twice the amount that I do in a day anyway! Yet is only a 28/30inch waist and fit as they come! If I try and say I want to lose weight the answer usually comes back as 'you should try more exercise, do more' but I literally can't fit in the gym everyday and after 5 shifts in my week and his son at our house for weekends I literally don't have time.. or any energy!
Today I have 61 days until I fly out to a sunny resort and the thing I'm dreading most? ... my weight! I just don't know what to do, I can't get motivated and I just think I'm working for nothing.. I don't want to look like the beached whale on holiday and I don't want my super hot fit slim fiancé seeing something better across the pool and wondering why I can't look like that
Are some people just meant to be fat?
I'm feeling so low about it, makes me want to eat because I don't care anymore.. (which in actual fact is the opposite because I couldn't care MORE about how I look lately)
Some advice?
Thank you.
I'm new to all this so please bare with me,
I'm beguinning to battle with myself constantly with my weight. For years and through my teens I didn't give an ounce of care towards what people saw in me and what my weight was. Recently, and in the last 8 months I cannot shift my mindset from thinking I'm too big and I need to make a change...
starting off- I tried the inevitable 'Juice Plus' boosters, forced myself while gagging to swallow the mixture of boosters and set myself regular meal breaks (even around my shifts)---(ish!) then I purchased appetite pills and shake concoctions to try and fill me up, give me the vitamins and everything I need ect ect. No change.
Over Xmas just gone and looking forward to my holiday booked with my fiancé (1st one abroad together-yippee) I've just felt like a big sack of potatoes. Underneath the layers of the fat me, I do sport an hourglass figure ... much to my disgust it's got a lot more sand than anyone else's in! I do have a larger than average bust and this is possibly the only thing keeping my body looking a bit less fat .. but that isn't making me feel any better.
January I started cycling on an exercise bike, ate 3 meals a day one being a slimfast shake, tried walking just about everywhere .. and at the start I weighed 96.4kg.
(I'm 5'5" and my BMI comes in at about 33 at the moment. 96kg definately isn't where I should be.)
I work full time shifts as an Ambulance Care Assistant, so at work I'm generally pretty mobile, carry chairs and stretcher pulling are daily tasks.. by February I weighed in at 94.6kg .. and it all stopped.. I couldn't lose any, I didn't feel any better, so I started snacking again (still fruit, and the occasional crisps) but didn't bother so much... still I can't shift any more of this weight.. recent weigh in is at 94.6kg!? How does that work?
I try talking to my Fiancé about how I'm feeling but he tells me I'm his no matter what and blah blah I just think he says it because he has to. The Jammy idiot can eat what he likes and generally eats twice the amount that I do in a day anyway! Yet is only a 28/30inch waist and fit as they come! If I try and say I want to lose weight the answer usually comes back as 'you should try more exercise, do more' but I literally can't fit in the gym everyday and after 5 shifts in my week and his son at our house for weekends I literally don't have time.. or any energy!
Today I have 61 days until I fly out to a sunny resort and the thing I'm dreading most? ... my weight! I just don't know what to do, I can't get motivated and I just think I'm working for nothing.. I don't want to look like the beached whale on holiday and I don't want my super hot fit slim fiancé seeing something better across the pool and wondering why I can't look like that
Are some people just meant to be fat?
I'm feeling so low about it, makes me want to eat because I don't care anymore.. (which in actual fact is the opposite because I couldn't care MORE about how I look lately)
Some advice?
Thank you.
